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THAT's TERRIBLE:
(but not half as terrible as your halitosis. Have a mint, dragon-breath)
Why sell that old scooter to a fellow Russian when you can blow it up with a big ass brick of fireworks?
Oh, who are we bullshitting? Blowing up shit with fireworks is fun everywhere.
THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:
New Boobs On RateMyWOW: Thanks again to our pals Yoshi and Brandon Iron, who is constantly shooting content for LOAD MY MOUTH and SHE IS HALF MY AGE (so very not-safe-for-work), we were able to add new bosoms to RateMyWOW today courtesy of nicely nubbed Asian PERRY and SWEET JANE:
RateMyWOW: SWEET JANE
RateMyWOW: PERRY
The most awesomest trailer for The EXPENDABLES wasn't done by the folks at LIONSGATE. Go figger.
Sylvester Stallone Testosterone-Fests are meant to dominate the box office. Right?
Mel Gibson Hates Oksana & Misses the Lakers (WWTDD)
Pamela Anderson's Controversial New PETA ad (Drunken Stepfather)
Oh thank God for that... Pamela Anderson's homemade sex tapes were getting so boring... Wait a minute, no they weren't.
A LeBron James Haters Guide (FunnyCrave)
Buxom Brooke Lee Adams just busted out of her sweater. Who's complaining? No one. That's right. (Freakshow Planet)
The Sorcerer's Apprentice - A movie Review (Bullz-Eye)
Cody Love just LOVES to get naked and play with herself. We Love Cody Love for doing that (Dailyniner)
UPROXX Summer Guide: The Hottest New Video Games (UPROXX)
Eight of the Creepiest Places to Check Into on Foursquare (Asylum)
How come WE never had teachers that look like Brooke Banner? (z0d)
The Old Spice Guy Proposes A Swan Dive Into Marriage (Campus Socialite)
How To Poop At Work, in case you didn't know (Dave and Thomas)
'Axe Cop' Coming to Print at Dark Horse Comics (Comics Alliance)
I'M SORRY:
(Sorry that your hopes and dreams have been crushed like so many empty beer cans)
Yes, he's our buddy. Yes, BRET MICHAELS (who has a new CD to promote) was on The View playing with a very out-of-tune Guitar:
Ten bucks says some roadie got beaten with that guitar as soon as they went to commercial.
From poorly-tuned guitars to nicely-tuned ta-ta's...
Sexy Czech Carol Goldenerova doesn't know a thing about fixing cars, but she's got a socket wrench and really big boobs:
So we're going to drop our car off and pray for the best... if Carol spends the whole time feeling herself up... we'll be OK with never driving our shitbox again.
Busty brunette Carmella Bing must be in a really tight bikini... cuz she's got to cover herself in baby oil to get out of the thing:
...or are we missing the point entirely? Watch Carmella's whole raunchy scene in Big Wet Tits 6 (which you can see on-demand) ...and decide for yourself, pal.
What do two naked hotties like Renna Ryann and Diamon James do when they're alone?
Why, they lick chocolate icing off each other ...which is, of course, how we think ALL women behave together. Because we're totally deluded.
aaaaand what would an update from us be without a beautiful young lady from FOUNDRY CAMS shaking her ass to rock music, which happens to be from DROWNING POOL this time:
Stare into Shanelle's eyes... only for a moment, then Head on over to FOUNDRY CAMS and Chat with Shanelle LIVE...and nekkid (her, not you...genius)
Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?
We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did
FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing
Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates
be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep
We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.
We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.
We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.
FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.
WooHoo! Weekend! Pants are Officially Optional! Especially if you plan on going out to a club and picking up a few ladies who may/may not be wearing any
Even if they showed up with guys, it's not your problem. It's a free world, and the ladies can go home with you if they want. The statistics on female adultery will blow your mind.
THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Just like your stench after a weekend of heavy drinking)
Car blows tire, cartwheels across highway in Taiwan, and gets broadsided by the very bus it just passed:
...and the soothing music continues to play in the bus as the carnage unfolds.
THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:
Mel Gibson is sensitive... wait, no he isn't (audio link) (WWTDD)
Saaay, whose surgically-enhanced, overly-tanned clam are these panties covering up? (Drunken Stepfather)
C'mon, guess! we promise we won't give away the answer... oh wait, we just did. Oopsie
Italian TV is Good - BOOBS! (Warming Glow)
Playboy's Keylee Parker has Perky Nubs...only really big ones (Freakshow Planet)
Girl Next Door: Lindsay Ann (Bullz-Eye)
Israeli Soldiers Get Busted for Dancing to Ke$ha's 'TiK ToK' on Patrol (The One) (URLesque)
Old Spice Guy on Boat Commercial (Todays Big Thing)
Zara is super-psyched about her new sex toy. It's a butt plug (Dailyniner)
Internet Sex Moves: Volume 2 (College Humor)
Sindy has a new Sex Toy, and her hands down her pants...she must have an itch (z0d)
7 Products You Should Never Buy Generic (FunnyCrave)
Twitter Shakes Things Up with California Earthquake (Campus Socialite)
I'M SORRY:
(Sorry that it's going to take you weeks to get your dried up puke cleaned off the living room sofa)
The guys in WINGER are still at it (laugh all you want, they still play better than you do) and here they are in New York City:
Performing "Seventeen" for a bunch of 35 year-olds.
Speaking of guys who play better than you, this is JOE STUMP. He shreds like Yngwie, teaches at Berklee, and does "Shred Clinics" like this one in Cincinnati:
...and the sad thing is he may still be living with his parents
From musicians to multi-talented mistresses
You probably have heard of Dutch adult starlet Bobbi Eden (that's what happens when you promise to give out free blow jobs):
This is a scene from BOBBI EDEN EXPOSED - which you can see on demand NOW.
2 women having a conversation in a kitchen, right? WRONG! it's Angelina Valentine and Mya Nichole - seconds before breaking out the sex toys:
This conversation is about all we can show you because the video gets very messy very quickly ...and the clean-up crew is going to need special stuff to get the bodily fluids off those granite counters.
So, you're into large-breasted tattooed girls with no inhibitions? then you should meet Mason Moore... she's about as filthy as they come/cum/whatever:
this clip is from BIG WET ASSES 17..and again, it's abuot all we can show you without the authorities showing up.
aaaaand what would an update from us be without a beautiful young lady from FOUNDRY CAMS shaking her ass to rock music, which happens to be from DROWNING POOL this time:
Stare into Shanelle's eyes... only for a moment, then Head on over to FOUNDRY CAMS and Chat with Shanelle LIVE...and nekkid (her, not you...genius)
Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?
We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did
FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing
Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates
be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep
We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.
We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.
We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.
FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.
What better way to celebrate your country's independence than spending time with 2 lonely MILFs in your kitchen?
C'mon, that really happens doesn't it? see? Someone took pictures of this real-wife-threesome and put it online. Everything on the internet is real. Remember that.
THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Just like your stench after a weekend of heavy drinking)
We don't know what's more distracting: The Tornado forming over the trailer park in Billings, Montana...
... or the huffing-and-puffing woman behind the camera yelling 'Oh Shit!' over and over.
THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:
Anna Faris is Completely Naked In Boston (WWTDD)
Daaaayum Since when does Anna Faris have such an incredibly hot naked ass? Since ALWAYS? Sheesh, where have WE been?
Katy Perry Nude on Twitter? Eh, maybe. (Drunken Stepfather)
Fun With Fireworks (Gunaxin)
Ginger B will add some Spice to your Otherwise-Boring Life (Freakshow Planet)
A Chat With Craig Robinson (Hot Tub Time Machine, The Office) (Bullz-Eye)
Jaleel White's 'Fake it if You Make it' Web Series Finale With Wayne Brady (URLesque)
The Consequences of Losing A Bet At Work (DJMICK)
The Lesbian Ballet = the ONLY Ballet you'll ever see us at (Dailyniner)
Food Sex: Is It Porn? (Asylum)
Georgia Jones is the Sweetest Peach in the Entire Pool (z0d)
The 15 Greatest Freedom Fighters in Videogame History (Dorkly)
How to Celebrate the 4th of July During the Recession (FunnyCrave)
Win Yourself 'Hot Tub Time Machine' on DVD and Blu-Ray (FilmDrunk)
I'M SORRY:
(Sorry that it's going to take you weeks to get your dried up puke cleaned off the living room sofa)
A successful Documentary, Millions of New Fans Worldwide, and ANVIL is still playing clubs?:
You really have to love the music business. It's so fair.
Nobody rocks an Eight-minute-long progressive rock anthem like DREAM THEATER (on tour now - click for tickets):
DREAM THEATER is going to be opening for IRON MAIDEN for the next few months (so get those tickets, chump).
The guys in MURDERDOLLS re-formed the band and hit the stage for the first time since 2004:
Looking just like MOTLEY CRUE in 1984.
From Bands, we segue right into... you guessed it! Boobs!
The breastacular Sara Stone and Yurizan Beltran are getitng all kinds of friendly once again:
Topless. Poolside. Girl-Girl. Kissing. 'Nuff said.
Adult starlet Sativa Rose is getting her Butt all oiled up:
and if you need to see the whole scene RIGHT NOW, You can check out BIG WET ASSES 11 - on Demand NOW!
Angelic-looking Adult Starlet Kelly Divine is starring in one of the STRANGEST scenes we've seen in a while:
Hey Fellini, relax a little. It's a skin flick. You're not getting nominated for an Oscar.
This semi-pantsless young lady is Ricki White and she's giving a lucky lounge chair the ride of its life:
You'll never want to be a piece of furniture MORE. Lucky Chair.
Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?
We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did
FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing
Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates
be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep
We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.
We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.
We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.
FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.
Ooh, it's Wednesday! It's Hump Day! So grab your favorite frisky co-worker and get frisky in a hotel suite of yuor choosing:
We don't make the rules. We simply enforce them. Having an affair is your civic duty, so get to it... or we'll issue you a summons written in crayon.
THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Just like your hairline. It's called ROGAINE. Go get some.)
A poor chubby Australian Football fan got pegged in the face with a football.
...and those nice guys at the AFL FOOTY SHOW on Australia's Nine Network grabbed it for all of us to enjoy.
The Sloppiest, Drunkest, Chubbiest Gal ever... Falls face-first right in front of the worst METALLICA cover band. EVER.
The drinking is forgiveable. The botching of "Enter Sandman"... is not. Shoot them all.
THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:
Britney Spears is Under Investigation For Child Abuse (WWTDD)
Say it aint so!!! Not THIS Briney Spears!!! Yup. That one.
Dolly Parton's Old Lady Boobs Are Wonderful (Drunken Stepfather)
The Full Bizarre Story Behind Don't Taze My Granny (Asylum)
Sexy Sophie Moon is Mooning The Camera...and a lot more (Freakshow Planet)
Featured Model: Niki (Bullz-Eye)
Lenny Kravitz Surprise Performance of 'Fly Away' With Church Choir (URLesque)
Mavis Bacon Teaches Texting (CollegeHumor)
Jessica Lynn is going to show you where you can shove it. Politely, of course. (Dailyniner)
The Most Bizarre of Batman’s Baddies (Gunaxin)
Angelina Valentine wants to be your tattooed, naked valentine. Seriously. We asked her. (z0d)
Yeahs! Paraguay wins! More Larissa Riquelme World Cup Pictures (Dave and Thomas)
Attention: Flying Cars. That is All (GammaSquad)
You Had Me at 'RZA Made a Kung-Fu Movie' (FilmDrunk)
I'M SORRY:
(Sorry that the only ass you'll ever get is attached to a Peruvian pool boy)
James Hetfield and Dave Mustaine? On Stage? Playing Together? Whoa boy. Hell Froze Over:
What kind of universe is it that METALLICA and MEGADETH are getting along?
Our buddy MOTLEY CRUE frontman VINCE NEIL played his new single "Tattoos & Tequila" in New Hampshire alongside his bandmates Dana Strum and Jeff Blando (from SLAUGHTER):
...just a few days prior to getting a DUI in Las Vegas for (allegedly) drinking too much Tequila (maybe).
From Hard Rock to Hard Nips...
For those of you not in the know, this brunette beauty is Cody Lane:
She's oiling up her fanny in BIG WET ASSES 11 - which you can see on demand now...and she gets choked out with a ladder.
Hungarian Hotness Aletta Ocean gets a full-body rubdown.. in the only massage parlor on the planet that you can get away with groping your clients:
In what universe can you get away with boning your hot female clients? We want to move there, dammit.
And for you fans of the meatier ladies, meet Texas-born Busty Beauty Angel Gee who does NOT like wearing tight dresses:
Those are 36F-sized Funbags. Someone's going to need a back brace.
We have another beautiful busty blond babe shakin' her hiney in a FoundryMusic shirt...
Busty blond beautiful Bobbia makes her FOUNDRY CAMS debut in this clip featuring music by Sweden's CRASHDIET:
CLick Bobbia's Booty, damn you!!
Nice, right? Cam up with Bobbia at FOUNDRY CAMS and try to charm her out of her shorts
Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?
We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did
FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing
Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates
be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep
We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.
We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.
We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.
FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.
The air is crisp, the drinks are flowing, and the air is just right for Humping! (you know, because of the whole Wednesday/Hump Day thing)
Find the closest promiscuous co-worker and have an inter-office fling. You don't want to be the only person not having an affair, do you?
THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Just like your work ethic. Calling out again, eh?)
Everyone say hi to Nikki. She got a paintball gun as a graduation gift:
Freakout in 3,2,1...aaaand GO!
THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:
The trailer for the new GREEN HORNET film starring Seth Rogen is online:
Meh. Good? Maybe. 3D? For sure. Kato? Chinese. Will we like it? Who knows. Let's wait for trailer #2.
Lady Gaga Wore Stupid Boots and Fell Down (WWTDD)
Which pop-princess MILF has perky nips? (Drunken Stepfather)
OK, here's a li'l hint... her last name USED to rhyme with 'Shmederline'
Seven Sex Stats That Should Make You Feel Better About Yourself (The Campus Socialite)
Jayden Cole is Showing off her... *ahem*...hole (Freakshow Planet)
A chat with Billy West - voice actor from Futurama (Bullz-Eye)
Is Mickey Rooney Behind @MickeyRooney on Twitter? (URLesque)
Czech Rugby Ad Running During Soccer World Cup (Video Gone Viral)
Charlie Laine Gives Herself a Milk Bath in the Bathroom...stall, that is. (Dailyniner)
Five Cool Recent Medical Advances You May Not Of Heard About (UPROXX)
What's the opposite of 'shy'? - it's Lindsey Meadows (z0d)
When Passengers Go Nuts -- 5 Airplane Rides Gone Bad (The Bachelor Guy)
The 30 Greatest Kids’ Cereals of All Time (Gunaxin)
I'M SORRY:
(Sorry that your time in the cool kids club is dwindling... tick tock, tick tock, tick tock...)
In honor of his new album, Scream, we've got OZZY OSBOURNE's new video:
OZZY is going on tour for 18 months to promote this new album - get your tickets NOW!
Hell must have frozen over, because that's METALLICA, MEGADETH, SLAYER, and ANTHRAX on stage together:
That's the hap-hap-happies bunch of headbangers playing DIAMOND HEAD's "Am I Evil" in Bulgaria.
Gimme a 'B'! ... Gimme a 'oobies'...What's that spell?
Julia Bond's Butt is all oiled up. Hopefully she's not counting on BP to clean up the mess:
To see what happens to that oily rump, check out BIG WET ASSES 11 - On Demand Now!
Busty Blond Twistys Treat Harmony Paxson is falling out of her tight blue dress:
...and that's the only way we want to see her.
aaaand we have another beautiful busty blond babe shakin' her hiney in a FoundryMusic shirt...
Busty blond beautiful Bobbia makes her FOUNDRY CAMS debut in this clip featuring music by Sweden's CRASHDIET:
CLick Bobbia's Booty, damn you!!
Nice, right? Cam up with Bobbia at FOUNDRY CAMS and try to charm her out of her shorts
Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?
We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did
FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing
Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates
be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep
We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.
We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.
We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.
FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.
