Drunk Cab Fight, Beaten & Run Over, Jessica Simpson on Entourage, Christina Nude in GQ, Video Preview of OZZY's new CD, SLASH and Adam Levine LIVE, Booty and Boobies with Alexis Texas and Rachel Aldana

Happy Wednesday, or 'Hump day' as the Swedes refer to it as... so stop making copies of your assistant's ass and bring her to a motel

After all what is 'Hump Day' without 'Humping'?...Exactly. It's boring.

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Like the lingering stench of body odor and farts you leave behind in every room)

Drunk guys start fight for the dumbest reasons...


...and sometimes in the dumbest places... like a taxi cab.

Getting your ass kicked + Getting Run Over + Getting it videotaped and thrown all over the internet...


...is pretty much the 'Trifecta of Embarrassing'... what a lousy day this guy is having.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:


Jessica Simpson Taped a Scene in 'Entourage' (WWTDD)

oofah... remember when Jessica slimmed down for 'Dukes of Hazzard'?...good times.


Christina Naked in GQ...thank you. (Drunken Stepfather)

Even though Christina's Never Been Shy about Showing off her body before, she's a MILF now...

Top 10 Things Not To Say During A One Night Stand (The Campus Socialite)

16 Reasons Why Sports and Music Should Not Procreate (UPROXX)

PLAYBOY's Teri Harrison is Totally Naked on the Kitchen Counter...hopefully it was cleaned first (Freakshow Planet)

Gisele Bundchen poses for the Hope lingerie company (Celebrity Teaser)

Amber Nicole... Two Great Names and Two Great Ta-Ta's (Dailyniner)

10 singers in successful bands who really aren’t all that good (Guyism)

A Practical Guide to Hiding Your Friend’s Porn Stash (FunnyCrave)

Koopa's Hell (College Humor)

Nichole Heiress Inherited a Whole Pile of Sexy (z0d)

15 Of the Best Film Bullies (Gunaxin)


I'M SORRY:
(Sorry that there isn't a toothpaste strong enough to clean those awful teeth of yours)

Our buddy our pal OZZY OSBOURNE has released a five minute-long video preview of his upcoming album Scream (click to pre-order!):

'Scream' will be released on June 22, but you can pre-order online now

The Ellen Degeneres Show was actually watchable the other day. SLASH and Adam Levine from MAROON 5 made a li'l appearance:

SLASH's new album is available now, and it's got more guest appearances than a Jerry Lewis Telethon! (oh MAN that was a bad one)

From Rocks to Racks...

Ass-tastic adult starlet Alexis Texas is oiling up that masterpiece hiney of hers:

And oiling it up is only the foreplay to the ass-pounding she gets in BIG WET ASSES 14 on-demand now!

Busty British Bombshell Rachel Aldana is sporting the luckiest sweater EVER:

and we mean that it's very tight and her L-Cup Boobs blast out of it FAST, thereby making it 'Lucky'.

and since we like shameless self-promotion as much as the next fella

Here's Samantha in one of our official FoundryMusic T-Shirts shaking her ass to "Satisfied" by SOCIAL CODE:

CLICK THE PIC TO SEE SAMANTHA's SEXY STRIP!
(well it almost rhymes)

Then, when you have some motor function back... chat with Samantha LIVE, one-on-one, on her cam!

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Friday Links: Metalhead Wedding, Pants on fire, New Boobs on RateMyWOW, PREDATORS trailer, Michelle Bombshell Hardcore, Katherine Heigl almost topless

So, it's Friday. How will you spend YOUR weekend? Cooped up at home? or Hooked up with a new married friend looking for love?



Monogamy is for babies. Why do you they call it ADULTERY?? Hmmm?

THAT's TERRIBLE:

(So is your smile. Keep your mouth shut, or risk having all of your teeth chisled out)

Isn't that adorable! A young Turkish couple headbangs their way through their wedding:




And for the honeymoon, they get to pick out matching neck braces!

How does a person make it all the way into his teenage years without learning that gasoline-soaked-jeans + fire = BAD?




Apparently, no one told this genius.

So, uhh... would you blow up your Hollywood marriage for a piece of Michelle 'Bombshell' McGee?



Why, oh why Jesse James, did you bang this chick? ... well, after seeing all the hardcore footage she shot on her webcam, we might understand WHY.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:

New Boobs On RateMyWOW: Thanks again to our pals Yoshi and Brandon Iron, who is constantly shooting content for LOAD MY MOUTH (so very not-safe-for-work), we were able to add new bosoms to RateMyWOW today courtesy of adult starlets Shione Cooper and Jennifer Rox:





RateMyWOW: SHIONE COOPER

RateMyWOW: JENNIFER ROX

Have you SEEEN the new trailer for PREDATORS???




Hoolleee shit. Looks like Robert Rodriguez may manage to save this dwindling franchise

Kim Kardashian hides her chunky ass well (Drunken Stepfather)



Unless of course Ray J is pumping that ass from behind. Then she's not hiding it all that well..





Katherine Heigl almost lost her top (WWTDD)



What's the big deal? it's not like we haven't seen her tits before... Girls. Can't kill 'em. Can't live around 'em.



Why You Shouldn't Complain About New Facebook Designs (CollegeHumor)



a visit to Bushmills, Old Bushmills Distillery in Belfast (Bullz-Eye)



Kylie Ryan will leave you cryin'...for...more...umm. Oof, that was a struggle. (FreakshowPlanet)



2010 NFL Mock Draft Version 1.0 (Scores Report)



Asa Akira is a busty ass-tastica Asian Beauty (z0d)



Hot Tub Time Machine Kicks Some Past (COED Magazine)



Monika Benjar Busts out of her Blue Bikini (Dailyniner)



Chalk It Up To An Angry Protester Losing It (Apoliticus)



Does Your Dog Understand You When You Talk? (Asylum)



20 Moments In Strange Pet Walking (Banned In Hollywood)





I'M SORRY:

(Sorry that your breath stinks like booze, and your hair smells like old man breath. Repress much?)

Metal, duuuude! our friends in SHADOWS FALL hooked up with TESTAMENT guitarist Alex Skolnick in Toronto for a cover of "Bark at The Moon".



Umm, that would be "Bark at the Moon" by Mr. OZZY OSBOURNE for those of you who need lessons.

From heavy rock to heavy hooters...

Leggy blond sexy Czech babe Gina is giving the most ineffective washing to this Ferrari:



Something tells us she's not really focusing on the car.

As seen in this scene from PROZAC NATION, when Christina Ricci is naked in movies, the movie is always better:



Christina Ricci Naked = ALWAYS good.

To celebrate the opening of Gisele's new solo site, GOT GISELE take a look-see at the new FOUNDRY CAMS video she made for us:






Click on Gisele right now, and watch the full jaw-dropping awesome video!

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?


We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did



FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing



Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates



be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep



We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.



We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.



We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.



FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Thursday Links: Reporter tantrum, Italian announcer is a freak, New Robin Hood trailer, Mystery Nips, Christina Ricci Drunk, MEGADETH loves Canadians

Your asshole neighbor just pulled up in a new, very expensive BMW. Don't be jealous. Just nail his wife:



If he was getting the job done at home, she wouldn't be sending you all those "Winky Eye" text messages. Have fun. Be deviant. You only go 'round this crazy world once.

THAT's TERRIBLE:

(but your attitude stinks. You need an adjustment...with a hammer)

We'd like to introduce you to WVLT Reporter Gordon Boyd:




He had a li'l flip-out on camera and the anchor has the stones to blame it on "Technical Difficulties". Bwahahahaha.

...and this is 7 Gold sports announcer Tiziano Crudeli. He's Italian:




He screams like he's being stabbed to death every time he calls a play. We're shocked he's made it to 67 years of age.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:

Holy shit, the new trailer for Ridley Scott's ROBIN HOOD is online:



Wait, you mean ROBIN HOOD speaks with an English accent? Noooo. Someone ought to tell Kevin Costner.

whose mystery nips poking through a black dress are these? (Drunken Stepfather)



here's a hint: she and her sister both like the black dudes...only one of them has a sex tape.





Christina Ricci Looks like a Fun Drunk (WWTDD)



and anyone who has seen her exposed boobs in films like 'Black Snake Moan' would agree.



Review: GREEN ZONE (Bullz-Eye)



If you had a body like Erica Campbell, you'd play with it all the time too (FreakshowPlanet)



Five Girls You Find in Every College Lecture (FunnyCrave)



Sensual Jane is showing off her special spot (z0d)



Top 10 Songs About Being Horny (Heavy)



Samantha Ryan has itty bitty nubs, but a nify back-end (Dailyniner)



Murray the Nut’s Greatest Hits, Vol. 6 (FunnyCrave)



Darth Vader Winter Vacation (Ego TV)



Sexy Girl At the Beach (Fork Party)



Ten Of The Most Underrated Simpsons Characters (Gunaxin)



A Photo Gallery Tribute To Impressive Nintendo Modifications (AfroJacks)





I'M SORRY:

(Sorry that you have to seduce mentally challenged young girls in order to get laid. Sad. So so sad)

So, 50% of the original MEGADETH lineup (Mustaine, Ellefson, and two other guys) is on tour now:



Which means that the other 50% of the original lineup is probably working at Carvel, shining up the scopes on their sniper rifles.

From heavy metal, we move on to heavy boobs...

Busty British brunette Michelle Monaghan is looking for any excuse to get topless:



Whoa! She found beer! Helloo excuse!.

Keeping with the British theme, Gemma Massey doesn't like itchy corsets...so the one she was wearing didn't stay on for long



We have the same problem. We hate itchy corsets. We just don't look as good as she does with them.

Sexy little Valentina Vaughn has pants on that are way too tight



There's only one solution. Exactly. Burn the pants. Pants are evil. Right Valentina?

In honor of Carmen's new solo site check out this old school FOUNDRY CAMS video we dug up:







CLICK ON CARMEN's BREASTACULAR BODY... like, umm...now.

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?


We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did



FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing



Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates



be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep



We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.



We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.



We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.



FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.