Birthday fun, Split Tongue Gal, DEAD ISLAND trailer, Latest TRANSFORMERS trailer, Jim Breuer and Sebastian Bach Screaming, SLASH and Brad Whitford Jamming, Lisa Ann Groping

Looking for a fun way to spend a special day, like ...uh, say... a birthday?

Get a birthday cake with a candle and blow it out by yourself in the bathroom. or surf some personal ads looking for some strange woman to make the sexy-sexy with...whichever you choose. It's your day, you know.

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(So is your face. Stop breaking mirrors, assface)

Truthfully, we're having a hard time deciding how this is anything other than awesome...

She's got a split tongue = She's God's gift to girlfriends everywhere. C'mon. How is she NOT?

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:

(unlike your contribution to society, waste of space)

The latest trailer for TRANSFORMERS: Dark Of The Moon has hit the web:

And this could be the most gloomy TRANSFORMERS flick ever. God, we hope so. That last one was kind of a stinker.

Speaking of amazing trailers, there are some folks in Hollywood who could take a lesson from this trailer for DEAD ISLAND:

The game might suck (we have NO idea; it's not even finished yet) but if the trailer is any indication... it's going to be pretty F-ing awesome.

Which Jersey Girl is as Classy as you might suspect? (Drunken Stepfather)



Madison Ivy is the kind of Poison that's just fine to get covered in (FreakShow Planet)

12 Great Shows that were set in and Around High School (Bullz-Eye)

Tammi and Melissa are awfully fine and awfully friendly... awfully (z0d)

Danni Kalifornia is Stunning in any state, not just... oh wait, that's her last name (Daily Niner)



I'M SORRY:
(Sorry that the only friend you have is that bottle of Jack you cozy up to every night.)

SLASH and AEROSMITH's Brad Whitford spent some quality time in North Carolina the other day:

Doing an Aerosmith cover of a Rufus Thomas song... and now our heads are spinning because that was like a 'Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon' thing going on there.

Jim Breuer and SEBASTIAN BACH had a little competition to see who could blow his voice out quickest:

No, not really... but we're having a hard time seeing how that wasn't the end result.

...Hey now... where's the GIRLS? Oh. Here they are

Tory Lane is about as subtle as a train wreck as she seduces this nice officer:

Then again, when did you ever hear of anything subtle in a smut video? Exactly. NEVER.

If you had a body like Lisa Ann...

You'd be feeling yourself up nonstop too. Don't even act like you wouldn't, Chesterfield.

If Emma Ink looks familiar, that's because she's been in other FOUNDRY CAMS clips before (these girls change their names like they're changing their panties, for crying out loud). She's tattooed up and would be the perfect trophy to add to the back of your motorcycle... if you're into that kind of thing. Thanks to our friends in FURNAZE for the friendly music.
Thanks to Jon for the editing, as always.

Watch the vid. Get all excited... then get yourself on over to Emma-Ink.com and watch Emma LIVE, on webcam, getting naked and dirty just for you. (and we do mean JUST for you, because she'll do the private VIP thing if you want)




...and that, friends... is how we say "Beat it, monkeybrain"

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Ember Reigns Rocks Out with Foundry "What Kills Me"

Busty Beautiful uninhibited Ember Reigns, who you have seen in countless FOUNDRY CAMS videos as well as her own hardcore site, took a shine to our latest release, FOUNDRY: Retooled (feat. Rich DeCicco) and the song "What Kills Me" (click the link to download the song now). So much so, that she rolled around naked while singing the song. Hot Girl. Hot song. What else could you ask for (except for her phone number, which we're not giving you)
Thanks to Jon for the editing as always



Click on Ember's outstanding body... if you have regained your motor functions back, and download some FOUNDRY.
When you can see straight again, Go visit Ember Reigns at her official site
...you can also Chat with LIVE on cam

Like we mentioned. No phone number... but we'll give you access to see her totally nekkid... which is even better, because you get exactly what you want. Amiright? Amiright?

Bands and labels, if you want YOUR music featued in a FOUNDRY CAMS video, you should send your CDs and press kits to:

FoundryMusic
c/o DFL MEDIA, LLC
PO Box 257
Millington, NJ
07946


You can pick up Retooled by FOUNDRY at the following online music outlets:
iTunes:


Amazon

Napster

It's everywhere. It's like AIDS. Without the weight loss and death.

YOu can also check out Ember Reigns in these fantastical videos:

Ember Reigns is a Sexy Little Sister
Ember Reigns Licks Her Lollipop
'Next Time Around' with Ember Reigns
Ember Reigns Viorotica, and Gisele Topless Montage
Ember Reigns teases in a tiny bikini


OK, that's all you get for now. Beat it. Scram. Vamos!

don't you have music to purchase?

Chubby gals need love too, Nic Cage's New Movie, METALLICA Guitarist plays soccer with kid's face, Lemmy Knows How to Die, RATT knows how to fade into obscurity, Corey Taylor knows how to dress like a woman

OK, we'll be realists for a moment... not every gal you meet online is going to be a winner...

But who gives a shit? the bigger gals DO try harder. And YES, we're proud to say we know from experience.

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(But your sense of aim really sucks. How hard IS it to blow your brains out when you're drunk?)

What do you get when you give Kirk Hammett from METALLICA a big black beach ball?

You get to see him use a little kid in Australia for a goal post. SCORE!

The band is out promoting Metallica/Slayer/Megadeth/Anthrax: The Big 4 - Live from Sofia, Bulgaria, which by the way, we just ordered.
THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:
OK, We lied. It IS...

Is seems that NICOLAS CAGE has gone and made another film no one is going to care about:

Meh, it's OK... They can't ALL be GHOST RIDER...and yes that movie RULED!

Heels, Stockings, Nice ass. Anyone want to guess? (Drunken Stepfather)

Well friends, if you saw her in CHLOE, you don't need to

Featured Model: Allegra Wynne (Bullz-Eye)

Nikki Jayne knows how to wear...and NOT wear...shorts (FreakShow Planet)

Honestly, will someone tell Susana Spears to just not even bring clothing next time? (z0d)

Shera Bechard knows a thing or three about showering (Dailyniner)


I'M SORRY:
(Someday... Love will find you... break those chains that...oh wait, no it won't, asshole.)

Lemmy, MOTORHEAD, and all of his face bumps want you to check out "I Know How To Die", which is (we think) based on his ability to consume Jack Daniels:

They're about to release the face-bumping-fest The World Is Yours, which we ordered the the classic rock version of.

Yes, because we're SNOBS.

That's it. Corey Taylor from STONE SOUR is officially the Ugliest. Tranny. Ever:

Then again, it was a halloween show. They're out promoting Audio Secrecy to the legions of lunatics. Us being some of them.

You know, RATT used to be able to fill arenas ... like 20 years ago:

Now they're in New York, playing on the smallest. stage... EVER. However, Infestation did sell a decent amount of copies.

AND from RATT we move to RACKS!

Her namme is JEWELS JADE and she's enjoying some vibrator time in the sauna:

Normally we wouldn't be so concerned but please watch your fluids, madam

To say that Nikki Benz has big boobs is a bit of an understatement.

But they're damn big and she seems to have to hold them up a lot.

Her name is Carmen Croft and she's soaping up her huge Czech boobs in the shower.

That, friends...is ALL the information you need

Holy Indian Hotness Priya Anjali Rai is showing her objection to biknis publicly by stripping hers off.

Away with you, vile bikini! There's diddling to be done!

Chad Smith (RED HOT CHILI PEPPERS, CHICKENFOOT) and his funk-rock band, CHAD SMITH's BOMBASTIC MEATBATS (Jeff Kollman, Kevin Chown, Ed Roth, and of course, Chad Smith) just dropped a new album titled 'More Meat' and they were saintly enough to give us the track "The Gunboat is On!"... we thought it only appropriate to have our own brown-haired, brown-eyed, BISEXUAL FOUDNRY CAMS babe Natasha do up a video for them. What you see here, folks, is the fruits of that



Click Natasha's Nicely-formed Hiney. then regain your composure and click on on over to FOUNDRY CAMS and chat with Natasha LIVE...and Naked... (YOU naked, HER naked, it's all good)
Of course, once you cool off a little, carry your carcass on over to FOUNDRY CAMS where you can chat with Natasha LIVE on cam for hours on end.

...and that, kids... is how we wrap up today's big-ass-salad of funs....

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Thursday Links: Shirtless Moped wipeout, SUV vs. Store front, Make a Dare, Ke$ha's Awful Ass, Bar Refaeli in Lingerie, SLASH has to practice, WINGER

Are the women at work playing footsie with you? turns out they're signing up to affair websites in droves:



Take 'footsie' to the next level! The ladies are making the first move. You finish it up. Sounds like a plan, eh?

THAT's TERRIBLE:

(But your breath is. How's about we wash your mouth out with Bleach?)

Hey kids! What's the quickest way to ensure massive injury when riding a moped?




Go riding shirtless, without shoes, on a busy street, near a rocky ledge... like this Brazilian brain surgeon.

In Russia, suggestion boxes are for suckers:




If you're dissatisfied with customer service at your local retailer, evidently - driving your BMW through the store front is an acceptable reaction.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:



Want to do stupid shit on video and get famous? OF COURSE YOU DO! (Make A Dare)





Ke$ha's Awful ass is in Australia (WWTDD)





Bar Refaeli Looks AMAZING in LIngerie...*drool* (Drunken Stepfather)



The Virgin's Guide to Sex (FunnyCrave)



Jessica Jey has Juggs just right for Juggling...or showing off (Freakshow Planet)



Meet The Cast of 'Hot Tub Time Machine' (Bullz-Eye)



Karlie and Valeria are totally nude and totally friendly (Dailyniner)



Evan and Gareth: Tech Support (atom)



10 Rockstars Throughout The Years – A Photo Gallery Tribute (AfroJacks)



Despite the immediate appearance, Carli and Charlie - both women - are actually being affectionate in these photos (z0d)



Six Ways Journalists Have Used Hollywood’s Playbook (Gunaxin)



10 Worst Time Travel Guides (Comedy)



The 20 Dumbest Pet Inventions Of All Time (Manofest)



15 Creative and Delicious Things You Can Make With Oreos (The Bachelor Guy)





I'M SORRY:

(Sorry that your personality is more likely to get you shot than promoted)

Even fancy people need to rehearse. Just ask SLASH:



He's practicing with his new solo band (minus singer Myles Kennedy - ALTER BRIDGE), getting ready to tour.

Finally. Someone outside of 1990 appreciates the genius that is WINGER ...in London, at least:



We like those guys they let us use their new single in a FOUNDRY CAMS video.

From bands to babes, lookee who it is!

Our gal Gisele is in the kitchen, but she's not cooking a damn thing:



Be sure to check out Gisele's new site for tons of exclusive new clips.

Yay! More fanny!

Ass-tastic adult starlet Mia Rose is lubing up her butt and preparing for a pounding:



For the totally hardcore, check out the full-length Mia Rose clip in BIG WET ASSES #15 - on demand.

Her name is Amber Easton and her tight MILF body once belonged to a fresh-faced noob:



She's like a fine wine... only improving with age.

Let's once again honor our lovely friend GISELE who has done a ton of FOUNDRY CAMS videos for us:






Click on Gisele right now, and watch the full jaw-dropping awesome video!

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?


We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did



FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing



Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates



be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep



We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.



We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.



We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.



FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Sienna West Feels Herself Up

Adult starlet Sienna West feels herself up while gyrating on her big bed. Honestly, we don't blame her. If we looked like that, we'd spend all day feeling ourselves up as well.

read more | digg story

FOUNDRY CAMS: Kylie Rocks Out In Her STAY COZY Shirt

Kylie (click for her profile), one of our leggy blond-haired lovelies from FOUNDRY CAMS was given a new STAY COZY shirt and boy, did she get creative with it... She keeps the shirt on for about 30 seconds before showing off her seriously revealing outfit. Music by our UK buddies VOODOO JOHNSON.







CLICK THE PIC TO SEE THE VIDEO



...and once your blood pressure comes down to a reasonable level, head over to FOUNDRY CAMS and chat with Kylie LIVE on WEBCAM!

FOUNDRY CAMS: Mary Kate Rocks Out In Her STAY COZY shirt

Petite, pretty, pig-tailed Mary Kate from FOUNDRY CAMS is decked out in leopard print lingerie and her STAY COZY shirt, and shaking her amazing ass to music by our friends at THE BANGKOK FIVE.







CLICK THE PIC TO SEE MARY KATE's NEW VIDEO



Once you're done, and you have a bit of fluids left in your body swishing around...head over to FOUNDRY CAMS and chat with Mary Kate LIVE on cam!