Your mom on a Lamborghini, Making money like a Rock Star, OZZY vs Ghoul Attorney, Kim Kardashian's Arse (again), New DEF LEPPARD single, Mary Carey

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Birthday fun, Split Tongue Gal, DEAD ISLAND trailer, Latest TRANSFORMERS trailer, Jim Breuer and Sebastian Bach Screaming, SLASH and Brad Whitford Jamming, Lisa Ann Groping

Looking for a fun way to spend a special day, like ...uh, say... a birthday?

Get a birthday cake with a candle and blow it out by yourself in the bathroom. or surf some personal ads looking for some strange woman to make the sexy-sexy with...whichever you choose. It's your day, you know.

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(So is your face. Stop breaking mirrors, assface)

Truthfully, we're having a hard time deciding how this is anything other than awesome...

She's got a split tongue = She's God's gift to girlfriends everywhere. C'mon. How is she NOT?

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:

(unlike your contribution to society, waste of space)

The latest trailer for TRANSFORMERS: Dark Of The Moon has hit the web:

And this could be the most gloomy TRANSFORMERS flick ever. God, we hope so. That last one was kind of a stinker.

Speaking of amazing trailers, there are some folks in Hollywood who could take a lesson from this trailer for DEAD ISLAND:

The game might suck (we have NO idea; it's not even finished yet) but if the trailer is any indication... it's going to be pretty F-ing awesome.

Which Jersey Girl is as Classy as you might suspect? (Drunken Stepfather)



Madison Ivy is the kind of Poison that's just fine to get covered in (FreakShow Planet)

12 Great Shows that were set in and Around High School (Bullz-Eye)

Tammi and Melissa are awfully fine and awfully friendly... awfully (z0d)

Danni Kalifornia is Stunning in any state, not just... oh wait, that's her last name (Daily Niner)



I'M SORRY:
(Sorry that the only friend you have is that bottle of Jack you cozy up to every night.)

SLASH and AEROSMITH's Brad Whitford spent some quality time in North Carolina the other day:

Doing an Aerosmith cover of a Rufus Thomas song... and now our heads are spinning because that was like a 'Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon' thing going on there.

Jim Breuer and SEBASTIAN BACH had a little competition to see who could blow his voice out quickest:

No, not really... but we're having a hard time seeing how that wasn't the end result.

...Hey now... where's the GIRLS? Oh. Here they are

Tory Lane is about as subtle as a train wreck as she seduces this nice officer:

Then again, when did you ever hear of anything subtle in a smut video? Exactly. NEVER.

If you had a body like Lisa Ann...

You'd be feeling yourself up nonstop too. Don't even act like you wouldn't, Chesterfield.

If Emma Ink looks familiar, that's because she's been in other FOUNDRY CAMS clips before (these girls change their names like they're changing their panties, for crying out loud). She's tattooed up and would be the perfect trophy to add to the back of your motorcycle... if you're into that kind of thing. Thanks to our friends in FURNAZE for the friendly music.
Thanks to Jon for the editing, as always.

Watch the vid. Get all excited... then get yourself on over to Emma-Ink.com and watch Emma LIVE, on webcam, getting naked and dirty just for you. (and we do mean JUST for you, because she'll do the private VIP thing if you want)




...and that, friends... is how we say "Beat it, monkeybrain"

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

R.I.P. Greg Giraldo and Tony Curtis, How Not to win Portuguese Idol, BUSH is back, SOUNDGARDEN too, VINCE NEIL and ANTHRAX are still alive, Hustler's AVATAR parody, Carmen Kees, Michelle Monaghan

Hey-O! Call down to front desk and have them send up an army of maids:

This is the 'before' shot... the 'After' shot was filled with a few very sloppy married people. Adultery + Hotel Room = Time for Maids.

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(but not as bad as your hangover breath. Here's a mint, deadmouth)

Rest in Peace, buddy. We'll miss you:

Greg Giraldo. Dead at 44.

You want to impress the judges on Portuguese Idol?:

You might want to re-think belting out that TRIVIUM song.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:



Top 5 Female Tony Curtis Conquests (R.I.P. sir) (Drunken Stepfather)

You're so never gonna get this one even if we tell you that she dated Brett Ratner for a while... See? You still have no clue who it is.

KRACKOON. A raccoon on crack. Duh. (HEAVY)

Recipes For Success #8 – Giving Back (FunnyCrave)

Oh her name's Amanda Corey...she's kinda... um, uh...wait, what? (Freakshow Planet)

Best Cheerleader Pics from NFL's Week 3 (Scores Report)

the 50 Hottest German Women (BroBible)

When the mood hits your eye like a big Pizza Pie...Alexis Amore... heh, get it? (z0d)

How To Beat up Bigfoot (Maxim)

Andi San Dimas has her whole hand in her...whoa. (Dailyniner)

I'M SORRY:
(Sorry that you'll be riding the coattails of your drinking buddy until you get booted out.)

Alterna-grunge sex symbol Gavin Rossdale has re-formed BUSH:

...and apparently A LOT of people care about it.

Speaking of Grunge, SOUNDGARDEN played on a replica of the CBGB stage at the Paramount Studios back-lot in Los Angeles:

It was for the GUITAR HERO: Warriors Of Rock release party. Hey Activision! Back up the BRINKS truck!

Kicking it back a decade, our pal VINCE NEIL tried tearing through one of MOTLEY CRUE's classic songs:

But the audience mostly heard clicking and buzzing noises. See, cuz Vince's voice is shot. Umm, yeah.

Hey... why not forget about that lame attempt at wit and pick up Vince Neil's new book?

What do people in New Orleans love more than throwing up on Bourbon Street? ANTHRAX! (uh, the band...not the white powder):

We'll always wonder what the hell that thing is on Joey Belladonna's head. It's not hair. It's some kind of feather configuration.

From thrash to ...umm...something that rhymes with 'thrash'

Those wonderful folks at HUSTLER bring us This Ain't AVATAR XXX:

Who needs expensive CGI when you have a set of rubber ears and a shitload of blue paint?

sexy Czech babe Carmen Kees doesn't need much of an excuse to peel off her bikini:

ooh! A Waterfall! Oh...no. here we go again. Someone get her a robe.

Busty young PLAYBOY babe Eve Jewell is making some office furniture feel very lucky:

Stupid lucky office furniture.

So, you like breast meat, do you Doc? Michelle Monaghan has a whole lot of it for you:

She left her dress a little...eh, "Open".

...and that, kids... is how we wrap up today's big-ass burrito of fun....

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Gary Coleman Died, Luckiest Ukrainian Woman, Kendra's video is all over the Interwebs, Stone Temple Pilots on Kimmel, Jeff Scott Soto Honors DIO, Lisa Ann, Stacy DaSilva, and Tolpess Tennis with Shannon

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Dio is Dead, Cyclist vs Car, Inside a Tornado, Kendra is Behind the Sex Tape, Jenna Bentley and Creepy Old Guy, QUEENSRYCHE and the Chunky Dominatrix, CHICKENFOOT's New Video, Veronica Saint's Lucky Thong, Jayden James Topless Car Ride, New Carmen Video

Shake off that Monday morning hangover and wake up the drunk woman in the bathtub

Don't worry. Just get her home before her husband wakes up and then you can do it again next weekend...have an affair. Live it up a little!

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Kind of like chili and beer farts, but only worse, because they're coming out of you)

RIP Ronnie James Dio, who lost his battle with stomach cancer yesterday morning.


Click the pic to see Dio in healthier times, during his April 2007 visit to the Opie and Anthony Show.

A British Cyclist and His Brand New Helmet-Cam go out for a ride:


And get bounced off the hood of an old woman's car.

This video taken INSIDE of a Tornado in Norman, Oklahoma...


Will give you one more reason to never move to Norman, Oklahoma.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:


Kendra is Behind the release of her Sex Tape...Part 4 (WWTDD)

Holy crap, could this be more transparent? Just let VIVID release the video later this month, make your money, and be done with it. Stop acting all wounded.


Playboy Playmate Jenna Bentley Rolling Around on a Beach with a creepy old guy (Drunken Stepfather)

And any creepy old guy who can afford the company of PLAYBOY models is a friend of ours!

Kimbo Slice: Does The UFC Need A New One? (AskMen)

Brilliant Ads For Canadian Porn Channel (Video SFW) (Warming Glow)

Shannon Stewart Shows off Her Smokin' Hot Body (Freakshow Planet)

Girl Next Door: Olinda Cataneda (Bullz-Eye)

Bambi and Ariel are Touching Tongues and Mid-Sections (Dailyniner)

Arguing the Merits of the Doubledown With Rachel Ray (FunnyCrave)

Saving serious dough time: Here is your "Best Time to Buy" guide for 35 products guys need (The Bachelor Guy)

Jenna and Her Big Boobs are Crawling All Over the Pool Table (z0d)

Before The Journey Begins: This One Is For The Freshman (The Campus Socialite)

A Tribute to the Muppets' Statler and Waldorf (Gunaxin)


I'M SORRY:
(Sorry all the breath mints on the planet won't clear up that halitosis of yours)

our friends in QUEENSRŸCHE (who are on tour now - click for tickets) have a new Cabaret-style show:

...and they've enlisted the help of a chunky dominatrix to make it more appealing... to chubby chasers.

Those talented guys in CHICKENFOOT have released the FIFTH video from their debut disc:

the band's debut disc has sold over 750k copies! (that's a lot of Tequila)

From Supergroups to super-hot ass

The lovely Veronica Saint is sporting the world's tiniest, luckiest thong:

Of course, Veronica isn't wearing it for long...if you catch our meaning.

Fun-loving, Free-Spirited adult starlet Jayden James is going for a ride with her top down:

Get it? "Top Down"? "Shirt Off"? oh please, like all she's doing is riding around topless... there's a LOT more to see, Chester.

What's this? More fantastic shamless self-promotion?? INDEED!

You know Carmen from her many FOUNDRY CAMS videos and from her solo site - CamWithCarmen. Here's a great clip of her "Unraveling" her clothes to some music by our friends in SEVENDUST:


CLICK THE PIC TO SEE CARMEN STRIP!

Then, when the feeling returns in your arms and legs... chat with Carmen LIVE, one-on-one!

You can also get hundreds of new photos and videos at Carmen's solo site - CamWithCarmen

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.