HUGE update for people looking to waste a PILE of time: Trick Or Treat Trailer, OZZY on Sobriety, Carmen's Cans, Zakk Wylde on American Idol, Lemmy on stage with SLASH

and now for a close-up of the late Lon Chaney's testicles...you know you want to see it.


Yo mang! Whassup! This be some coo' shizz, yo
You follow US on twitter and we follow YOU on twitter. Simple enough, right? and YES, we DO follow you. To the post office, to the grocery store, etc...
- Follow this one and we'll keep you up to date on all the children we keep in cages...KIDDING!
- Now Follow this one (we'll keep you up to date on what all the girlies are doing)

Your mom is SO fed up with your old man's antics that she's pushing his Mustang into a pond:

How do we know this? we found it in her personal ad... Hell hath no fury, dude.

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Same as the way you say mean things under your breath, thinking no one will notice. Of course everyone DOES)

Here are some prophetic words of wisdom from a once non-sober OZZY OSBOURNE:

Yes, it does indeed S U C K. Unless you think getting out of bed to make poo is gross.

Amazing documentary. Highly reccommended. Yes, by US. Sheesh.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:

(Unlike your feet, which smell like you walked through elephant shit)

and now, the movie that proved that playing your records backwards was ALWAYS a bad idea - TRICK OR TREAT

You know Skippy from FAMILY TIES was in this, right? Oh yeah, Gene Simmons and OZZY OSBOURNE too.

Yes, playing your records backwards raises dead rock stars from the dead. God, do we have to explain it all?.

Jennifer Lawrence ... is umm... not related to Martin Lawrence or Joey Lawrence:

In fact, we have no F-ing idea who she is. So there.

Nevaeh. Raina Lee. Touching Tongues. That is all. Resume clicking (FreakShow Planet)

2011 Volvo S60 T6 AWD Car Review (Bullz-Eye)

5 More Rom-Com Sequels We'd Like to See (After When Harry Met Sally 2) (How About We)

I'm Ashamed to be a Boston Sports Fan (MadeMan)

lisa Niels is wearing pants that don't fit. Thankfully she doesn't keep them on for long (z0d)

Sandee Westgate has brown hair and a big-ass tattoo on her ribs. When did this shit happen? (Daily Niner)

I'M SORRY:
(Sorry your taste in women is like your taste in clothing; cheesy, beat up, and worn out)

Anyone see a little show called American Idol last night?

You should check it out. See, it's like a talent show / karaoke contest. There's celebrity judges... oh yeah, and ZAKK F*CKING WYLDE.

Zakk has a little band thing he does on the side...sha-boom.

The fact that Johnny Solinger from SKID ROW can cook is fairly... uhhh, meh.

The fact that he can chug a bottle of tequila near a hot stove and open flame? NOw THAT folks, is entertainment!

See, Johnny is the guy who came into the band after they re-formed...he's not Sebastian Bach, but that has more to do with D.N.A., you know?

Yes, that's Lemmy from MOTORHEAD and his prune-sized liver on stage with SLASH in Argentina.

Does the ol' Lem even HAVE a liver anymore? Sucker drinks an awful lot of Jack Daniels, yaknowwhatImean, mang?

If you haven't seen the Lemmy movie yet, then ... well, you're just a doo-doo brain. Yup. I said it. Doo-Doo brain.

We just thought this was some cool video, so we put it up.

Well, that and we thought a testicle-angle video of Corey Taylor from STONE SOUR was good enough to post.

Someone asked me if I had the new STONE SOUR disc the other day. I yelled "Yes!"...and then slapped him with a fresh haddock.

OK, time to bring out the beeeeeyotches, yo

What is it with girls like Danni Kaliforniaand these enormous bottles of baby oil?

Is their skin that scaly? It certainly must be, because they use an awful lot of it.

our girl Carmen who you have seen in dozens of FOUNDRY CAMS videos... made um...this:

You can catch Carmen each and every night LIVE at FOUNDRY CAMS! ...aaaaaand roll credits.

Speaking of FOUNDRY CAMS, we felt it needed a facelift, so we made a whole nifty new page at over here now...

We totally revamped FOUNDRY CAMS, with a new domain, hotter girls, lower prices, and a better user experience. So far, the response has beeen HUGE. Check it out:


and if you feel like following us on Twitter (we'll keep you up to date on what all the girlies are doing)

Click it, fool!

Speaking of FOUNDRY CAMS check out what WE got from GISELE:
The lovely blonde Gisele, who you have seen in dozens of FOUNDRY CAMS videos, is back at it once again with a hosed-down FoundryMusic T-shirt, high heels, and very little else on. She's shaking her perfectly-formed hiney to FOUNDRY's "Ain't Like You" from the RETOOLED album, mixed by Rich DeCicco and featuring our buddy Rob Balducci on guitar. Thanks as always to Jon for the editing.

Buy FOUNDRY: Retooled now at Amazon:



Watch Video. Click Photo. Enjoy Gisele. Simple, right? (you'd be shocked how many people fuck that up)

...and that, friends... is the way to make salsa in woodchipper.

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Poo-eating-Gorilla, New PIRANHA 3D trailer, Johnny Depp is a Boy Scout, Boring Bra on a Sexy Actress, New LIMP BIZKIT, ALICE COOPER and MEGADETH live, Alexis Texas, Katrin & Westy

Happy Mondee, everybuddy. Here's hoping you spent the weekend fornicating with a co-worker in a motel with lots of sex toys. If you didn't, then you're missing out, dagnabbit.

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(just like the smell you leave behind when you walk out of a room)

Going to the zoo... Going to the zoo... Gonna watch a gorilla eat his poo...


and that's it for the educational portion of today's update.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:

As if the first trailer wasn't mind-numbing enough, the second trailer for PIRANHA 3D will make your skin-crawl (but in a fun way):


Jam-packed with toothy fish, idiot college kids, and Doc Brown himself, Christopher Lloyd!.

Johnny Depp is a Goody Two-Shoes (WWTDD)


think 'Showgirls' .... 'Bound'... got it yet? No? You're a dipshit. (Drunken Stepfather)

Need Help? she apparently had a boob job to make her tiny boobs...less tiny... because why be obvious when you can be...subtle

'Iron Man 2' After Credits Scene Revealed [SPOILERS] (Comics Alliance)

Diana Doll is Damn sexy in her Green thong (Freakshow Planet)

Top 5 Light Beers (Bullz-Eye)

Vanessa Wade is a well-proportioned wife (Dailyniner)

Slave Leias Make For Sexiest Geek Car Wash Ever (Asylum)

Top 10 Movies Not To See With Your Parents (The Campus Socialite)

The 6 Greatest Movie Villains We Just Forgot About (UPROXX)

Nikki Benz is Blond, Buxom, Beautiful...and she's nekkid! (z0d)

The 20 Most Boobtastic Athletes Of All Time (Bleacher Report)

Creating Your Own Cockney Slang Words (FunnyCrave)


I'M SORRY:
(Sorry that there's no Nobel Prize for holding grudges...because you'd get it for sure!)

Finally (sarcasm intended)! Some new music from LIMP BIZKIT!:

Sounds like old LIMP BIZKIT...which is good if that's your thing.

Nice to see ALICE COOPER doing his thing on stage in Vancouver, and NOT breaking a hip:

ALICE COOPER and ROB ZOMBIE are on tour NOW! (click for tickets!)

We've said it before, but it's apparently true: MEGADETH is just as popular in Argentina as South American Hookers:

It's difficult to find something more popular than South American Hookers, wouldn't you say?

From Bands we move to booty...

Booty-tastic ALEXIS TEXAS - who has made more video than we can count is showing off her outstanding hiney on the stairs:

She's part German, and part Puerto Rican. Guess which part is Puerto Rican?

From Big Booty to Bigger Boobies...

Naturally-buxom Czech blondes Katerina Hartlova and Westy are playing a li'l game of indoor soccer:

We're much less interested in the dumb soccer game than the bisexual boob-fest that happens afterwards to be honest.

You like blondes, do ya Doc?

Why do we love sending out enormous old school FoundryMusic T-Shirts to our FOUNDRY CAMS girls? Because we love seeing what girls like Brooke and Sweet Victoria wind up doing with them. In this case, they made a vest and a miniskirt, respectively.
Thanks to our friends in FRAMING HANLEY for "Stupid Girl".

Click on Brooke blond locks, and stare wide-eyed at the screen for a while

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Thursday Links: BMW Burnout Fail, Formerly Famous Funbags, Angelina Jolie and Johnny Depp??? KISS in a London Nightclub, TRIVIUM digs GOD OF WAR, Vale

THAT's TERRIBLE:

(but the way your breath smells IS, so have a mint, whydontya?)

So, uhh... if you're going to be doing donuts with your buddy in his cheesy yellow BMW...




Buckle up, or... fall out and get run over.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:





These boobs were famous for five minutes (Drunken Stepfather)



This is going to be tough...considering the only thing you'll remember are her boobs... and maybe a song.





Angelina Jolie and Johnny Depp are having an affair! (no they are NOT) (WWTDD)



Also... Angelina Jolie's Boobs are AMAZING (yes they ARE)



Top Ten Supercars of the Last Decade (Bullz-Eye)



Raylene Richards goes by many names. We just call her 'Bosoms' (FreakshowPlanet)



How to Stay Awake for 72 Hours Straight (The Campus Throne)



Daisy West sends our Peter North... get it? (z0d)



100 pictures of Rachel Reynolds (The Price Is Right/Venus Model & WAG) (Don Chavez)



Kagney Linn Karter... 3 names. 2 huge boobs. (Dailyniner)



Finally, A Fight In Women's B'Ball (With Leather)



The Langugage of Johnny Depp Mash-Up (Moviefone)



Obamourage - We Are So Screwed (atom)



DIE: HARDLY WORKING (College Humor)



30 Pictures of Dogs in Costumes (Banned In Hollywood)





I'M SORRY:

(Sorry that you never developed emotionally beyond the age of two. It's OK. It happens. With DOGS, usually)

The guys in TRVIUM released a track exclusively for GOD OF WAR III:



...and that's just a picture of a TV...with GOD OF WAR III on it.

Putting KISS in a tiny club in London...



Is like putting 100 wigs in a 5 wig bag. Get it? Wig reference?

Who knew you could use fishnets for something other than catching mackerel? Crissy Moran figured it out:



Well, for a minute or so. Then she loses the skirt.

Sometimes a gal just has to get free from her itchy bikini...



If your name is Valentina Vaughn then it happens A LOT.

Tired of the same old Barbie doll-looking types? Say hi to DORS FELINE.



Busty, British, Tattooed, Multi-colored hair, alterna-rock girl who isn't the least bit shy. For those of you who need something different.

Busty, blond, BISEXUAL Femme, who you have seen in countless FOUNDRY CAMS videos, fires up her fantastic body in this new clip with music by George Lynch (ex-DOKKEN) and our buds in LYNCH MOB:







CLICK ON FEMME's BEAUTIFUL BISEXUAL BODY...and have a bib handy

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?


We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did



FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing



Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates



be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep



We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.



We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.



We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.



FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.