New TWITTER, MILF washing a Ferrari, Winger Winging it, BRUCE LEE auditioning, New ANVIL, Old NIGHT RANGER, New THIN LIZZY line-up, Lisa Ann, Julia Ann, Mary Carey...Ann

Remember, kids... you follow us and we'll follow you!
You follow US on twitter and we follow YOU on twitter. Simple enough, right?
- Follow this one and we'll keep you up to date on all the cockfights we have going on in the basement
- Now Follow this one (we'll keep you up to date on what all the girlies are doing)

Why is your mom washing your dad's Ferrari with steel wool pads? Dad must have done something none-too-pleasing

and how do we know it's your mom? She posted the pic online in a personal ad... Dad's not getting the job done at home, evidently.

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Just like the way you pretend your hair isn't falling out in clumps on an hourly basis)

When is WINGER going to change the name of "Seventeen" to "Thirty-eight"... you know, considering the age factor of the fans:

*rimshot*... fine, it wasn't one of our best.

That clip was actually shot in 2007...just to show you how timely we are... Boooooooooo.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:

(Unlike your hairline, which would look better if you combed your eyebrows up over your head)

Who wants to see Bruce Lee's original audition for the role of Kato on 'The Green Hornet'? We're gonna show you anyway:

Pay special attention to the Kung Fu demonstration with the old man (about halfway through)

Oooh - look what's coming to video soon! This wasn't half bad, actually.

Jennifer Lopez has a bit of a sloppy stomach:

Why she's showing it off, we don't know

Neveah and Raina Lee touching tongues. Yay. (FreakShow Planet)

2011 Suzuki Kizashi Review (Bullz-Eye)

Dating Tips from the Funniest Women on Twitter (How About We)

I'm Ashamed to be a Boston Sports Fan (MadeMan)

Chikita...she's one hot banana...and by 'banana' we mean 'large-breasted blond babe' (z0d)

Victoria Rae Black may be pasty, but she's way purty (Daily Niner)

I'M SORRY:
(Sorry you're going to muddle through life with the same mediocrity you attack every other task with)

Did you NOT hear the latest ANVIL song? Well, here ya go:

"Juggernaut of Justice"...nothing like subtlety. Love it! We're sure it'll sell tens of copies.

OK, maybe a hundred copies. C'mon, look at that cover art.

How many original members of a band do you need to keep using the name? If you're THIN LIZZY, the answer is ONE. Maybe two:

When one of your guitarists has to leave to re-join DEF LEPPARD, you're bordering on silly...

DULUXE EDITION?!?! Well, then I should rush out and buy this bugger right now.

Hey Mexico! We're NIGHT RANGER! Here's a song you may not have heard a hundred thousand times in the past 26 years:

See, that was what we call sarcasm. Anyone who hasn't heard "Sister Christian" has probably been living on Jupiter... or at least Mars... for a while.

...and this is the last album the band released. Umm, no one is buying music these days, if you haven't already figured that out.

How much for ze little girlz, eh?

We've got a double-banger of our favorite MILF, Lisa Ann for you... banger...bang-her... get it? *rimshot*
Lisa Ann is seducing a very lucky grocery boy in this clip.

VERY lucky. SUPER lucky. EXTRA-SPECIAL super-lucky, with sugar on top...and on the sides.

...and here's the lovely Lisa Ann in leopard-print lingerie.

OK, enough alliteration for one stupid entry. Alright already.

OK, folks...show of hands: who wants to see blond MILF Julia Ann roll around half-naked on a pool table?

Yeah, that's what we thought. All of you. whatcha waitin' for then?

Our braniac friend Mary Carey loves taking her clothes off outside. How do we know?

Because every damn clip she sends us features her... taking her clothes off outside. THAT's how we know

Facelifts are let's face it, necessary...and FOUNDRY CAMS was no exception to that rule, so we did this:

We totally revamped FOUNDRY CAMS, with a new domain, hotter girls, lower prices, and a better user experience. So far, the response has beeen HUGE. Check it out:


and if you feel like following us on Twitter (we'll keep you up to date on what all the girlies are doing)

Click it, fool!

Speaking of FOUNDRY CAMS check out what WE got from GISELE:
The lovely blonde Gisele, who you have seen in dozens of FOUNDRY CAMS videos, is back at it once again with a hosed-down FoundryMusic T-shirt, high heels, and very little else on. She's shaking her perfectly-formed hiney to FOUNDRY's "Ain't Like You" from the RETOOLED album, mixed by Rich DeCicco and featuring our buddy Rob Balducci on guitar. Thanks as always to Jon for the editing.

Buy FOUNDRY: Retooled now at Amazon:



Watch Video. Click Photo. Enjoy Gisele. Simple, right? (you'd be shocked how many people fuck that up)

...and that, friends... is the way to make salsa in woodchipper.

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Beach MILF, Dee Snider Forgets Lyrics, ALTER BRIDGE, HINDER and PRETTY MAIDS live and on FOUNDRY CAMS, Rachel Starr and Carmella Bing despise tight clothing

You see this? this is the body of a lonely married lady hanging out at beach getting hit on by a guy that SHOULD be you.

Her husband is back home nailing his secretary so it's your turn to make a move on this fine piece of mommy muff

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Just like the amount of space your girthy ass takes up when you sit down. Here's a treadmill. Happy birthday.)

Either Dee Snider has way too much on his plate or he's got Alzheimer's...because the TWISTED SISTER frontman is starting to forget the words, maaaaan.

"You can't stop Rock and ---" aww, crap. Forgot the words.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:


WOW! Who knew SHE had boobs like these? (Drunken Stepfather)

Apparently everyone EXCEPT us knew she liked getting naked on film... You'll still never guess.

Featured Model: Jacqueline Suzanne (Bullz-Eye)

Got pregnant? Got Fat? You Gotta Get this book! (Muscle Sorority)

Oh Peach, you're jut as sweet as a ... oh you get the idea (FreakShow Planet)

Isis Taylor is in a tight pink bikini...anyone wanna guess for how long? (z0d)

Kayden Kross is about to do something very naughty with a very LUCKY candy cane (Dailyniner)


I'M SORRY:
(Sorry to hear that your hefty carcass keeps breaking the lawn furniture every time you sit down.)

CREED minus Scott Stapp equals ALTER BRIDGE and EVERY TIME I DIE?

The singer is Myles Kennedy, who just happens to be singing in SLASH's solo band and... so he's kind of, well, you know... talented.

Our friends in HINDER have have a new album out TODAY called All American Nightmare, and this is them playing the title track in York, PA:

No. Nobody slipped on a banana peel or caught on fire. It's just a good tune, that's all. OK, you go now.

OOh! Almost forgot! Speaking of HINDER, they gave us music for:
this Foundry Cams video:

and
THIS FOUNDRY CAMS video with the twins

Speaking of bands that have given us songs for FOUNDRY CAMS videos, check out Danish rock band PRETTY MAIDS doing what they do best... in Denmark, of course:

Those guys gave us music for Breanna's FOUNDRY CAMS video.

And now we yank the steering wheel to the left all the way toward...the boobies! Yaaaaay Boobies! (yeah, I know. We're a bunch of children)

Oh...Sweet...God... RACHEL STARR cloned herself!

Oh wait, sorry. That's a mirror. We know because we saw the full-length scene in CURVY GIRLS 5 (click to watch it on Demand). We like to do our homework.

You've seen her before, but might not know tha this is Carmella Bing and she's got on a very very tight dress:

She gives you a little sample here, but The full madness is in CURVY GIRLS 4 ... and yes, once we get into a series, we beat it to death.

Our busty blond pal Gisele, who you have seen in countless FOUNDRY CAMS videos as well as her own site GOT GISELE, has returned to help us promote Retooled, the new FOUNDRY EP, available at all major online outlets. In the clip, Gisele makes some creative use out of a long shiny black light, while shaking her semi-clothed body to FOUNDRY's "Black Lights, Bright City" (Retooled by Rich DeCicco).
Thanks to Rich for the great remake. Thanks to Jon for the amazing editing, and thanks to Gisele for the rockin' bod.



Click on Gisele's impressive rack, then rock out with some FOUNDRY.
When your jaw stops swinging open, Go visit her at Got Gisele
...you can also Chat with Gisele LIVE on her cam

...and that, kids... is how we wrap up today's big-ass-salad of funs....

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Gaga does METALLICA, Bull Busts Through Fence, Big Booty Sister, GUNS N ROSES Private Show, QUEENSRYCHE still going, Jillian Beyor, Chavon Taylor, and Busty Brits show off their... you know.

Weekends are for laying around and tossing Fritos into a busty married woman's cleavage:

look, if her man isn't giving her what she needs the YOU have to. It's a law. at least we THINK it is.

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(but not as awful as the situation you're stuck in, buddy boy)

None other than Lady GaGa was dancing to Metallica at Lollapalooza this year in Chicago:

Somewhere, in the dark corner of a room, James Hetfield is weeping quietly.

Several Spaniards learned a fast lesson in 'You Fuck with the bull, you get the horns'

That is one seriously pissed off bull. Do you know how pissed off you have to be to smash through a wooden fence? Well, WE do.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:



Which Big-Booty Bleached Blonde has an identical ass-tastic sister? (Drunken Stepfather)

Bestu Futurama Characters To Party With (Gunaxin)

Briana Blair has NO hair...down there. You know what we mean (Freakshow Planet)

2010 Fall TV Preview (Bullz-Eye)

Ally Ryan is all kinds of sexy, and we were going to say something witty, but man, did WE run out of steam FAST (z0d)

A Long, Painful Week Following Jessica Simpson On Twitter (EgoTV)

Megan Curry...hey, we used to know a.. oh, nevermind. *Breathe in... Breathe out...* (Dailyniner)

Your Freshman guide to picking the best Frat (The Campus Socialite)

I'M SORRY:
(Sorry that you now take orders from a kid younger than you. Bwahaha-haha)

whoa, wait a minute, GUNS N' ROSES did a private showcase in Paris?

No one threw bottles? No one threw a tantrum? We don't believe it!.

Those nice boys in QUEENSRYCHE are still on tour (click for tickets, monkey!) and after 20 years "The Thin Line Still holds up":

20 years?? has it been THAT long since EMPIRE was released? Damn. We feel OLD. Holy Crap! It WAS 20 years ago... check out Queensrÿche's discography!

and from classic rock, we segue into...classic racks! (of course)

Busy British Bombshells Jenny Badeau and Emily Cartwright have NOTHING better to do than feel each other upon a boring afternoon:

We don't blame them. We do the same thing when we're bored... only with the neighbor's cat.

PLAYBOY hotness Jillian Beyor is a bit of a ditz. We couldn't care less though:

Why? Because Jillian's a hottie. a hottie who happens to love rough make-up sex... she's OUR kind of Gal!

Natuallly-busty Chavon Taylor is oiling up her enormous boobs. Why? Because it's called 'foreplay' you noob:

You can see Chavon's full-length hardcore scene in Big Wet Tits 4... and see just how sloppy one gal can get!

Camerella is a naturally-busty, young, perky, beautiful young lady who has no problem taking her clothes off on her cam. She's also the kind of good sport who has no problem chopping up one of our old-school, over-sized Foundrymusic T-Shirts and turning it into a two-piece outfit. Thanks to Josh, Keith, and our friends in BUCKCHERRY for the song "All Night Long".



Click on Camerella's strategically-placed hand, watch the full-length video, then spend all night long chit-chatting with Camerella online on her cam LIVE!

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Firecracker vs. Fish Tank, THOR video from Comic-Con, Tara Reid Drunken Party Pics, Dee Snider in Texas, Adler's Appetite LIVE, Old School Shauna Sand, Amy Reid is Oily

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(But not half as bad as your people skills)

A group of college-age MENSA members drop a firecracker into a ten gallon fish tank:

What did they THINK was going to happen. The Goldfish are OK. The Fish Tank isn't.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:

Ladies and Gentlemen, dorks of all ages (like us)... let your geek flag fly... it's Exclusive THOR footage!

If you were lucky enough to see it at Comic-Con, then ... Good for you. If not, then Enjoy... and if you don't know THOR, you have catching up to do.

Adriana Lima is Not a Good Bikini Model (WWTDD)

'Scuse us, ma'am Enough with the 'Ugly Betty' crap and drop yer pants!


Tara Reid Drunken Party Pictures (Drunken Stepfather)

Just the way we like her shitface drunk and falling out of her shirt... those acting gigs are right around the corner!
Would You Eat Sushi Out of a Tube? The Sushi Popper is Now Available! (The Campus Socialite)

Final Thoughts On Comic-Con: It’s Like A 4-Day Double Rainbow Video (FilmDrunk)

Monika Vesela shouldn't play soccer naked. She's going to get hurt. Are we missing the point? Again? (Freakshow Planet)

Grub For Guys: Peanut Butter and Banana Burger (Bullz-Eye)

Adorable Kittens Cause Massive Property Damage, Bodily Injury (UPROXX)

Ashley Nicole Arthur shouldn't play basketball naked. The other team might get distracted, you know? (Dailyniner)

The 10 Most Dangerous MMA Fighters (InfoGraphic) (The Cage Doctors)

The 100 Hottest Women from New Jersey (BroBible)

Cassie Kellar is one Student whose Body We'd like to Study (z0d)

Facebook Sex Interactive Adventure (FunnyCrave)

Between Two Ferns with Zach Galifianakis: Steve Carell (Dave and Thomas)


I'M SORRY:
(but not half as sorry as you're going to be when you realize you have no marketable skills)

Dee Snider from TWISTED SISTER jumped on stage with GRADY at the Republic of Texas Biker Rally:

"We're Not Gonna Take it"? What, the rising cost of Icy Hot? See, that's an old person joke. Albeit a bad one.

Former GUNS N' ROSES drummer Steven Adler and ADLER's APPETITE rolled out their new song "Alive" in Santa Ana:

Because he's such a nice fella, he's giving away the song with every purchase of his new book... for a limited time, of course.

From Classic Rock to Classic Racks...

Holy Jamoley! Shauna Sand, who you kmight know from a li'l sex tape... was once a PLAYBOY Playmate of the Month:

This clip was from a 1997 Playboy Video Centerfold video. WOW. 13 years and a lot of plastic surgery makes all the difference.

Remember German adult starlet Amy Reid? She's wetting up her boobs again:

She's doing it all in the name of her profession of course. you can see the full scene in Big Wet Tits 3 - On Demand Now (see? we no lie).

Holy. Moley. Our Italian a beautiful young lady from FOUNDRY CAMS girl Dannie Gee or Danni G did a great job tearing up and re-working our old-school FoundryMusic T-shirt, and shaking her ass to "Kick in The Teeth" by PAPA ROACH from their upcoming album Time For Annihilation..On the Road, and On The Record:


Pick yourself up off the floor, wipe the drool off your chest...and then Head on over to FOUNDRY CAMS and Chat with Danni Gee/Danni G LIVE...and NUUUUDE (uh, yeah...we mean HER. Not you)

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.