Three-way-kissing extravaganza, Sebastian Bach sings for UoA, ALTER BRIDGE and SLASH live in Hollywood, Jelena Jensen, and Rachel Aldana show off their boob meat

The next time you head out to a nightclub with your cronies, try to go for the elusive three-way makeout session...

WHo cares if they showed up with other guys... they're all yours for the night... no, we don't mean the boyfriends

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(How's about a New Year's Resolution to get into smaller jeans? No? Didn't think so)

Don't make the clerk at the halal-friendly KFC angry...

You wouldn't like him when he's angry. (and no, we'd never even heard of a 'halal-friendly' ANYTHING until we saw this clip)

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:


Sophie Monk and her boobs are making a really cheesy movie. (Drunken Stepfather)

Chikita is one sexy Chickie, especially when she's without those pesky clothes (FreakShow Planet)

Girl Next Door: Jaimie Bernhardt (Bullz-Eye)

Veronica DeSouza is a well-oiled instrument. Quick, someone blow into her! (z0d)

Medellon Con is cozying up to not one, but TWO naked young ladies! (Dailyniner)

Vocab Lessons: Baseball Metaphors For Grown-Ups (How about We...)

Stupid Advice: The Art of Manscaping (The Smoking Jacket)

Uncle Administers Ass Whoopin Justice on Teenage Nephew (Video GOne Viral)



I'M SORRY:
(Sorry, not every meal consists of cake, blubber guts)

Most college teams have fight songs, but thanks to Sebastian Bach, the University of Oregon has its own POWER BALLAD:

And thanks to irreconcilable differences, Sebastian is separated from his wife of 18 years. Pow. Zing.

Those nifty boys in ALTER BRIDGE we joined by none other than SLASH on stage in HOllywood:

Let the VELVET REVOLVER speculation begin...and end... because Slash has said it's not Myles Kennedy who is commited to Alter Bridge.

...and what would a whole day's worth of rock updates be without... you guessed it! Racks!

Jelena Jensen has very little practical use for those huge boobs of hers:

Unless of course, she's exposing them, then I'm sure you could find a few dozen uses for them...like hammering niails with them

Buty Brit Rachel Aldana knows exactly how far those enormoud G-cups will ger her Next up on the agenda... a brothel in Nevada!

Once again, we marvel at how a girl like that can stay upright with those things hanging off her chest.


...and that, as they say, is that. Now go enjoy the day and try not to offend anyone with your horrendous stench...

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Pick-Up Artist, Drunk Crying Russian, Mechanic Redband trailer, new music from MR BIG, Shyla Jennings, Jana Defi, and Faye Reagan

going out tonight? Let's help take the guess work out of picking up a young lady at the club...

If she's on the floor passed out and her boyfriend walked out with someone new... she's EXACTLY where you need her to be. Now put your back into it, pack mule!

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(How's about a New Year's Resolution to get into smaller jeans? No? Didn't think so)

What's the Russian guy so emotional about?

Honestly, he's so drunk, he might as well be crying about his shoelaces being untied. Boy, that's embarrassing.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:

The new redband trailer for THE MECHANIC has more blood, more guts, and more boobies:

All of the above make this Jason Statham movie MUCH more gooder.

Speaking of movies... Do you like movies? Want to have your reviews in our MOVIE REVIEW SECTION? No problem. Just Email us with a sample review ... now, dammit!


When will Heidi Montag go Away? Apparently not yet. (Drunken Stepfather)

Chikita is one sexy Chickie, especially when she's without those pesky clothes (FreakShow Planet)

2011 Movie Preview (Bullz-Eye)

Jennifer Best looks best when she's sans-clothing (z0d)

Uma Stone...one of the few women named 'Uma' we'd consider doing (Dailyniner)

The Only Other Jobs ‘Dog The Bounty Hunter’ Could Do (Fork Party)

Stuff You Should Know: Pirates (The Smoking Jacket)

What Would You Add to This List of Bachelor Pad Must-Haves? (BroBible)



I'M SORRY:
(Sorry, not every meal consists of cake, blubber guts)

After a bumpy few years, MR BIG is back with a new studio album, What If:

All it took was a break-up (2002), a reformation (2009) and a world tour (2010) to get them to take another run at the money. Ah, capitalism.

Let's abruptly segue into boobies. Why? Because boobies RULE...

Shyla Jennings is Twistys Treat this month and with good reason:

ANY girl who just has to get naked deserves some kind of award, doesn't she?

Sexy Czech Jana Defi has 32G-sized funbags, and how she stays upright is a mystery. She SHOULD be falling on her face:

And considering those knockers are ATTACHED to her, she has an awful lot of fun playing with them. Boobs. They NEVER get old, do they?

Pale-skinned adult starlet Faye Reagan doesn't like taking orders from Hayden Winters:

See? She looks so bummed out, doesn't she? What's a gal to do? Ahh, wait...we know...go get a bunch of your average-looking friends and attack!

...and that, as they say, is that. Now go enjoy the day and try not to offend anyone with your horrendous stench...

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Fireworks vs Scooter, New Boobs on RateMyWow, Mel Gibson Hates Oksana and Misses his Lakers, Pam Anderson's new PETA ad, Aweome EXPENDABLES Trailer, Bret Michaels vs the Out-of-Tune Guitar, Carol Goldenerova is No Mechanic, Carmella Bing is covered in Oil

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(but not half as terrible as your halitosis. Have a mint, dragon-breath)

Why sell that old scooter to a fellow Russian when you can blow it up with a big ass brick of fireworks?

Oh, who are we bullshitting? Blowing up shit with fireworks is fun everywhere.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:

New Boobs On RateMyWOW: Thanks again to our pals Yoshi and Brandon Iron, who is constantly shooting content for LOAD MY MOUTH and SHE IS HALF MY AGE (so very not-safe-for-work), we were able to add new bosoms to RateMyWOW today courtesy of nicely nubbed Asian PERRY and SWEET JANE:


RateMyWOW: SWEET JANE
RateMyWOW: PERRY

The most awesomest trailer for The EXPENDABLES wasn't done by the folks at LIONSGATE. Go figger.

Sylvester Stallone Testosterone-Fests are meant to dominate the box office. Right?

Mel Gibson Hates Oksana & Misses the Lakers (WWTDD)


Pamela Anderson's Controversial New PETA ad (Drunken Stepfather)

Oh thank God for that... Pamela Anderson's homemade sex tapes were getting so boring... Wait a minute, no they weren't.

A LeBron James Haters Guide (FunnyCrave)

Buxom Brooke Lee Adams just busted out of her sweater. Who's complaining? No one. That's right. (Freakshow Planet)

The Sorcerer's Apprentice - A movie Review (Bullz-Eye)

Cody Love just LOVES to get naked and play with herself. We Love Cody Love for doing that (Dailyniner)

UPROXX Summer Guide: The Hottest New Video Games (UPROXX)

Eight of the Creepiest Places to Check Into on Foursquare (Asylum)

How come WE never had teachers that look like Brooke Banner? (z0d)

The Old Spice Guy Proposes A Swan Dive Into Marriage (Campus Socialite)

How To Poop At Work, in case you didn't know (Dave and Thomas)

'Axe Cop' Coming to Print at Dark Horse Comics (Comics Alliance)


I'M SORRY:
(Sorry that your hopes and dreams have been crushed like so many empty beer cans)

Yes, he's our buddy. Yes, BRET MICHAELS (who has a new CD to promote) was on The View playing with a very out-of-tune Guitar:

Ten bucks says some roadie got beaten with that guitar as soon as they went to commercial.

From poorly-tuned guitars to nicely-tuned ta-ta's...

Sexy Czech Carol Goldenerova doesn't know a thing about fixing cars, but she's got a socket wrench and really big boobs:

So we're going to drop our car off and pray for the best... if Carol spends the whole time feeling herself up... we'll be OK with never driving our shitbox again.

Busty brunette Carmella Bing must be in a really tight bikini... cuz she's got to cover herself in baby oil to get out of the thing:

...or are we missing the point entirely? Watch Carmella's whole raunchy scene in Big Wet Tits 6 (which you can see on-demand) ...and decide for yourself, pal.

What do two naked hotties like Renna Ryann and Diamon James do when they're alone?

Why, they lick chocolate icing off each other ...which is, of course, how we think ALL women behave together. Because we're totally deluded.

aaaaand what would an update from us be without a beautiful young lady from FOUNDRY CAMS shaking her ass to rock music, which happens to be from DROWNING POOL this time:


Stare into Shanelle's eyes... only for a moment, then Head on over to FOUNDRY CAMS and Chat with Shanelle LIVE...and nekkid (her, not you...genius)

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.