Friday, April 22, 2011

Your mom has a crispy butt, SAMMY HAGAR alien bit, DUKE NUKEM FOREVER - Uncensored, X-MEN: FIRST CLASS, Hasselhof's new Girlfriend, ALICE COOPER at Golden Gods, New music from the POODLES and JOURNEY


Remember, kids... you follow us and we'll follow you!
You follow US on twitter and we follow YOU on twitter. Simple enough, right?
- Follow this one and we'll keep you up to date on all the cockfights we have going on in the basement
- Now Follow this one (we'll keep you up to date on what all the girlies are doing)



  • Your mom's ass is burning on the passenger seat of that car...that doesn't belong to your dad


  • Apparently she's none too worried about who sees photos like this because she's posting them in online personal ads.

    THAT's TERRIBLE:
    (Just like the way you pretend your hair isn't falling out in clumps on an hourly basis)
  • This bit that SAMMY HAGAR did on Jimmy Kimmel LIVE wasn't all THAT bad:

    It wasn't all that GOOD either.


  • Anything to sell some books, right, Sammy?

    THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:

    (Unlike your hairline, which would look better if you combed your eyebrows up over your head)

  • The trailer for DUKE NUKEM FOREVER is full of blood, guts...and school girl strippers kissing:

    When oh when will this game be available?!?!


  • Oh. Mid-June. That's not so bad. Heh. We worry too much.

  • The second international trailer for X-MEN: FIRST CLASS has a handful more of 'blink and you'll miss them' cool moments in it:

    The editors must add in the new footage as they get it and then release new trailers.. either that, or their lazy as shit.


  • Mutants. Make a man mean...usually. Or they make him chubby, depending on how much time he spends on the couch watching these.

  • David Hasselhoff got his self a cute-ass girlfriend named Hayley Roberts:

    For once, it would be nice to be a famous drunk... or just famous.

    Nikki Kane and Renee Perez lose their lingerie and don't bother looking for it (FreakShow Planet)

    Cisco Kills the Flip Video: What it means to the Consumer Market (Bullz-Eye)

    Tito Ortiz on Life with Jenna Jameson (MadeMan)

    Amy Reid is wearing her tube top a little, umm...low (z0d)

    Cody Love is the dirtiest, most greatest maid of all time (Daily Niner)




  • I'M SORRY:
    (Sorry you're going to muddle through life with the same mediocrity you attack every other task with)

  • Sorry you missed ALICE COOPER and his original band at the REVOLVER GOLDEN GODS Awards:

    Some of those guys look like they could lay off the cheeseburgers... yeah, like who are we kidding? Look who's talking.



  • All the ALICE COOPER you could ever want to get yer stinkin' mitts on, Chester.

    Want to still look cool with tight leather pants and bleached hair? Move to Sweden. Join a band:

    Otherwise you just look silly. Speaking of Silly, these guys are called THE POODLES

    Performocracy? Yup. Definitely Swedish...Mmmm...swedish fish.

    The guys in JOURNEY have a Filipino singer (yeah, we know. Enough already) and a new tour:

    They're going to be touring with STYX and FOREIGNER... sponsored by Geritol and Icy Hot.

    Ooh, that cool beetle thing-a-ma-jig is back Someone in that band digs beetles, or is running out of ideas.

    How much for ze little girlz, eh?

    Facelifts are let's face it, necessary...and FOUNDRY CAMS was no exception to that rule, so we did this:

    We totally revamped FOUNDRY CAMS, with a new domain, hotter girls, lower prices, and a better user experience. So far, the response has beeen HUGE. Check it out:


    and if you feel like following us on Twitter (we'll keep you up to date on what all the girlies are doing)

    Click it, fool!

  • Speaking of FOUNDRY CAMS check out what WE got from one of our newer gals:
    Lita Lenee, one of our newer young ladies in the FOUNDRY CAMS flock, sent in an amazing videos with a slightly (OK, VERY) revised old-school FoundryMusic T-shirt. Nikki Sixx and our friends at SIXX A.M. sent in "Lies of the Beautiful People" from their new album "This Is Gonna Hurt". Put 'em together and you have one hell of a great video.
    Thanks to Jon for the editing as usual.



    CLICK THE PIC. WATCH THE VIDEO. DIG THE MUSIC.

    When you're all done, if you have any fluids left in that body of yours, head on over to FOUNDRY CAMS and chat with the lovely Lita Lenee LIVE on cam!

    Thanks again to SIXX A.M. for sending in "Lies of the Beautiful People" from their upcoming album "This Is Gonna Hurt".

    ...and that, friends... is the way to make gazpacho with dead hookers.

  • Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

    We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

    FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

    Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

    be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

    We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

    We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

    We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

    FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.


  • Wednesday, April 20, 2011

    New TWITTER, MILF washing a Ferrari, Winger Winging it, BRUCE LEE auditioning, New ANVIL, Old NIGHT RANGER, New THIN LIZZY line-up, Lisa Ann, Julia Ann, Mary Carey...Ann


    Remember, kids... you follow us and we'll follow you!
    You follow US on twitter and we follow YOU on twitter. Simple enough, right?
    - Follow this one and we'll keep you up to date on all the cockfights we have going on in the basement
    - Now Follow this one (we'll keep you up to date on what all the girlies are doing)



  • Why is your mom washing your dad's Ferrari with steel wool pads? Dad must have done something none-too-pleasing


  • and how do we know it's your mom? She posted the pic online in a personal ad... Dad's not getting the job done at home, evidently.

    THAT's TERRIBLE:
    (Just like the way you pretend your hair isn't falling out in clumps on an hourly basis)
  • When is WINGER going to change the name of "Seventeen" to "Thirty-eight"... you know, considering the age factor of the fans:

    *rimshot*... fine, it wasn't one of our best.


  • That clip was actually shot in 2007...just to show you how timely we are... Boooooooooo.

    THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:

    (Unlike your hairline, which would look better if you combed your eyebrows up over your head)

  • Who wants to see Bruce Lee's original audition for the role of Kato on 'The Green Hornet'? We're gonna show you anyway:

    Pay special attention to the Kung Fu demonstration with the old man (about halfway through)


  • Oooh - look what's coming to video soon! This wasn't half bad, actually.

  • Jennifer Lopez has a bit of a sloppy stomach:

    Why she's showing it off, we don't know

    Neveah and Raina Lee touching tongues. Yay. (FreakShow Planet)

    2011 Suzuki Kizashi Review (Bullz-Eye)

    Dating Tips from the Funniest Women on Twitter (How About We)

    I'm Ashamed to be a Boston Sports Fan (MadeMan)

    Chikita...she's one hot banana...and by 'banana' we mean 'large-breasted blond babe' (z0d)

    Victoria Rae Black may be pasty, but she's way purty (Daily Niner)




  • I'M SORRY:
    (Sorry you're going to muddle through life with the same mediocrity you attack every other task with)

  • Did you NOT hear the latest ANVIL song? Well, here ya go:

    "Juggernaut of Justice"...nothing like subtlety. Love it! We're sure it'll sell tens of copies.



  • OK, maybe a hundred copies. C'mon, look at that cover art.

    How many original members of a band do you need to keep using the name? If you're THIN LIZZY, the answer is ONE. Maybe two:

    When one of your guitarists has to leave to re-join DEF LEPPARD, you're bordering on silly...

    DULUXE EDITION?!?! Well, then I should rush out and buy this bugger right now.

    Hey Mexico! We're NIGHT RANGER! Here's a song you may not have heard a hundred thousand times in the past 26 years:

    See, that was what we call sarcasm. Anyone who hasn't heard "Sister Christian" has probably been living on Jupiter... or at least Mars... for a while.

    ...and this is the last album the band released. Umm, no one is buying music these days, if you haven't already figured that out.

    How much for ze little girlz, eh?

    We've got a double-banger of our favorite MILF, Lisa Ann for you... banger...bang-her... get it? *rimshot*
    Lisa Ann is seducing a very lucky grocery boy in this clip.

    VERY lucky. SUPER lucky. EXTRA-SPECIAL super-lucky, with sugar on top...and on the sides.

    ...and here's the lovely Lisa Ann in leopard-print lingerie.

    OK, enough alliteration for one stupid entry. Alright already.

  • OK, folks...show of hands: who wants to see blond MILF Julia Ann roll around half-naked on a pool table?

    Yeah, that's what we thought. All of you. whatcha waitin' for then?


  • Our braniac friend Mary Carey loves taking her clothes off outside. How do we know?

    Because every damn clip she sends us features her... taking her clothes off outside. THAT's how we know

    Facelifts are let's face it, necessary...and FOUNDRY CAMS was no exception to that rule, so we did this:

    We totally revamped FOUNDRY CAMS, with a new domain, hotter girls, lower prices, and a better user experience. So far, the response has beeen HUGE. Check it out:


    and if you feel like following us on Twitter (we'll keep you up to date on what all the girlies are doing)

    Click it, fool!

  • Speaking of FOUNDRY CAMS check out what WE got from GISELE:
    The lovely blonde Gisele, who you have seen in dozens of FOUNDRY CAMS videos, is back at it once again with a hosed-down FoundryMusic T-shirt, high heels, and very little else on. She's shaking her perfectly-formed hiney to FOUNDRY's "Ain't Like You" from the RETOOLED album, mixed by Rich DeCicco and featuring our buddy Rob Balducci on guitar. Thanks as always to Jon for the editing.

    Buy FOUNDRY: Retooled now at Amazon:



    Watch Video. Click Photo. Enjoy Gisele. Simple, right? (you'd be shocked how many people fuck that up)

    ...and that, friends... is the way to make salsa in woodchipper.

  • Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

    We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

    FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

    Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

    be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

    We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

    We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

    We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

    FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.


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