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Hello Monday... Is this what your weekend looked like?
If so, then BRAVO, kiddo... you're a master fornicator and deserve a medal for your adulterous adventures. Next week, go for six hookups at once!.
THAT's TERRIBLE:
(just like your people skills. No wait, those are fucking abysmal)
Oh Fuckity-Fuck-Fuck-Fuck-Fuck... Tiger Woods cursed on Live TV (again), and it's international news (again):
We're so unimpressed, that we're going to buy Tiger Woods Golf, play at Home and curse all night.
THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:
New Boobs On RateMyWOW: Thanks again to our pals Yoshi and Brandon Iron, who is constantly shooting content for LOAD MY MOUTH and PERVERTED PLANET (so very not-safe-for-work), we were able to add new bosoms to RateMyWOW today courtesy of FERRERA and ANGELICA BLACK:
RateMyWOW: FERRERA
RateMyWOW: ANGELICA BLACK
Paris Hilton is Topless, In Trouble For Weed Again (WWTDD)
'scuse us, Miss Hilton when are you gonna make another one o' them sex flicks like this one you did?
Katy Perry's Big Boobs in a Bikini (Drunken Stepfather)
UFC Ring Girl Chandra Powell (The Cage Doctors)
PLAYBOY's Christine Veronica has Two Boobs, Two Butt cheeks, Two Long legs...the list goes on (Freakshow Planet)
Featured Model: Shannon Czyz (Bullz-Eye)
'Lens Cap On' Shows You Gorgeous Views as Blocked by a Lens Cap (URLesque)
Angie Savage Has Two Big Wings Tattooed on her Back. Don't fly away, miss! (Dailyniner)
Angry Child Slaps Some Sense Into His Own Mother (The Campus Socialite)
Top 10 Madden Covers (The Pigskin Doctors)
Claire has a Magical Cooter tucked under that thong. Seriously, it shoots glitter. (z0d)
Rise and Shine! -- A Video Guide to the Fine Art of the Wake-Up Prank (Asylum)
“Plumbers Don’t Wear Ties”: Gaming’s First (and Only) Surrealist Softcore Adventure (UPROXX)
Shyamalan Name is the Turd In Audience's Punch Bowl (FilmDrunk)
I'M SORRY:
(Sorry that you define your existence by the individuals you latch onto. Don't cry. Not everyone has self-confidence)
Our friends in CINDERELLA had a bit of a SPINAL TAP moment on stage the other night in New Hampshire:
Nothing like ear-piercing feedback to wreck a live show, eh? Check out CINDERELLA on tour now - before Tom Keifer blows his voice box out again.
and on the opposite end of the spectrum, ROB ZOMBIE is on tour with Mayhem Fest (Click for Tickets, kids), and as usual, likes burning shit on stage:
What IS a Superbeast, anyway? You'll just have to ask Mr Zombie when you see him live.
From smokey stages to smoking hot bodies... Ecch, that was hack...
Sexy Czech Twistys Babe Ashley Bulgari can't stop touching herself, even in the kitchen:
Not that we blame her. If we were attached to that body, we'd be feeling ourselves up all the time. But we're not, so pass the ice cream.
Slovakian stunner Angel Dark is giving language lessons... naked:
It's a new method of osmosis. It's the ass-to-face method of information absorbtion.
Ooh, Push-ups! Why would you ask a piece-of-ass like Jewels Jade to do topless Pushups?
Maybe because you're a dopey cameraman who wants to spend as much time as possible gawking at her before she gets banged nine different ways by a guy twice you size. Yeah, it's an insecure geek thing.
aaaaand what would an update from us be without a beautiful young lady from FOUNDRY CAMS shaking her ass to rock music, which happens to be from DROWNING POOL this time:
Stare into Shanelle's eyes... only for a moment, then Head on over to FOUNDRY CAMS and Chat with Shanelle LIVE...and nekkid (her, not you...genius)
Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?
We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did
FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing
Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates
be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep
We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.
We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.
We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.
FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.
It's the weeekend, and it's time for you to find a lonely wife... she's yours for the taking:
This lonely hot wife was brought to you by the people who encourage affairs with lonely hot wives.
...and when your wife told you she was going out with the girls:
She was at a bachelorette party getting nailed by The Dancing Bear!
THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Kind of like your people skills. Way to interact with humanity!)
We're assuming that if there's a WRONG way to load a Jet Ski into a van...
THIS would be it. Gonna need a new Jet Ski... Might we suggest one of THESE?
THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:
Holly Madison is all Kinds of Fun (WWTDD)
aaaand of course, Holly Madison is all kinds of NAKED
Naomi Campbell's Ass Is Holding Up Well (Drunken Stepfather)
Gia Lashay is kind of exotic looking, wouldn't ya say? (Freakshow Planet)
The A-Team - Movie Review (Bullz-Eye)
11 Sad Keanu Photoshops (URLesque)
The 20 Hottest Same-Sex Kisses (Heavysssss)
Jenni Lee is in a lace-up corset and fishnets and ...*drool* (Dailyniner)
New live-action and animatronic version of The Wind in the Willows (FilmDrunk)
Cody Love doesn't like being nude...she LOVES it! (z0d)
Virtual Dating Assistant Explains the Science of Online Hook-Ups (Asylum)
9 Best Fictional Wives In TV History (EGOtv)
Oh, the Places You'll Actually Go! (CollegeHumor)
I'M SORRY:
(Sorry that your complete lack of personality will prevent you from having any meaningful relationships)
The old British farts in IRON MAIDEN kicked off their world tour in Dallas:
Remarkably, everyone escaped without needing a hip replacement See IRON MAIDEN on tour now before they all wither and die.
Tommy Lee and METHODS OF MAYHEM have a new song called "Fight Song":
...and it's *gulp*...not that bad.
From Rock, we move to Racks
OK, so get this: Nikki Benz is getting an exam from her doctor, who just happens to be Nikki Sexx. You're going to have to suspend disbelief for a few minutes:
Of course, that's just the preliminary exam the full exam is a lot more thorough and requires a lucky boy to help
Naturally-busty Ms. April O'Neil is just waking up from a nap and needs to roll around naked for a little bit.
Those are the luckiest sheets in the world.
Holy Smokes! Another beautiful webcam model shaking her ass! Whodathunkit?
Ember Reigns, the buxom blond bombshell who you have seen in numerous FOUNDRY CAMS videos, as well as at her own site, has given us what could be her finest performance yet:
Honestly... do you REALLY need us to tell you to click on Ember's pic? JUST DO IT!
Great song. Great hiney. When you stop hallucinating, Go check out Ember's Sexy Self LIVE - online NOW
Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?
We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did
FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing
Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates
be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep
We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.
We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.
We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.
FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.
THAT's TERRIBLE:No money for dental insurance? No Problem!
Just get a big-ass brick, a piece of string, and hold yer breath...THAT's NOT-SO TERRIBLE:(but if you keep making that pouty face, it's going to stay that way)
Ginger Spice Got Old, didn't she? (Drunken Stepfather)...we prefer to remember the Ginger Spice...aka Geri Halliwell who used to make big boob topless videos
Ireland Baldwin has gotten her revenge...mwahahahaha! (WWTDD)...and since we're total filthbags, let's all stare lovingly at nude pictures of her mother, Kim Basinger.Blast From the Past Model: Meriah Nelson (Bullz-Eye)Brandi Bryant Breaks out her Boobs and Booty (FreakshowPlanet)Top Ten Bear Stories You Need to Know About (Gunaxin)Colleen Connolly Can't Keep her Clothes On (z0d)Ten signs your friend is a terrible wingman (The Campus Throne)Irena and her heavy natural boobs hanging out on the Dock6 Great Songs Written About Drugs (Afro Jacks)T-Shirt War! (daveandthomas)5 Valentine's Day Cards Inspired by the Jersey Shore (CollegeHumor)Animated Dinasaur Sex? Yes Please (Warming Glow)10 Rejected Wii Accessories (Comedy)10 Things You Didn't know about the Brat Pack (MovieFone)I'M SORRY:(Sorry that have successfully managed to alienate everyone who has ever tried to help you. Well done, fella!)Our buddy our friend JOHN MAYER made a tearful apology during his Nashville comment last night:
He's sorry for all those things he said in PLAYBOY recently.Outspoken conservative and all-around badass TED NUGENT banged out the National Anthem in Texas:
No animals were bow-hunted during the making of this video.Those dandy fellas in BULLET FOR MY VALENTINE are releasing a new CD in the Spring:
This is the new single "Your Betrayal", and it goes out to radio on March 8.From bands to breasticles, here's Hungarian hotness Dorothy Green:
Her bikini fell off. No it didn't. She took it off. Seriously. She meant to.This amazingly fit babe is PLAYBOY's Jessica DeCarlo:
She has NO problem walking around bare-assed, letting guys take photos of it....and we have NO problem with thatWHo IS this large-breasted European blond? Why, it's none other than Katerina, that's who!
She's having a very hard time keeping her boulders in that boulder-holder...and that's just the start of this dirty girl's funOur FOUNDRY CAMS girl Brooke made us a finger-licking video. Rob Balducci sent us his new track "Choke". Together, they look like this:
Click on Brooke's Body, crack a beverage, and forget whatever you had planned for the day. she'll be online when you get done mopping up.
Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?
FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing
Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates
be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep
We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.
We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.
We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.
FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.
