Jumpy Crab, Obsessing over Iron Man, Joslyn James Says Tito Beat Up Jenna, Kim Kardashian's Tight Clothes, Lopez Luvz SLASH, Brazilians Love MEGADETH, Knocker Hockey with Dominno, Candice Cardinele in The Kitchen

Happpy HUMP DAY, kids. Hump a mom, whydontcha?

This MILF in a bikini could be all yours... thanks to the people who encourage you to fornicate with MILFs.

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(just like your ace and hairline. Boy, are YOU in trouble)

Some animals don't want to be eaten:


Like this crab, who got a little jumpy when tossed into a pot of boiling water.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:

We're obsessing over this suitcase-armor scene from the new IRON MAN film:


HOw do ya fit all that armor into a suitcase, man? You're wrecking the illusion, maaaaan! (incidentally, we were told several times that the suitcase armor IS in fact part of IRON MAN mythos. We are, quite obviously, idiots.

Joslyn James says Tito Ortiz Beat up Jenna Jameson (WWTDD)

and why wouldn't you believe every word she says...Anyone whose best work is showcased in 'Monster Cock POV 2' should never be argued with. We don't even need to hear Tito's end of this.


Kim Kardashian Loves Squeezing Herself into very tight, very shiny outfits (Drunken Stepfather)

and she also likes going down on black guys... why do we keep going with that gag? Because we love beating bits like that to death.

5 Questions from Tribeca With Bill Murray (MovieFone)

Roxanna, you don't have to put on the red Light... but taking off your dress would be nifty (Freakshow Planet)

A Chat with Patrick Stewart (Bullz-Eye)

Kagney Linn Karter is Kinda Kute when she's naked (Dailyniner)

Courtney Love Resurrects Hole Once Again for 'Nobody's Daughter' (Asylum)

Top 10 Ways To Mess With Your Drunk Friends (TheCampusSocialite)

Get the New Gillette ProGlide Free, Before it Hits Shelves (TheBachelorGuy)

Andrea B is Pretending to be Bashful...but she's really Bare-assed (z0d)

Awesome HALO Parody Mashup (GammaSquad)

The 10 Most Awesome Mascot Dunks Of All Time (With Video) (Bleacher Report)

SEC Checks Itself In To Rehab Due To Porn Addiction (Apoliticus)


I'M SORRY:
(Sorry that the chip on your shoulder is roughly the size of Mount Everest)

Look who's popping up all over the damn place. It's SLASH on Lopez Tonight (again):

only Myles Kennedy is singing with him this time, and not that lousy Aussie from Wolfmother. His hair is creepy, ain't it?

What do Brazilians love more than transexuals and prostitutes? MEGADETH, dammit!

See? The proof is in the video. You can never have enough prostitutes though, can you?

from heavy bands to, well... heavy hooters (only so many good segues, you know)

Large-breasted exotic adult starlet Dominnno is playing a friendly game of air hockey:

and as you might imagine, it's not long before she's playing with herself...on the air hockey table. Someone get a mop

from the rec room, we move upstairs to the kitchen...

where you'll find Candice Cardinele sauntering around in next to nothing:

when you have a body like that, you're kind of obligated, you know?

Why do we love sending out enormous old school FoundryMusic T-Shirts to our FOUNDRY CAMS girls? Because we love seeing what girls like Brooke and Sweet Victoria wind up doing with them. In this case, they made a vest and a miniskirt, respectively.
Thanks to our friends in FRAMING HANLEY for "Stupid Girl".

Click on Brooke blond locks, and stare wide-eyed at the screen for a while

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.