R.I.P. Mike Starr, Worst Parent EVER, FAST FIVE Trailer 2, AC/DC in Argentina, GUS G can shred, SHINEDOWN makes you want to pump iron, Ava Devine and Krissy Lynn

If your mom and her friends are going to keep posting photos like this online:

You may want to start charging at the door to your house because her personal ads are getting quite the response.

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Just like your contribution to society...nothing)

First and foremost, we say "Goodbye" to Mike Starr, formerly of ALICE IN CHAINS:

first Layne Staley, now Mike. God must be planning a reunion tour.

Contrary to popular belief, if you don't f*** with the bull, you STILL get the horns:

Why anyone would want to sit unprotected in the front row of a bullfight is really a mystery.

And the award for 'Worst parent in the UNIVERSE goes to... *drumroll*:

Guy who let his four year-old daughter drive his motorcycle while he casually rides bitch with no hands. Yeah, that guy's gonna be dead soon.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:

(You know, unlike your face, breath, hairline, and general disposition)

The latest trailer for FAST FIVE has more testosterone in it than your garden variety syringe full of... well, testosterone:

See, testosterone injections are used primarily by bodybuilders and women looking to grow more facial hair.

Nice hair, Katy Perry. Pick a color, would ya?

Did we miss something? Does KATY PERRY not like LADY GAGA, or is she infatuated? (Drunken Stepfather)

A Collection of 16 Insanely Awesome Bowling Balls (The Smoking Jacket)

Jenna Nicole has see-through undies... but we think she knows that already (FreakShow Planet)

Heath & Fitness Q&A: Free Weights vs. Machines (Bullz Eye)

Yvonne will Yreally Ymake You Yexcited. Y'hear? (z0d)

Kiara Diane makes excellent use of a shower head in this very special episode (Daily Niner)

I'M SORRY:
(Sorry you have no ambition other than sucking off the tits of those wealthier than you)

The SHINEDOWN video for "Diamond Eyes" featues a TON of footage from The EXPENDABLES:

You should be pumping iron and cracking skulls in no time...and then going to jail, because you really shouldn't be doing that casually.

Gus G from FIREWIND and OZZY OSBOURNE's band uses ESP Guitars exclusively:

and no, there was no other reason to post this video than to gawk at how well this summbitch plays guitar.

Finally, after two years, the AC/DC video for LIVE at RIVER PLATE is being released:

Again, there was no real great reason to post this clip other than to stare in amazement of the kind of crowds that go to see hard rock bands in Buenos Aires.

From hard rock, we gently sashay into Rock Hard butts:

Everyone say "how-dee-doo" to Krissy Lynn

She's shaking her bottom because she's thrilled to be in Big Wet Asses #18... yes, there have been seventeen of these already. Believe it or not.

Who here knows (or cares) who AVA DEVINE is?

yeah, we had NO idea either, and then we watched THESE... oofah

Switching gears (kind of)... let's lookee here...

If Emma Ink looks familiar, that's because she's been in other FOUNDRY CAMS clips before (these girls change their names like they're changing their panties, for crying out loud). She's tattooed up and would be the perfect trophy to add to the back of your motorcycle... if you're into that kind of thing. Thanks to our friends in FURNAZE for the friendly music.
Thanks to Jon for the editing, as always.

Watch the vid. Get all excited... then get yourself on over to Emma-Ink.com and watch Emma LIVE, on webcam, getting naked and dirty just for you. (and we do mean JUST for you, because she'll do the private VIP thing if you want)




...and that, friends... is the way to impress a gal on a first date

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

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Runaway Crane vs. Police Car, Robust Redneck vs. POISON song, ALICE in CHAINS in NYC, OZZY in Italy, Ripper Owens in Tiny Clubs, The POODLES in tight pants, Sasha Grey topless montage, Big boob-fest with Shay Laren, Ava Addams, Leanne Crow, Jelena Jensen

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(but not as bad as your hangover breath. Here's a mint, deadmouth)

Runaway Crane + Minivan + Bus + Police Cruiser = Big Ass Mess:

There was broken glass and pointy things everywhere. Glass? Who gives a shit about glass?

A robust young, West Virginia Redneck belts out his version of POISON's 'Every Rose Has Its Thorn':

Somewhere, in the back of a tour bus, Bret Michaels is watching this and weeping. We know, because we sent it to the fucker.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:



Celebrity Flat Ass In Jeans Alert - Oh WHO could it be? (Drunken Stepfather)

OK, here's a clue: she doesn't show her can often *Cough* KNOCKED UP *cough*, but when she DOES... ooga booga.

Christiano Ronaldo's Girlfriend Is A 10 (Banned In Hollywood)

25 Awesome Things Made Out of Beer Cans (Maxim)

Anna Lynn Cruz cruises right out of her lingerie, showing off her outstanding Latina loveliness (Freakshow Planet)

Girl Next Door: Wrenna Monet (Bullz-Eye)

Rare Footage of Kobe Bryant in High School Scoring 43 Points (The Hoop Doctors)

Mandy Lee steps into the tub and sheds her pesky, cumbersome bikini (z0d)

Possibly The Worlds Most Dangerous Theme Park (DJMICK)

If you woke up next to Susie Addison every morning, you'd never get out of bed. Ever. (Dailyniner)

9 Types of Fans You WILL Find at a Tailgate (The Campus Socialite)

The 15 Most Outlandish Wall Street Indulgences (BroBible)

I'M SORRY:
(Sorry that you'll be riding the coattails of your drinking buddy until you get booted out.)

Those nice boys in ALICE IN CHAINS played Madison Square Garden the other night:

William DuVall's afro was visible from the nosebleed section, incidentally. you can catch Alice In chains on the BLACKDIAMONDSKYE tour with MASTODON and DEFTONES.

Our longtime pal OZZY OSBOURNE is on tour for the next 18 months:

No wonder he yells at his fans so much; the man is overworked and C R A N K Y.

Tim 'Ripper' Owens was plucked out of obscurity to front JUDAS PRIEST:

...and then Rob Halford rejoined the band and Ripper is playing clubs with really low ceilings in Austria.

So, you want to wear tight pants, makeup, and rock out with your cock out? You're probably going to have to move to Sweden to do it:

THE POODLES are living proof that you can still be a glam-rocking dickbag... in Sweden.

From Rock, we segue right to Racks...

Despite her brief detour into mainstream acting, we'll always know SASHA GREY for her day job:

That girl sure can take a pounding... see for yourself... on demand, fools!!

Naturally-big-breasted Ava Addams and Jelena Jensen are groping one another fiercely:

There's nothing like busty women groping one another to throw off a creepy cameraman. You should see what happened next... that God Frenchy shut up.

Keeping with the big-ass-boobs theme, buxom Shay Laren is allergic to gold fabric. Her bikini happens to made of...Gold fabric:

We don't want Shay getting all itchy so ... guess which article of clothing Shay parted ways with?

As if we haven't already given you more boobies than you deserve, Leanne Crow and her Giant Juggs are sitting in an awful egg-shaped chair:

The only thing that could possibly improve this clip is a whole lot of bosom juggling...which fortunately for you, Leanne does. All girl with H-cup boobs should be required by law to juggle their bosoms.

...and that, kids... is the end of today's information-filled update....

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.