Runaway Crane vs. Police Car, Robust Redneck vs. POISON song, ALICE in CHAINS in NYC, OZZY in Italy, Ripper Owens in Tiny Clubs, The POODLES in tight pants, Sasha Grey topless montage, Big boob-fest with Shay Laren, Ava Addams, Leanne Crow, Jelena Jensen

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(but not as bad as your hangover breath. Here's a mint, deadmouth)

Runaway Crane + Minivan + Bus + Police Cruiser = Big Ass Mess:

There was broken glass and pointy things everywhere. Glass? Who gives a shit about glass?

A robust young, West Virginia Redneck belts out his version of POISON's 'Every Rose Has Its Thorn':

Somewhere, in the back of a tour bus, Bret Michaels is watching this and weeping. We know, because we sent it to the fucker.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:



Celebrity Flat Ass In Jeans Alert - Oh WHO could it be? (Drunken Stepfather)

OK, here's a clue: she doesn't show her can often *Cough* KNOCKED UP *cough*, but when she DOES... ooga booga.

Christiano Ronaldo's Girlfriend Is A 10 (Banned In Hollywood)

25 Awesome Things Made Out of Beer Cans (Maxim)

Anna Lynn Cruz cruises right out of her lingerie, showing off her outstanding Latina loveliness (Freakshow Planet)

Girl Next Door: Wrenna Monet (Bullz-Eye)

Rare Footage of Kobe Bryant in High School Scoring 43 Points (The Hoop Doctors)

Mandy Lee steps into the tub and sheds her pesky, cumbersome bikini (z0d)

Possibly The Worlds Most Dangerous Theme Park (DJMICK)

If you woke up next to Susie Addison every morning, you'd never get out of bed. Ever. (Dailyniner)

9 Types of Fans You WILL Find at a Tailgate (The Campus Socialite)

The 15 Most Outlandish Wall Street Indulgences (BroBible)

I'M SORRY:
(Sorry that you'll be riding the coattails of your drinking buddy until you get booted out.)

Those nice boys in ALICE IN CHAINS played Madison Square Garden the other night:

William DuVall's afro was visible from the nosebleed section, incidentally. you can catch Alice In chains on the BLACKDIAMONDSKYE tour with MASTODON and DEFTONES.

Our longtime pal OZZY OSBOURNE is on tour for the next 18 months:

No wonder he yells at his fans so much; the man is overworked and C R A N K Y.

Tim 'Ripper' Owens was plucked out of obscurity to front JUDAS PRIEST:

...and then Rob Halford rejoined the band and Ripper is playing clubs with really low ceilings in Austria.

So, you want to wear tight pants, makeup, and rock out with your cock out? You're probably going to have to move to Sweden to do it:

THE POODLES are living proof that you can still be a glam-rocking dickbag... in Sweden.

From Rock, we segue right to Racks...

Despite her brief detour into mainstream acting, we'll always know SASHA GREY for her day job:

That girl sure can take a pounding... see for yourself... on demand, fools!!

Naturally-big-breasted Ava Addams and Jelena Jensen are groping one another fiercely:

There's nothing like busty women groping one another to throw off a creepy cameraman. You should see what happened next... that God Frenchy shut up.

Keeping with the big-ass-boobs theme, buxom Shay Laren is allergic to gold fabric. Her bikini happens to made of...Gold fabric:

We don't want Shay getting all itchy so ... guess which article of clothing Shay parted ways with?

As if we haven't already given you more boobies than you deserve, Leanne Crow and her Giant Juggs are sitting in an awful egg-shaped chair:

The only thing that could possibly improve this clip is a whole lot of bosom juggling...which fortunately for you, Leanne does. All girl with H-cup boobs should be required by law to juggle their bosoms.

...and that, kids... is the end of today's information-filled update....

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

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be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Slingshot Orgasm in Malta, Montana Fishburne Arrested, SLASH's new Video, KORN live in Pittsburgh, Sasha Grey in Entourage, Joanna Bliss & Michelle Monaghan washing a car, McKenzee Miles topless in public

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Almost as bad as your taste in clothing, your friends, and your deodorant. What did you wear a skunk under each arm today?)

Peter's Girlfriend just had an outstanding Orgasm on the Slingshot ride in Malta:

Let's try to keep Peter away from the firearms, shall we?

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:


Montana Fishburne was Arrested for Assault (WWTDD)

Speaking of Montana Fishburne. we might as well mention the video...AGAIN

Montana Exposed - The Montana Fishburne Sex Tape (Vivid)


Kim Kardashian Post-Waxing Pose (Drunken Stepfather)

and as if we had to tell you again... here's Kim Kardashin mid and post-coitus... you see, cuz... she made a sex video.

Candice Cassidy thinks her pink satin bra is evil. So she's taken it off and destroyed it (Freakshow Planet)

Load up on guns and bring your friends: Twenty great action movie ensemble casts (Bullz-Eye)

The 10 Lamest Giant Godzilla Monsters (Fork Party)

The Girls of Lollapalooza (The Smoking Jacket)

POP-TARTS hitting the city harder than Ke$ha with a bottle of Jack (The Campus Socialite)

Dad Steals Son's Video Games, Sells Them, Attains "Douchebag" Status (Noob Dad)

Psst...someone tell Nikki Rhodes there's a camera pointed right up her skirt (Dailyniner)

20,000 Calories Of Real American News (UPROXX)

Blue Angel and Lauryn are having very Acrobatic Shower Sex (z0d)

Amazingly Life-like Robot Hand is Amazingly Terrifying (video) (GammaSquad)

I'M SORRY:
(So sorry your breath could send seagulls away from a Staten Island landfill)

Our buddy SLASH is on tour now (click for tickets), and in his new video he wants to be Carried 'Back From Cali':

However, Slash's tour has him in Denver... Someone get this man a Map.

Them fun guys in KORN hit Pittsburgh the other day:

...and they played "Got the Life" for a bunch of folks who don't have one... see, that's a joke. Ah-Boo.

Awwww shit... look what WE found...

Adult film starlet Sasha Grey, who is one of the least shy ladies we've met is now guest-starring on HBO's ENTOURAGE:

Of course, she's not exactly playing a nun. She's playing HERSELF...and she's doing full-frontal-nudity. Is Sasha Grey classing up ENTOURAGE, or is it the other way around?

Busty brunettes Joanna Bliss and Michelle Monaghan are washing a 'spensive sports car:

...and rubbing their enormous British & Romanian boobs together... because that's what you do when you're washing a car, evidently.

23 year-old blond hottie McKenzee Miles is flashing in public, because she's what is commonly referred to as 'a good egg':

Pumpin' Gas, Goin' shoppin', and babbling about...something... and showing off her boobies. the full clip is a helluva lot more graphic...which we totally appreciate and endorse.

Janelle is a curvy, 23 year-old Latina with exotic green eyes DD-sized breasts, and an ass-tastic hiney that fits perfectly in a tiny thong. We sent Janelle one of our HUGE old-school FoundryMusic T-Shirts, and she wore it for a few seconds, then tossed it aside in favor of fishnet stockings and pink panties. We have ZERO objection to this behavior, and we'll continue to encourage it.
Thanks to our Boston boys in EXTREME for the song "King of the Ladies".



Click the pic. Rub your...(oh, now that's just not neccessary, is it?) then head on over to FOUNDRY CAMS and chat with Janelle LIVE (she'll be wearing next-to-nothing. You wear whatever the hell you want, amigo)

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Rapper hit by Ice Cream Truck, Montana Fishburne in a Music Video & Sex Tape, ROB ZOMBIE is still pissed at OZZY, IRON MAIDEN live in NYC, Sasha Grey and Veronika Zemanova get Naked

It's time for that mid-week fling, so clock out early and take a flirty co-worker to a local motel...

"Hump day" rolls off the tongue better than "Take a flirty co-worker to a local motel Day" and that's why the Greeks called it 'hump day' day in the first place. Yes, it was the Greeks. You think we just make this shit up?

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Almost as terrible as your breath, clothes and hairline. It's a trifecta of 'Awful' Poolboy!)

If you're dumb enough to dance backwards into traffic, then you probably deserve to get smacked by an ice cream truck:

Just like this brilliant 26 year-old rapper who sauntered his way into traffic singing his own songs.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:


Montana Fishburne's Sex Tape is getting Bumped up (WWTDD)

We say 'Thank you' to the nice folks at Vivid Entertainment for Bringing the Montana Fishburne Sex Tape to Market... Excellent work, folks!

Speaking of the lovely Montana Fishburne, she's about to win the Nobel Prize for 'Disappointing Daddy' with her cameo in Brian Pumper's new rap video:

This li'l ditty is affectionately called "Oh and It's Shaved". It's about umm... shaving?


guess who's all growed up and getting naked in the movies? (Drunken Stepfather)

You want a hint? Hmm... Run, Forrest! Ruuuun!... Dead giveaway? Damn.

The Ten Most Notorious Nerd Queens (Gunaxin)

Drunken Internet Distractions (College Humor)

Alexis Ford has the Cadillac of Hineys (Freakshow Planet)

Girl Next Door: Jaime Young (Bullz-Eye)

IHC imagines The Expendables in the decade it should have happened: The 1980s (I Heart Chaos)

Alisha King is wearing an old-school fedora...and that's it. (Dailyniner)

20 Great TV Ad Campaigns for 20 Great Beers (BroBible)

Alexis Texas shows her young blond friend all about southern hospitality (z0d)


I'M SORRY:
(So sorry you have yet to develop a skill set beyond that of a shit-shoveler)

Someone is holding a grudge, aren't they? ROB ZOMBIE was being interviewed backstage at the Rockstar Energy Drink Mayhem Festival and ripped OZZY OSBOURNE...again:

Rob doesn't take too kindly to Ozzy taking his band members. second slam in a month, dammit.

...and when he's NOT pissed off ROB ZOMBIE makes happy music...well, depending on your definition of 'Happy':

Mo' Human 'den Human, mudderfuggers.

Holy crap. Who knew New York City had so many Headbangers? IRON MAIDEN is on tour now (click for them tix)...and they packed Madison Square Garden:

Manhattan Metalheads... Who knew?

From metal... we segue onto...MELONS!

Sultry skinny adult mega-starlet Sasha Grey can't get out of her skirt fast enough:

Sasha Grey is one of the few adult stars who can make THIS kind of smutty goodness and then go on to make mainstream films lke 'The Girlfriend Experience'

Busty Czech beauty Veronika Zemanova was born into poverty:

What better reason to use your fantastic female form to lift yourself out of the poorhouse.

Holy. Moley. Our Italian a beautiful young lady from FOUNDRY CAMS girl Dannie Gee or Danni G did a great job tearing up and re-working our old-school FoundryMusic T-shirt, and shaking her ass to "Kick in The Teeth" by PAPA ROACH from their upcoming album Time For Annihilation..On the Road, and On The Record:


Pick yourself up off the floor, wipe the drool off your chest...and then Head on over to FOUNDRY CAMS and Chat with Danni Gee/Danni G LIVE...and NUUUUDE (uh, yeah...we mean HER. Not you)

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Soccer Hooligans Brawl, Most Painful Tattoo, Lady Gaga Is Friendly, STONE TEMPLE PILOTS on Letterman, ALICE IN CHAINS live in New York, Busty Ellen and Sasha Von Get Nude

Oh hell yeah, it's FRIDAY!
Go out this weekend and fornicate with a two friendly ...and promiscuous gals:

Screw 'Miller time'...it's 'affair time'...Beer is for college kids. Booze and Adultery is for grown-ups.

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Kind of like chili and beer farts, but only worse, because they're coming out of you)

The fights that break out AFTER a soccer game are often more entertaining than the games themselves:


This brawl happens to be between a bunch of Mexicans and Angolans in Houston, TX

Honey, if your pain threshold is THIS low...


you just might want to reconsider getting that tattoo.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:


Lady Gaga Sure is Friendly (WWTDD)


Holy Shit! Ghost!!! (Drunken Stepfather)

Oh wait, sorry... it's just Mischa Barton. Wearing WAY too much makeup.

July 5th is Everybody Draw Titties on Jesus Day! (FunnyCrave)

The Future of Peeing (UPROXX)

On a scale of 1 to 10, Heather Vandeven is...an Eleven (Freakshow Planet)

A chat with porn star Sasha Grey (Bullz-Eye)

Jamie and Breanne go nipple-to-nipple in this Military Photo Shoot (Dailyniner)

Go To Bed With A TEN Wake Up With A TWO. (Campus Socialite)

K900 Hybrid Grill: Think of it as a Sports Car For Your Patio (The Bachelor Guy)

Jenn Anh Nguyen's Boobs are SO big, she has to hold them up so they don't fall off (z0d)

You had me at "Joe Pesci plays a pimp" (FilmDrunk)

The Walking Dead Are Coming, Grab an Axe (Dave and Thomas)

21 Animals Riding Other Animals (Maxim)


I'M SORRY:
(Sorry all the breath mints on the planet won't clear up that halitosis of yours)

You know, when Scott Weiland is coherent and not falling down, STONE TEMPLE PILOTS is a pretty great band live:

again, we stress...when Weiland is coherent. How often is that? Ehhh, we dunno.

The guys in ALICE IN CHAINS are on tour now (click for tickets!) and this is their gig in Glens Falls, NY:

METALLICA. Napster Bad. iTunes Good. Oof, how old is THAT line?

From grunge bands to great big boobies...

ultra-buxom Busty Ellen is wearing a plaid bra...but not for long:

You see when you have 34G-sized boobs, you're morally obligated to take your clothes off and play with yourself...because your country wants you to. No matter what country you're from.

hard-bodied Sasha Von can't get nude fast enough:

and who could blame her? she's working on her site to pay her way through school... so more naked = more college!

What's this? More fantastic shamless self-promotion?? INDEED!

You know Carmen from her many FOUNDRY CAMS videos and from her solo site - CamWithCarmen. Here's a great clip of her "Unraveling" her clothes to some music by our friends in SEVENDUST:


CLICK THE PIC TO SEE CARMEN STRIP!

Then, when the feeling returns in your arms and legs... chat with Carmen LIVE, one-on-one!

You can also get hundreds of new photos and videos at Carmen's solo site - CamWithCarmen

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Monday Links: MLK Day Madness, Exploding Wine Box, Night Ranger and All Star NAMM Jam, Golden Globes Hilarity, Carmella Bing and Sasha Cane

It's MLK Day and we're doing exactly what the good doctor would have wanted. We think.

It's Just what you were waiting for Bam Margera and Gina Lynn. Together. At. Last.



Get 'FantASStic Whores 4' now...classy, right?

Read up on all of our ass-tastic reviews - online in the SHOP section. We'll be adding up more every day!



THAT's TERRIBLE:

A box of wine is a fancy beverage for fancy people. What happens when you put one in a cheap Microwave oven?




Don't buy a Microwave and DON'T blow shit up in it. That's just silly.

THAT's NOT-SO TERRIBLE:

(but your sour puss is. How's about removing it with a kitchen knife?)





Which award-winning actress hit the Golden Globes looking like Bigfoot in a dress? (WWTDD)




Mischa Barton has a new gig
(Drunken Stepfather)



who wants to see Mischa Barton's ta-ta's?!?! *raises hand*



Bryleigh Rayne is trying to play shy. It's not working (z0d)





Girl Next Door: Cristy Mendevil (Bullz-Eye)



Georgia and Jana are touching tongues...and that's not all! (Daily Niner)



The Women of 24...All of them (FunnyCrave)



Veronica Saint...is no saint. We just thought of that. (FreakshowPlanet)



Hoops for Haiti Raises over $1 Million for Charity (Buster Sports)



Umbrellas, Tyson, and Blue People: The 2010 Golden Globe (Yep Yep)



Mariah Carey's Cleavage would not be denied (Don Chavez)



The 10 Dumbest Things Billy Bush Said Last Night at the Golden Globes (FilmDrunk)



15 Rock Stars that Went Off the Deep End (Fork Party)

I'M SORRY:

(Sorry that you think your grudge-holding skills could win you a Nobel Prize. If the Swedes gave those out, that is.)

Busty brunette adul starlet Carmella Bing is showing off her Double-D Cups:



Being topless makes knob-gobbling so much easier.

Sexy, sultry, surgically-augmented Sasha Cane rides the stripper pole in he VIP room:



There's a lot more going on after the jump...drool bib, time.

When you close your eyes, do you dream about NIGHT RNAGER?



We thought you might. That's why we posted this clip from this weekend's jam at NAMM.

Speaking of NAMM, here's Don Dokken, Carmine Appice, Paul Gilbert, Doug Aldrich, and Uli Jon Roth doing the CREAM classic "Sunshine Of Your Love":



You should be Rockin' with Dokken. Everyone else is. Seriously.

Blond, BISEXUAL Lizzy from FOUNDRY CAMS has a lot of tattoos. That's an understatement. Thanks to our buds in SwampDaWamp for giving us the song "Lady".






CLICK ON THOSE TATTOOED TA-TA's!

Take a break from hitting on the lonely MILF next door, and recap what we added to the MEDIA SECTION, including:



Exploding Box Of Wine in a Microwave

NIGHT RANGER: "When You Close Your Eyes" Acoustic LIVE at NAMM

Sasha Cane Rides the Stripper Pole

All Star Namm Jam - 'Sunshine Of Your Love' - LIVE at NAMM

Carmella Bing Busts out her DD Cups

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?


FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing



Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates



be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep



We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.



We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.



We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.



FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.