Your Mom in a bikini contest, Egyptian Kids TV, Big Ass In a Bikini, STRYPER does SABBATH, Ridiculous Guitar Solo of the Day, New FOUNDRY CAMS, new VIOLET video, New Jennifer White

We give your mom all kinds of credit for entering a bikini contest

We give her even MORE credit for posting the photo on her personal ad... your dad would be proud!

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Just like your dumpster-sized ass. Happy birthday, here's a treadmill)

You got your colorful characters on the wall, a catatonic kid, and a stuffed rabbit on a couch...

Oh yeah, you got a host spewing anti-Jewish sentiments to the audience. You got yourself an Egyptian Kids' show!

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:

(Unlike your waist size, which seems to increase weekly)

Now whose big ass in a bikini could this be?

Here's a hint: She used to get pummeled by Axl Rose back in the day. (Drunken Stepfather)

Inga is the kind of girl who can lean up against our tree any time she wants... we have a tree reserved for her (FreakShow Planet)

Featured Model: Michelle (Bullz-Eye)

Angelina Polska is the kind of Polish Sausage we'd like to sink our teeth into. NO, that was NOT a gay remark!!! (z0d)

Li'l Lupe Fuentes likes girls. She likes feeling them up. She likes having nookie with them. She likes everything about them. Just click it already, moneky man. (Daily Niner)

I'M SORRY:
(Sorry your left tit is obnoxiously larger than your right one Why dontcha get that fixed, honey?)

You wouldn't expect a Bible-thumping band like STRYPER to be doing a cover of "Heaven and Hell"...:

...but you'd be wrong, Chester. Now SUCK it.

...and now for your ridiculously-complicated guitar solo of the day, courtesy of my former guitar teacher STEPHEN ROSS:

This dude was doing overly-complicated before overly-complicated was commonplace. Now we think he works in a shoe factory somewhere in Asbury Park, New Jersey. Actually, we don't know. That just sounded funnier.

WHAT??? No Boobies? You gotta be kidding me! Relax, Chester, we got plenty:

We totally revamped FOUNDRY CAMS, with a new domain, new girls, lower prices, and a better user experience. So far, the response has beeen HUGE. Check it out:


Click it, fool!

Speaking of FOUNDRY CAMS check out what the lovely VIOLET did for her St Patricks Day video

Green Bikini and Green Heels... of course they didn't stay on for long. You can catch her on LIVE now at FOUNDRY CAMS

Anyone know who Jennifer White is? No? Figures. You're not all sickos like us

She's in a li'l movie called Big Wet Asses 18- Which you can get right now...because you're an impulsive asshole just like me. Don't even try to deny it.

Switching gears (kind of)... let's lookee here...

If Emma Ink looks familiar, that's because she's been in other FOUNDRY CAMS videos.
Thanks to Jon for the editing, as always.

Watch the vid. Get all excited... then get yourself on over to Emma-Ink.com and watch Emma LIVE, on webcam, getting naked and dirty just for you. (and we do mean JUST for you, because she'll do the private VIP thing if you want)




...and that, friends... is the way to impress a gal on a first dateway to make a greek salad.

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

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