Your old lady is looking, Glass Door vs. Bald Head, Undies at the Oscars, SLAYER in Australia, AARON LEWIS in Connecticut, MEGAN FOX in a jeans commercial... without jeans?

Your marriage might be on the rocks when you find out your old lady is posing photos like this online.

You might want to nip that in the bud or at least start hitting on other women online...you know, tits for tat and all. (yes, I meant to type 'tits')

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Just like this year's Academy Awards. What a snooze-fest. Oof)

It's just another quiet day in a local jewelry store...

When your day gets interrupted by a glass door you really wish you secured to a cabinet takes out your scalp.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:

(Unlike this year's Oscars... yes, we're going to beat that into the ground)


who was one of a million actresses to wear her underwear to the Oscars? (Drunken Stepfather)

Let's see, what kind of hint could we give... if you don't think of this one fast, you're going to be furious, amigo


Doing the Math: Here’s How CBS Can Subtract Sheen and Still Come Up With “Two and a Half Men” (FreakShow Planet)

Car Review: 2011 Nissan Xterra (Bullz-Eye)

Alexa Nicole has great ... earrings. Yeah, that's what you're looking at. (z0d)

Jasmine Foxx. No relation to Jaime Foxx... is sitting on the counter sans-undies. We hope someone disinfected those tiles (Daily Niner)



I'M SORRY:
(Sorry you stayed up to watch this year's Academy Awards... getting tired of that line yet?)

SLAYER are the best bunch of thrash metal old farts E V A R:

This was in Australia over the weekend, and EXODUS guitarist Gary Holt is filling in for Jeff Hanneman, who lost a leg in a folding couch mishap. Umm, that's a lie.

STAIND frontman Aaron Lewis was in Connecticut with a rather large slide guitar player:

Aaron entertained the crowd. Chubster entertained the idea of eating a few chickens.

From Shoe-staring to Bosom-ogling, we bring you the following announcement:

Saaay, is that MEGAN FOX in a commercial for Armani Jeans?

If so, someone might want to tell her it's a jeans commercial. She's not wearing any. Jeans, that is.

If you had Double-D cans like Katerina Hartlova, you'd take a break from cooking to fondle yourself with a carrot.

Don't act like you wouldn't. We know you WOULD. Shut up. You're a liar. You WOULD.

The lovely and sort-of talented Carmella Bing has a whole rack full of sex toys... but she opts for... A Banana??

Sure, why go with the sterilized plastic vibrator when you can shove an aphid-covered Banana up yer butt. Not too many lights on in her attic.

Speaking of FOUNDRY CAMS... let's lookee here...

If Emma Ink looks familiar, that's because she's been in other FOUNDRY CAMS clips before (these girls change their names like they're changing their panties, for crying out loud). She's tattooed up and would be the perfect trophy to add to the back of your motorcycle... if you're into that kind of thing. Thanks to our friends in FURNAZE for the friendly music.
Thanks to Jon for the editing, as always.

Watch the vid. Get all excited... then get yourself on over to Emma-Ink.com and watch Emma LIVE, on webcam, getting naked and dirty just for you. (and we do mean JUST for you, because she'll do the private VIP thing if you want)




...and that, friends... is the way you don't pay attention to the Academy Awards... Had enough yet?

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Wednesday Links: Oblivious Old Woman, Windsor Guard Pukes, Mary Carey's fun-sized bags, Megan Fox ain't a slut, New SLASH and MEGADETH videos

It's Hump Day, kids! find a fancy, refined, married woman...and start HUMPING!



Married women need love too, and you're just the person to give it out!



THAT's TERRIBLE:

(but the way your breath smells IS, so have a mint, whydontya?)

Want to see the most OBLIVIOUS old woman on the planet?




The store is being ROBBED. She has no idea.

This guard in front of Windor Palace must have had a rough night:




Projectile vomiting WHILE marching? Well done, old chap!

Mary Carey has obnoxious boobs (Drunken Stepfather)



But who cares...because she really knows how to use them... in her movies... which are not suitable for minors.





Megan Fox says she's not a slut (WWTDD)



However... She really does enjoy playing one in the movies!



Featured Model: Rali Ivanova (Bullz-Eye)



Mindy Main has Massive (fake) Melons (FreakshowPlanet)



Is it worth using Viagara if you don't need it? (The Campus Throne)



Nikita Valentin... is very naked...in the woods. Watch out for poison ivy! (z0d)



50 spoilers in 4 minutes (Inside Movies)



Asian Lesbian Babes and a lot of Candy bracelets (Dailyniner)



Forget Beer Pong -- Turtle Racing Is the Newest Bar Trend (Asylum)



20 Horrifyingly Awesome Velvet Paintings (FunnyCrave)



6 Most Memorable REAL WORLD departures (UPROXX)



Our buddy Robert Kelly with Kevin Nealon at the Laugh Factory:





I'M SORRY:

(Sorry that you never developed emotionally beyond the age of two. It's OK. It happens. With DOGS, usually)

The guest lineup for the new SLASH album is more impressive than this year's Grammy's:



Fucking OZZY OSBOURNE and SLASH, just working out ideas.

The semi-reunited MEGADETH (David Ellefson rejoined on 2/8/2010) kicked off the Rest In Peace 20th Anniversary Tour in Spokane:



That would be Dave Mustaine behind that big red mop of hair.

The lovely, New York-born Ivy Black has a big bottle of baby oil:



and a big-ass hardwood floor. Someone's going to get hurt.

What's the best thing about all the topless beaches in Europe?



Gee, let's think about this...could it be...ALL THE TOPLESS WOMEN?!?! Um, yeah.

Everyone say "howdy" to 20 year-old Czech Beauty KAMI...she must be a cowgirl. You know, cuz of the hat.



Who else wears pink furry cowboy hats? OK, well EXCEPT for pimps in the late 1970s.

Busty, blond, BISEXUAL Femme, who you have seen in countless FOUNDRY CAMS videos, fires up her fantastic body in this new clip with music by George Lynch (ex-DOKKEN) and our buds in LYNCH MOB:







CLICK ON FEMME's BEAUTIFUL BISEXUAL BODY...and have a bib handy

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?


We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did



FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing



Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates



be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep



We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.



We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.



We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.



FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Wednesday Links: Mid-week affairs and the Dancing Bear, Electrocuted Exploded Watermelon, Link Love, EUROPE acoustic, METALLICA and LEMMY LIVE in Nashville, Megan Fox Lesbian Kiss

Happy Hump day, folks... now go hump an attractive co-worker.

Pay no mind to those creepy HR people... They're probably boning in the supply closet too...when they're not reprimanding YOU for doing it.

For you guys who think that the girl in the cubicle next to you is too pure for that kind of thing... make room for the Dancing Bear.

He's fearless and he'll take on the whole secretarial pool...his fuzzy hands will be all over their asses.

THAT's TERRIBLE:

What do you get when you cross a watermelon with a high-voltage capacitor?

A Goddamn exploded watermelon. Now don't ask stupid questions.

THAT's NOT-SO TERRIBLE:
(But your condescending mouth is, so shut up before someone nails your lips shut)

Megan Fox in Rolling Stone magazine *picks up jaw from floor* (Drunken Stepfather) ...and here's Megan Fox getting all naked and stuff

Faye Reagan... Looks better than Ronald Reagan naked. (Daily Niner)

On the Mike: 2009 MTV Video Music Awards (Bullz-Eye)

Samantha Hill Peels off Her Purple Bikini (z0d)

Lawns of the Future: 9 Sci-Fi Lawn and Garden Tools (Funnycrave)

The Best Hip-Hop Memes -- When Rap Humor Goes Viral (Street Level)

NFL Players Mentor Troubled Detroit Lions (Dave & Thomas)

Annette Dawn...we could stare at her from dusk till Dawn (Freakshow Planet)

Sons Of Anarchy: Just The Badass Parts (Warming Glow)

Bottle Discipline: The Boy Scout (atom)

Who Is Hotter - NFL Cheerleader Edition (Tastybooze)

Hot Girls + Violins = Awesome SYSTEM OF A DOWN cover (College Humor)

Today in Samurai News (Recall)

Concussion Can't Stop the Breakdancer (Break)

What your favorite fighter says about you (Cage Potato)

The Sexy Dance That Got Maria Jose Lopez Fired (DJMICK)

I'M SORRY:
(Actually, we're not sorry. You suck at life, and you'll die lonely and broke)

Presenting the ONLY reason to go see Jennifer's Body this weekend: the Megan Fox lesbian kiss!

Excuse us, the Megan Fox / Amanda Seyfried Lesbian Kiss.

Take a look at 22 year-old, sexy Czech Perla:

Her lingerie is see-through, but not transparent enough, apparently. She drops it like a bad habit.

It's The Final Countdown...almost... with EUROPE, unplugged on Swedish TV:

Joey Tempest, Mic Michaeli, and John Norum perform "New Love In Town" and their older hit "Superstitious".

Aww shit, Lemmy Kilmister jumped on stage at the Sommet Center in Nashville to jam with METALLICA - who are touring now:

Get those Goddamn METALLICA tickets!

Now let's all lust after the ladies of FOUNDRY CAMS, like Maiya, Sweet Victoria, Kyra, and a slew of others grinding their asses in a Grinhouse-style tribute to our buds in SCUM OF THE EARTH:

CLICK ON MAIYA, DAMN YOU!

(and now to recap... for the people with frontal labotomies. US included.)

Take a break from boning your roommate's fiancé and check what we added to the MEDIA SECTION:

METALLICA and MOTÖRHEAD's Lemmy Kilmister LIVE in Nashville
Perla Peels Off Her Lace Lingerie
Watermelon vs. High Voltage Capacitor
Megan Fox and Amanda Seyfried Lesbian Kiss
EUROPE: 'New Love In Town' and 'Superstitious' Acoustic Live

 

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Facebook: FoundryMusic
Posterous: FOUNDRY
Twitter: FoundryMusic (you can get updates to your cell phone here as well)
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NING: FoundryMusic
FRIEND FEED: FoundryMusic
Break.com: NSFW videos (we put all the dirty vids in one location)
LiveVideo: FoundryMusic (updated daily)

 

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