Groupies RULE, Zakk Wylde and William Shatner, gratuitous drum solo, OZZY on TV, SLASH on Lopez Tonight, Big Booty and Bigger Bra Sizes

Being famous certainly has its perks, but what do all the groupies do when there are no celebrities around?

Glad you asked! They troll around online looking for strangers to have uncommitted flings with

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Just like your bald spot. Want the number of a good wig store?)

William Shatner has recruited none other than ZAKK WYLDE to perform on his cover of ... "IRON MAN"?:

We don't agree with it at all. We UNDERSTAND it...but we don't agree with it.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:

(but your constant craving for attention IS. Weren't you hugged as a child?)

Normally we wouldn't care about Amber Heard, but she's looking great in Esquire (Drunken Stepfather)

we appreciate Amber Heard even more now that we've seen her naked scenes

Malibu is named after a city AND a beverage. Thank God she wasn't named "Bayonne" (FreakShow Planet)

11 Movies for 2011 (Bullz-Eye)

Brittany Bardot is dressed like a schoolgirl, but she's anything other than that (Dailyniner)

Cali Lakai. Awful Name. Amazing Body (z0d)



I'M SORRY:
(Sorry that your temper, attitude and disposition make you unfit to hold any other job except 'house boy')

...and now for your gratuitos drum solo of the day, here's Frankie Banali from QUIET RIOT:

QUIET RIOT is totally re-formed with a new singer because... well, because their original singer... is uhh... dead.

A surprisingly lucid OZZY OSBOURNE appeared on Good Day L.A.:

Amazing what a lack of chemicals in the body will do to a person.

SLASH was on LOPEZ TONIGHT playing the ROLLING STONES classic "Brown Sugar":

Eh, not many. One, maybe? Can you even call the band THIN LIZZY at this point.

From metal, we saunter gently over to the mammaries...nice segue, right?

Busty blondes Kayla Cupcakes and Summer Sin filled up the whole camera with their massive hooters:

...and if not for the obnoxious cameraman, this clip would be perfect.

...and now for today's lecture on rocket science...

...No, not really. We lied. It's Brooke Lee Adams and Ava Rose showing off their big booty. That's kind of like rocket science, isn't it?



...and that, as they say, is the way the cookie crumbles... Now go have a good cry and drink yourself unconscious

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Nicolas Cage Rage Montage, QUIET RIOT re-formed, OZZY OSBOURNE re-charged, Brandy Talore, Flower Tucci, and Raylene Richards all show off their slut-tacular-ness

Make it a special weekend! spend it locked in a hotel room with a married person you JUST met:

Sounds like fun, right? Adultery. It's for adults... and 20-somethings that got married way too young.

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Just like your girthy chunky butt. Here's a free gym membership. Use it.)

Did you ever notice how often NICOLAS CAGE loses his mind in movies?

if not, this montage of classic 'Cage Rage' will give you a really good idea.


THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:


We don't care if her music stinks...check out those boobies! (Drunken Stepfather)


A chat with David Hasselhoff (Bullz-Eye)

Got pregnant? Got Fat? You Gotta Get this book! (Muscle Sorority)

Gina B has all the B's we can think of: Boobs, Booty, Blond Hair, and Boy-oh-Boy do we want to jump on her (FreakShow Planet)

Juelz Ventura is tattooed, tight, and totally topless (z0d)

Dylan Ryder is reading filthy magazines and plaing with her boobs... which is what we wish were doing too (Dailyniner)

I'M SORRY:
(Sorry to hear that you're still blaming all of your problems on other people. Way to grow up, ya nut.)

Oh, so what if the rest of your bandmates are either dead or dislike you... that's no reason NOT to reform a band like QUIET RIOT, right? Um, right?

It's drummer Frankie Banali and... some guys... playing a bar... in Colorado.

s

On the complete opposite end of the popularity spectrum, OZZY OSBOURNE touring the world, in arenas, with band members half his age.

yeah, Grizzly Bar in Colorado and Madison Square Garden...same thing, really... Uhh, no.

...OK, dats enough o' dat. Let's see some girls!

The gal with the robust boobs is back adult starlet BRANDY TALORE can't stop feeling up her massive rack:

Not that we blame her. If we had boobs like that, we'd play with them all the time too... and you'll never guess what happens when the dopey camera guy shuts up and Brandy is allowed to enjoy some time with a lucky fella.

Squirt-master supreme Flower TUcci is giving Nicole Banks a full body-cavity search in this clip:

as if that isn't enough, a lucky bank robber gets serviced by the two ladies... which is really the way all bank robberies should go... We think so anyway.

She goes by many names, but Raylene Richards is the kind of gal you want to see strip naked right in front of you:

Thanks to some guys much smarter than us, we have a cool program that will do just that!

Our pal and buxom blond Gisele, who you have seen in countless FOUNDRY CAMS videos as well as her own site GOT GISELE, has returned to help us promote Retooled, the new FOUNDRY EP, available at all major online outlets. In the clip, Gisele makes some creative use out of a long shiny black light, while shaking her semi-clothed body to FOUNDRY's "Black Lights, Bright City" (Retooled by Rich DeCicco).
Thanks to Rich for the great remake. Thanks to Jon for the amazing editing, and thanks to Gisele for the rockin' bod.



Click on Gisele's impressive rack, then rock out with some FOUNDRY.
When your jaw stops swinging open, Go visit her at Got Gisele
...you can also Chat with Gisele LIVE on her cam

...and that, kids... is how we wrap up today's big-ass-salad of funs....

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.