Drunk Cab Fight, Beaten & Run Over, Jessica Simpson on Entourage, Christina Nude in GQ, Video Preview of OZZY's new CD, SLASH and Adam Levine LIVE, Booty and Boobies with Alexis Texas and Rachel Aldana

Happy Wednesday, or 'Hump day' as the Swedes refer to it as... so stop making copies of your assistant's ass and bring her to a motel

After all what is 'Hump Day' without 'Humping'?...Exactly. It's boring.

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Like the lingering stench of body odor and farts you leave behind in every room)

Drunk guys start fight for the dumbest reasons...


...and sometimes in the dumbest places... like a taxi cab.

Getting your ass kicked + Getting Run Over + Getting it videotaped and thrown all over the internet...


...is pretty much the 'Trifecta of Embarrassing'... what a lousy day this guy is having.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:


Jessica Simpson Taped a Scene in 'Entourage' (WWTDD)

oofah... remember when Jessica slimmed down for 'Dukes of Hazzard'?...good times.


Christina Naked in GQ...thank you. (Drunken Stepfather)

Even though Christina's Never Been Shy about Showing off her body before, she's a MILF now...

Top 10 Things Not To Say During A One Night Stand (The Campus Socialite)

16 Reasons Why Sports and Music Should Not Procreate (UPROXX)

PLAYBOY's Teri Harrison is Totally Naked on the Kitchen Counter...hopefully it was cleaned first (Freakshow Planet)

Gisele Bundchen poses for the Hope lingerie company (Celebrity Teaser)

Amber Nicole... Two Great Names and Two Great Ta-Ta's (Dailyniner)

10 singers in successful bands who really aren’t all that good (Guyism)

A Practical Guide to Hiding Your Friend’s Porn Stash (FunnyCrave)

Koopa's Hell (College Humor)

Nichole Heiress Inherited a Whole Pile of Sexy (z0d)

15 Of the Best Film Bullies (Gunaxin)


I'M SORRY:
(Sorry that there isn't a toothpaste strong enough to clean those awful teeth of yours)

Our buddy our pal OZZY OSBOURNE has released a five minute-long video preview of his upcoming album Scream (click to pre-order!):

'Scream' will be released on June 22, but you can pre-order online now

The Ellen Degeneres Show was actually watchable the other day. SLASH and Adam Levine from MAROON 5 made a li'l appearance:

SLASH's new album is available now, and it's got more guest appearances than a Jerry Lewis Telethon! (oh MAN that was a bad one)

From Rocks to Racks...

Ass-tastic adult starlet Alexis Texas is oiling up that masterpiece hiney of hers:

And oiling it up is only the foreplay to the ass-pounding she gets in BIG WET ASSES 14 on-demand now!

Busty British Bombshell Rachel Aldana is sporting the luckiest sweater EVER:

and we mean that it's very tight and her L-Cup Boobs blast out of it FAST, thereby making it 'Lucky'.

and since we like shameless self-promotion as much as the next fella

Here's Samantha in one of our official FoundryMusic T-Shirts shaking her ass to "Satisfied" by SOCIAL CODE:

CLICK THE PIC TO SEE SAMANTHA's SEXY STRIP!
(well it almost rhymes)

Then, when you have some motor function back... chat with Samantha LIVE, one-on-one, on her cam!

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

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FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

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