Your mom likes singles, Escalator Mishap, Britney Spears in V Magazine, CHIMAIRA's Charlie Sheen tribute, MOTORHEAD on Jimmy Fallon, SLASH in Australia

We don't want to alarm you, but we caught your mom at her night job the other evening:

We're responsible for at least ten of the singles she brought home in her butt and the stain she brought home on her shirt... we're gentlemanly when it comes to mothers.

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Just like this year's Academy Awards. What a snooze-fest. Oof)

All you need is Benny Hill music and this video would be PERFECT!

Going Down - Watch your step!

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:

(Unlike this year's Oscars... yes, we're going to beat that into the ground)


Britney Spears is on the cover of V Magazine (Drunken Stepfather)

and the "V" is for "Vapid"... see, cuz it's Britney Spears... and umm, you get it.


Raisa has a terrible name and a great body. This will set off a theme in today's update (FreakShow Planet)

11 Most Addictive Breakfast Cereals (Bullz Eye)

Chantelle Fontaine has a name like a tranny...she's suspect until we see a birth certificate (z0d)

Victoria Rae Black is pasty and white. She really should consider a name change to fit her pasty complexion (Daily Niner)



I'M SORRY:
(Sorry you stayed up to watch this year's Academy Awards... getting tired of that line yet?)

The whole world has Charlie Sheen fever and the guys in CHIMAIRA are no exception:

Presenting a death metal cover of The TROGGS "Wild Thing" in honor of Charlie Sheen's role in MAJOR LEAGUE.

Lemmy and MOTORHEAD were showing off their face bumps in New York City on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon

Singing "Get Back In Line"... and shaking like a leaf. Just watch Lemmy's right arm.

SLASH and Andrew Stockdale from WOLFMOTHER impressed the hell out of everyone in Brisbane:

OK, maybe not EVERYONE. A few people stayed home to drink oil cans of Foster's. And that's how you make a sweeping generalization.

Now, before you get too cultured, here's some BOOBS, and we don't mean your parents... ZING!:

Anyone else think Tommie Jo is a lousy name?

Us too. Booooo, Tommie Jo. Your name sucks.

Speaking of awful names, Cali Lakai probably got picked on a lot when she was a kid.

hence the need to take her clothes off for attention. Of course we're guessing. We have no concrete information.

Switching gears (kind of)... let's lookee here...

If Emma Ink looks familiar, that's because she's been in other FOUNDRY CAMS clips before (these girls change their names like they're changing their panties, for crying out loud). She's tattooed up and would be the perfect trophy to add to the back of your motorcycle... if you're into that kind of thing. Thanks to our friends in FURNAZE for the friendly music.
Thanks to Jon for the editing, as always.

Watch the vid. Get all excited... then get yourself on over to Emma-Ink.com and watch Emma LIVE, on webcam, getting naked and dirty just for you. (and we do mean JUST for you, because she'll do the private VIP thing if you want)




...and that, friends... is the way you don't pay attention to the Academy Awards... Had enough yet?

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Bull jumps into crowd, Kim Kardashian's Ass Eats Chairs, MOTORHEAD in NYC, DUFF and STEVEN ADLER in London, New music from SHAKRA, Dominno, Mandy Dee, Christy Marks, and their Double-D's

When was the last time you saw four asses that weren't in a police lineup? *rimshot*.

Actually, we found a photo of your MILF mother and her friends looking for love in all the wrong places...or the RIGHT ones, if you're on the receiving end. Tell your mom she's got a nice dumper, by the way.

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Just like this year's Academy Awards. What a snooze-fest. Oof)

Why would ANYONE sit in the front row at a rodeo?

Seems only obvious that you'd get sprayed will bull snot and mauled by a bull if you were this close, no? Serves you right, ya redneck.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:

(Unlike this year's Oscars... yes, we're going to beat that into the ground)


Kim Kardashian's ass eats chairs (Drunken Stepfather)

It wasn't so long ago that... Kim's ass was eating RAY J, if you catch our meaning


Dating Tips from Charlie Sheen (How About We)

Eufrat has a strange-ass (FreakShow Planet)

NFL Scouting Combine Thoughts: Quarterbacks (Scores Report)

Anna Lynn Cruz is Caressing her Cooch... not to put too fine a point on it (z0d)

Liz Ashley is all kinds of pasty-white on the outside, but her insides are all kinds of wonderful (Daily Niner)



I'M SORRY:
(Sorry you stayed up to watch this year's Academy Awards... getting tired of that line yet?)

There was almost a GUNS 'N ROSES reunion with DUFF McKAGAN and STEVEN ADLER in London:

Now we just have to get AXL and SLASH in a room together...and who are we kidding? That's never gonna happen.

...and look who else was jamming together. If it ain't MOTORHEAD and DORO PESCH...together at last!

Oh who are we kidding? Does anyone really care if Doro showed up? Lemmy on the other hand, is God.

...and what can you say about a band like SHAKRA?

Quite frankly, nothing until this morning, because we never gave a shit. This single pretty much rocks though, so now we care.

From Swedish headbangers to swinging moo-cow udders:

What's better than watching two non-English speakers like Dominno and Mandy Dee making out?

Absolutely nothing. Well, maybe ice cream. Yeah, ice cream is pretty badass.

Is that Christy Marks twirling a baton?

Oh please, like WE know. If she didn't have enormous boobs, she'd be another nameless dope in the endless pile of nameless dopes.

Switching gears (kind of)... let's lookee here...

If Emma Ink looks familiar, that's because she's been in other FOUNDRY CAMS clips before (these girls change their names like they're changing their panties, for crying out loud). She's tattooed up and would be the perfect trophy to add to the back of your motorcycle... if you're into that kind of thing. Thanks to our friends in FURNAZE for the friendly music.
Thanks to Jon for the editing, as always.

Watch the vid. Get all excited... then get yourself on over to Emma-Ink.com and watch Emma LIVE, on webcam, getting naked and dirty just for you. (and we do mean JUST for you, because she'll do the private VIP thing if you want)




...and that, friends... is the way you don't pay attention to the Academy Awards... Had enough yet?

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Fitness MILF, Vince Neil looks tipsy AGAIN, old ta-ta's, SEVENDUST beefs up the Atlanta Falcons, MOTORHEAD has a new video, DANGEROUS TOYS is milking the same material, Cynthia Bang Bangs, Lexi Belle and the Lucky Feather Duster

She's ripped, she's in fantastic shape... but she's oh-so lonely because her old man is always working late.

Now's your chance to make your move, bud... Hell, she wouldn't be posting photos online unless she wanted to hook up... well, that and show off her abs.

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Just like the amount of space your girthy ass takes up when you sit down. Here's a treadmill. Happy birthday.)

MOTLEY CRUE frontman VINCE NEIL was spotted leaving Boa in West Hollywood looking at li'l bit tipsy with a few lovely ladies...

Big deal, right? Well, watch the video, listen to him slurring his words, and then jump behind the wheel of a sports car. Ahh yes, some people don't learn easily, do they?

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:


Ack! Old lady boobs! We're almost afraid to ask who they belong to... (Drunken Stepfather)

As far as guessing goes... She hasn't had much skin time on camera... so that could throw a few of you.

The Ultimate Bacon Lovers Gift Guide (the Bachelor Guy)

Bullz-Eye.com 2010 Year End Music Review (Bullz-Eye)

Got pregnant? Got Fat? You Gotta Get this book! (Muscle Sorority)

Sandy Summers will warm you up on a cold winter day...with her umm, boobies? (FreakShow Planet)

Wowee! We could watch Laura Lee get naked every day! (z0d)

When shawna Lenee isn't going batshit crazy, she likes to have girl-girl sexy time with girls like Ruby (Dailyniner)


I'M SORRY:
(Sorry to hear that your hefty carcass keeps breaking the lawn furniture every time you sit down.)

The guys in SEVENDUST were called in to beef up the Atlanta Falcons official theme song...

...and that's exactly what they did, dagnabbit.

Lemmmy Kilmister, his face bumps, and the rest of MOTORHEAD have a new video for "Get Back In Line"

The band's new album gets released in the UK this month. We U.S. pukes don't get it until January. The new tunes will put goosebumps on your face bumps.

Hey, more power to you if you can pull it off, because DANGEROUS TOYS have been milking the same few songs for twenty years:

Honestly, we'd think they'd be tired of playing "Teas'n Pleas'n" and "Scared" by now, but apparently not.

OK, that's enough of the high-brow (and yes, by comparison to what we're about to show you, that IS high-brow)

Mellissa wants to show Sammie Rhodes and Samantha Saint how to do the whole ballet thing...

...but the whole event degenerates into a bisexual ballet bonanza in NO time.

We weren't fond of it at first, but Cynthia Bang has a very bang-able booty and she's not afraid to use it:

What she SHOULD do is tell that obnoxious camera guy to shut up. He's reallly yapping too much. shaddup and get to the butt sex

her name is Lexi Belle and she apparently doesn't care who sees her naked ass because that's her, getting nude...on a balcony:

What's more is that is one very very lucky feather duster ... what we wouldn't give to be a piece of lint on that thing.

Our busty blond pal Gisele, who you have seen in countless FOUNDRY CAMS videos as well as her own site GOT GISELE, has returned to help us promote Retooled, the new FOUNDRY EP, available at all major online outlets. In the clip, Gisele makes some creative use out of a long shiny black light, while shaking her semi-clothed body to FOUNDRY's "Black Lights, Bright City" (Retooled by Rich DeCicco).
Thanks to Rich for the great remake. Thanks to Jon for the amazing editing, and thanks to Gisele for the rockin' bod.



Click on Gisele's impressive rack, then rock out with some FOUNDRY.
When your jaw stops swinging open, Go visit her at Got Gisele
...you can also Chat with Gisele LIVE on her cam

...and that, kids... is how we wrap up today's big-ass-salad of funs....

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Chubby gals need love too, Nic Cage's New Movie, METALLICA Guitarist plays soccer with kid's face, Lemmy Knows How to Die, RATT knows how to fade into obscurity, Corey Taylor knows how to dress like a woman

OK, we'll be realists for a moment... not every gal you meet online is going to be a winner...

But who gives a shit? the bigger gals DO try harder. And YES, we're proud to say we know from experience.

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(But your sense of aim really sucks. How hard IS it to blow your brains out when you're drunk?)

What do you get when you give Kirk Hammett from METALLICA a big black beach ball?

You get to see him use a little kid in Australia for a goal post. SCORE!

The band is out promoting Metallica/Slayer/Megadeth/Anthrax: The Big 4 - Live from Sofia, Bulgaria, which by the way, we just ordered.
THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:
OK, We lied. It IS...

Is seems that NICOLAS CAGE has gone and made another film no one is going to care about:

Meh, it's OK... They can't ALL be GHOST RIDER...and yes that movie RULED!

Heels, Stockings, Nice ass. Anyone want to guess? (Drunken Stepfather)

Well friends, if you saw her in CHLOE, you don't need to

Featured Model: Allegra Wynne (Bullz-Eye)

Nikki Jayne knows how to wear...and NOT wear...shorts (FreakShow Planet)

Honestly, will someone tell Susana Spears to just not even bring clothing next time? (z0d)

Shera Bechard knows a thing or three about showering (Dailyniner)


I'M SORRY:
(Someday... Love will find you... break those chains that...oh wait, no it won't, asshole.)

Lemmy, MOTORHEAD, and all of his face bumps want you to check out "I Know How To Die", which is (we think) based on his ability to consume Jack Daniels:

They're about to release the face-bumping-fest The World Is Yours, which we ordered the the classic rock version of.

Yes, because we're SNOBS.

That's it. Corey Taylor from STONE SOUR is officially the Ugliest. Tranny. Ever:

Then again, it was a halloween show. They're out promoting Audio Secrecy to the legions of lunatics. Us being some of them.

You know, RATT used to be able to fill arenas ... like 20 years ago:

Now they're in New York, playing on the smallest. stage... EVER. However, Infestation did sell a decent amount of copies.

AND from RATT we move to RACKS!

Her namme is JEWELS JADE and she's enjoying some vibrator time in the sauna:

Normally we wouldn't be so concerned but please watch your fluids, madam

To say that Nikki Benz has big boobs is a bit of an understatement.

But they're damn big and she seems to have to hold them up a lot.

Her name is Carmen Croft and she's soaping up her huge Czech boobs in the shower.

That, friends...is ALL the information you need

Holy Indian Hotness Priya Anjali Rai is showing her objection to biknis publicly by stripping hers off.

Away with you, vile bikini! There's diddling to be done!

Chad Smith (RED HOT CHILI PEPPERS, CHICKENFOOT) and his funk-rock band, CHAD SMITH's BOMBASTIC MEATBATS (Jeff Kollman, Kevin Chown, Ed Roth, and of course, Chad Smith) just dropped a new album titled 'More Meat' and they were saintly enough to give us the track "The Gunboat is On!"... we thought it only appropriate to have our own brown-haired, brown-eyed, BISEXUAL FOUDNRY CAMS babe Natasha do up a video for them. What you see here, folks, is the fruits of that



Click Natasha's Nicely-formed Hiney. then regain your composure and click on on over to FOUNDRY CAMS and chat with Natasha LIVE...and Naked... (YOU naked, HER naked, it's all good)
Of course, once you cool off a little, carry your carcass on over to FOUNDRY CAMS where you can chat with Natasha LIVE on cam for hours on end.

...and that, kids... is how we wrap up today's big-ass-salad of funs....

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.