HUGE update for people looking to waste a PILE of time: Trick Or Treat Trailer, OZZY on Sobriety, Carmen's Cans, Zakk Wylde on American Idol, Lemmy on stage with SLASH

and now for a close-up of the late Lon Chaney's testicles...you know you want to see it.


Yo mang! Whassup! This be some coo' shizz, yo
You follow US on twitter and we follow YOU on twitter. Simple enough, right? and YES, we DO follow you. To the post office, to the grocery store, etc...
- Follow this one and we'll keep you up to date on all the children we keep in cages...KIDDING!
- Now Follow this one (we'll keep you up to date on what all the girlies are doing)

Your mom is SO fed up with your old man's antics that she's pushing his Mustang into a pond:

How do we know this? we found it in her personal ad... Hell hath no fury, dude.

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Same as the way you say mean things under your breath, thinking no one will notice. Of course everyone DOES)

Here are some prophetic words of wisdom from a once non-sober OZZY OSBOURNE:

Yes, it does indeed S U C K. Unless you think getting out of bed to make poo is gross.

Amazing documentary. Highly reccommended. Yes, by US. Sheesh.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:

(Unlike your feet, which smell like you walked through elephant shit)

and now, the movie that proved that playing your records backwards was ALWAYS a bad idea - TRICK OR TREAT

You know Skippy from FAMILY TIES was in this, right? Oh yeah, Gene Simmons and OZZY OSBOURNE too.

Yes, playing your records backwards raises dead rock stars from the dead. God, do we have to explain it all?.

Jennifer Lawrence ... is umm... not related to Martin Lawrence or Joey Lawrence:

In fact, we have no F-ing idea who she is. So there.

Nevaeh. Raina Lee. Touching Tongues. That is all. Resume clicking (FreakShow Planet)

2011 Volvo S60 T6 AWD Car Review (Bullz-Eye)

5 More Rom-Com Sequels We'd Like to See (After When Harry Met Sally 2) (How About We)

I'm Ashamed to be a Boston Sports Fan (MadeMan)

lisa Niels is wearing pants that don't fit. Thankfully she doesn't keep them on for long (z0d)

Sandee Westgate has brown hair and a big-ass tattoo on her ribs. When did this shit happen? (Daily Niner)

I'M SORRY:
(Sorry your taste in women is like your taste in clothing; cheesy, beat up, and worn out)

Anyone see a little show called American Idol last night?

You should check it out. See, it's like a talent show / karaoke contest. There's celebrity judges... oh yeah, and ZAKK F*CKING WYLDE.

Zakk has a little band thing he does on the side...sha-boom.

The fact that Johnny Solinger from SKID ROW can cook is fairly... uhhh, meh.

The fact that he can chug a bottle of tequila near a hot stove and open flame? NOw THAT folks, is entertainment!

See, Johnny is the guy who came into the band after they re-formed...he's not Sebastian Bach, but that has more to do with D.N.A., you know?

Yes, that's Lemmy from MOTORHEAD and his prune-sized liver on stage with SLASH in Argentina.

Does the ol' Lem even HAVE a liver anymore? Sucker drinks an awful lot of Jack Daniels, yaknowwhatImean, mang?

If you haven't seen the Lemmy movie yet, then ... well, you're just a doo-doo brain. Yup. I said it. Doo-Doo brain.

We just thought this was some cool video, so we put it up.

Well, that and we thought a testicle-angle video of Corey Taylor from STONE SOUR was good enough to post.

Someone asked me if I had the new STONE SOUR disc the other day. I yelled "Yes!"...and then slapped him with a fresh haddock.

OK, time to bring out the beeeeeyotches, yo

What is it with girls like Danni Kaliforniaand these enormous bottles of baby oil?

Is their skin that scaly? It certainly must be, because they use an awful lot of it.

our girl Carmen who you have seen in dozens of FOUNDRY CAMS videos... made um...this:

You can catch Carmen each and every night LIVE at FOUNDRY CAMS! ...aaaaaand roll credits.

Speaking of FOUNDRY CAMS, we felt it needed a facelift, so we made a whole nifty new page at over here now...

We totally revamped FOUNDRY CAMS, with a new domain, hotter girls, lower prices, and a better user experience. So far, the response has beeen HUGE. Check it out:


and if you feel like following us on Twitter (we'll keep you up to date on what all the girlies are doing)

Click it, fool!

Speaking of FOUNDRY CAMS check out what WE got from GISELE:
The lovely blonde Gisele, who you have seen in dozens of FOUNDRY CAMS videos, is back at it once again with a hosed-down FoundryMusic T-shirt, high heels, and very little else on. She's shaking her perfectly-formed hiney to FOUNDRY's "Ain't Like You" from the RETOOLED album, mixed by Rich DeCicco and featuring our buddy Rob Balducci on guitar. Thanks as always to Jon for the editing.

Buy FOUNDRY: Retooled now at Amazon:



Watch Video. Click Photo. Enjoy Gisele. Simple, right? (you'd be shocked how many people fuck that up)

...and that, friends... is the way to make salsa in woodchipper.

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Groupies RULE, Zakk Wylde and William Shatner, gratuitous drum solo, OZZY on TV, SLASH on Lopez Tonight, Big Booty and Bigger Bra Sizes

Being famous certainly has its perks, but what do all the groupies do when there are no celebrities around?

Glad you asked! They troll around online looking for strangers to have uncommitted flings with

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Just like your bald spot. Want the number of a good wig store?)

William Shatner has recruited none other than ZAKK WYLDE to perform on his cover of ... "IRON MAN"?:

We don't agree with it at all. We UNDERSTAND it...but we don't agree with it.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:

(but your constant craving for attention IS. Weren't you hugged as a child?)

Normally we wouldn't care about Amber Heard, but she's looking great in Esquire (Drunken Stepfather)

we appreciate Amber Heard even more now that we've seen her naked scenes

Malibu is named after a city AND a beverage. Thank God she wasn't named "Bayonne" (FreakShow Planet)

11 Movies for 2011 (Bullz-Eye)

Brittany Bardot is dressed like a schoolgirl, but she's anything other than that (Dailyniner)

Cali Lakai. Awful Name. Amazing Body (z0d)



I'M SORRY:
(Sorry that your temper, attitude and disposition make you unfit to hold any other job except 'house boy')

...and now for your gratuitos drum solo of the day, here's Frankie Banali from QUIET RIOT:

QUIET RIOT is totally re-formed with a new singer because... well, because their original singer... is uhh... dead.

A surprisingly lucid OZZY OSBOURNE appeared on Good Day L.A.:

Amazing what a lack of chemicals in the body will do to a person.

SLASH was on LOPEZ TONIGHT playing the ROLLING STONES classic "Brown Sugar":

Eh, not many. One, maybe? Can you even call the band THIN LIZZY at this point.

From metal, we saunter gently over to the mammaries...nice segue, right?

Busty blondes Kayla Cupcakes and Summer Sin filled up the whole camera with their massive hooters:

...and if not for the obnoxious cameraman, this clip would be perfect.

...and now for today's lecture on rocket science...

...No, not really. We lied. It's Brooke Lee Adams and Ava Rose showing off their big booty. That's kind of like rocket science, isn't it?



...and that, as they say, is the way the cookie crumbles... Now go have a good cry and drink yourself unconscious

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Sport Bike vs. Car, DUKE NUKEM FOREVER, STRYPER and CHRIS JERICHO covering badly, Zakk Wylde on Californication, Mariah Milano and Mary Carey Showing off...again

Studies have shown that more women than men are carrying on torrid affairs:

...and this is bad...why, exactly? Exactly. It's not bad at all.

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Just like your breath, receding hairline, and attitude in general)

yeah, um... there's a reason for those solid yellow lines.

it's so you DON'T cross them and nail an oncoming motorcycle.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:

(but your face makes us want to puke...)

Blood. Guts. Purple Strippers? Indeed. The trailer for DUKE NUKEM FOREVER has hit the web!

Yes, it should have been released ten years ago. Finally, it's coming.

Amanda Seyfried isn't nearly as repellent as we once thought (Drunken Stepfather)

You might actually know this one...if you're into the muscular girls.. and if you're not, then you'll never ever guess this one.

Zdenka... difficult to pronounce. Very easy on the eyes. (FreakShow Planet)

Bullz-Eye Interviews the cast and crew from "Spartacus" (Bullz-Eye)

Yurizan and Phoenix are getting awfully friendly...awfully (Dailyniner)

Jordan Brigden is the kind of gal we'd like to take out for a malted (z0d)



I'M SORRY:
(Sorry that you keep getting passed over for that promotion, dickbag)

STRYPER brought out CHRIS JERICHO to sing some SCORPIONS... off key:

We USED to like Jericho. He should stick to FOZZY. STRYPER has a new album called 'The Covering'

Dingy-looking rocker ZAKK WYLDE showed up on Showtime's original series CALIFORNICATION...and played...a dingy-looking rocker:

...at least he didn't play one of Duchovny's girlfriends.

From bikers and bands to boobs and such...

Curvy brunette MILF Mariah Milano is peeling off her pink panties and you get to see it all:

There's equal amounts of silicone and flesh on that woman.

Our buddy our pal Mary Carey is out by her pool...again. She's feeling herself up...again:

We're starting to wonder if that's ALL she does. Hell if we looked like she does, we'd be massaging ourselves all day long.



...and that, as they say, is that. Now scram. Somewhere, someone is making more money than you are...

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Scooter smacked by car, New & Old Victoria Silvstedt, Mystery Nips, Five Finger Death Punch on Kimmel, Zakk Wylde Wank-tastic Gutiar Playing, Ashlynn Brooke, Robin Andersen

Why did the ancient Egyptians call Wednesday "Hump Day"? probably because of all the mid-day sex the Pharaohs were having... Nice, right? A Pharaoh reference...

It's a centuries-old tradition, so take that horny co-worker of yours to a local motel and soil the sheets. more than they already HAVE been, we mean.

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(but not nearly as bad as your self-esteem. How DO you make it through the day without slitting your wrists?)

Thanks to the wonder of the dashboard-mounted camera, we get to see another dummy on a scooter get wrecked:

Why would you pull in front of a car THEN hit the brakes? You're gonna need a new scooter, mister.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:


Victoria Silvstedt in a Bikini (WWTDD)

You know, Victoria was the 1997 Playmate of the Year


Saaaay, who's got the rock hard nips going on? (Drunken Stepfather)

You wouldn't believe it if we told you So we're just gonna give you a hint: Big Forehead, Wednesday Addams, Black Snake M---. Wait. too much again, right?

“True Blood” Gets Naked And Bloody For Rolling Stone (The Frisky)

Erika Mayshawn is just the right amount of cream for our coffee...and probably yours too (Freakshow Planet)

Featured Model: Stephanie Farris (Bullz-Eye)

XBOX Girls Get Revenge (College Humor)

Lindsey Lohan in Maxim September 2010 vs. Lindsey Lohan in Maxim September 2007 (BroBible)

ProStars: The Unseen Episodes (Sports Pickle)

The Five-Step Guide to Making Your Room Pop (The Campus Socialite)

Lingerie Football League Star Goes “Full Nerd” (Gunaxin)

Madison Scott Couldn't wait to get out of that bulky pink sun dress (Dailyniner)

Pre Season Football, The 1st Cousin of Non Alcoholic Beer (New York Pudding)

Jessica Hall is Toned, Tan, and ... um, wait.. what were we saying? (z0d)

8 of the Dirtiest Sexual Innuendos in Children's Cartoons (Asylum)

How Pam Anderson's lady parts are similar to M. Night Shyamalan (FilmDrunk)

I'M SORRY:
(So sorry the only women that you can pick up are hungover stragglers from last night's pool party)

Those cheerful guys in FIVE FINGER DEATH PUNCH were on Jimmy Kimmel Live playing their cover of "Bad Company"

For a cover song, it's not too shabby.... Download some FIVE FINGER DEATH PUNCH now, dammit.

Zakk Wylde and BLACK LABEL SOCIETY played The Roxy in Hollywood and of cousrse...

... Zakk did the obligatory masturbatory guitar solo midway through the song, "Fire It Up".

and from metal, we segue into mammaries...

Lovely little Ashlynn Brooke is an Oklahoma-born 'good egg':

Which is just another way of saying she has NO problem flinging her lace lingerie to the floor.

Shapely young Playboy hottie Robin Andersen has no need for pesky clothing:

After a boring-as-watching-grass-grow interview Robin finally gives us something to look at.

Speaking of PLABOY, You remember Victoria Silvstedt, don't you? You SHOULD. We just linked to her a few minutes ago. Sheesh.:

Victoria was Playboy's 1997 Playmate of the Year...and that, friends...is nothing to fling boogers at. She's STILL amazing looking, even at 35.

Emi, who has been featured in other FOUNDRY CAMS clips, is once again shaking her tattooed tail in tribute to "Tattoos & Tequila" by VINCE NEIL of MOTLEY CRUE. We wanted her to drink Vince Neil's Tres Rios Tequila while she made this clip, but after thinking it through, we realized no one wanted to see a clip of a giggling tattooed chick falling down.


Click on Emi's very large tattoo, enjoy some Tequila if you'd like, then head on over to FOUNDRY CAMS and chat with Emi LIVE (try not to get too wasted; you don't want any of that drunk-typing happening)

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

The Next Three Days Trailer, Snooki's Ass is Awful, Zakk Wylde is Sober and Playing Better, Night Ranger in Jersey, Jana Defi, Angel Kiss, Devyn Devine, Tattoos, Tequila, and Foundry Cams

Blech. Monday. Hangovers. Hotel Bills and having your wife wake up the sleeping young lady you spent the weekend with... don't worry, your wife was in on it.

Love, honor, cherish, till death... sure. Threesomes are the best part about being married. Just make sure your wife picks the girl, you know?

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(but not nearly as bad as your self-esteem. How DO you make it through the day without slitting your wrists?)

Let's see.... Russell Crowe, Elizabeth Banks, and a very Noo-Yawk-ified Liam Neeson:

It's called The Next Three Days. Anyone else smell farts?

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:


Snooki's Ass is Awful (WWTDD)

Speaking of wanna-be famous people, let's plug the Montana Fishburne video... for the last time!

Montana Exposed - The Montana Fishburne Sex Tape (Vivid)


Whose boobs love attention? (Drunken Stepfather)

If you don't know her yet... you'll see her naked ass in 'Piranha 3D'... there, that was a hint, right?

Jelena Jensen couldn't wait to get inside to play with herself. What WILL the neighbors think? (Freakshow Planet)

2010 Fantasy Football Preview (Bullz-Eye)

How to make your house as dangerous as possible (The Noob Dad)

Chinese Woman Invades Pitch, Chases And Attacks Referee (DJMICK)

Amazing Karaoke Video Personal Ad (Heavy)

Scott Pilgrim vs. The World: The Game (The Campus Socialite)

Women Flash Breasts To Rob Very Happy Victim (UPROXX)

Dylan Rider is Riding the luckiest Red Couch EVER (Dailyniner)

5 Famous Guys Who Slid Way Down the Food Chain to Cheat (The Smoking Jacket)

Krystal Web is wearing gold panties and pink shoes. Thank God she doesn't keep them on for long (z0d)

Haters Gonna Hate Guy IRL (NextRound)

Mad Men: Just the Badass Parts (GammaSquad)

I'M SORRY:
(So sorry the only women that you can pick up are hungover stragglers from last night's pool party)

ZAKK WYLDE minus Booze = Much more gooder guitar playing in BLACK LABEL SOCIETY:

BLACK LABEL SOCIETY is playing OZZFEST and a ton of other dates (get them tickets now, ma'am!).

You wouldn't think it, but NIGHT RANGER can still rock in America:

... or New Jersey, at least. That's kinda the armpit of America.

From Rock, we segue gently into...racks!

Czech hotness Jana Defi is getting all clean and spending a lot of time on her boobies:

DO boobs really get THAT dirty, or is ... oh, wait. We get it.

So you like big boobies, do ya, Lloyd? Check out Devyn Devine... who ain't exactly Dainty:

Some guys like barbie doll-lookin' chicks. some guys like a lot more cushion when they're pushin'.

What does Angel Kiss have in common with a 1973 Buick?

Nothing. Zip. Zero. except that neither of them fit into a tiny purple garter...and even that's a stretch.

Emi, who has been featured in other FOUNDRY CAMS clips, is once again shaking her tattooed tail in tribute to "Tattoos & Tequila" by VINCE NEIL of MOTLEY CRUE. We wanted her to drink Vince Neil's Tres Rios Tequila while she made this clip, but after thinking it through, we realized no one wanted to see a clip of a giggling tattooed chick falling down.


Click on Emi's very large tattoo, enjoy some Tequila if you'd like, then head on over to FOUNDRY CAMS and chat with Emi LIVE (try not to get too wasted; you don't want any of that drunk-typing happening)

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.