Mami Culo Bueno, New PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN trailer, J-WOWW is an author? Pissing off a cop, Old Farts gone Wild, TM Stevens and Ridiculous bass playing

Yo, homes...we're not saying your mom's got a nice butt...

but based on the those photos she's posting online... We sure as hell are THINKING it!

THAT's TERRIBLE:
( Listen up, monkeybrain - you're not getting any smarter so pay attention PLEASE)

peeling out in front of a cop...

is a GREAT way to get an express ticket to jail... so would you knock it off...please?

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:

(Unlike your hairline, and fuse...which both seem to be shrinking daily. Wow, are YOU a catch)

The new trailer for PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: On STRANGER TIDES doesn't make us miss Keira Knightley or Orlando Bloom one bit

You've got your Johnny Depp, Geoffrey Rush, Ian McShane, and your Keith Richards...who else do you need?

J-WOWW is a best selling author

Someone fucking shoot me. (Drunken Stepfather)

Eufrat has a name that youd associate with a big fat person... but she's anything BUT (FreakShow Planet)

The Top 5 Health & Fitness Myths (Bullz-Eye)

Nika and Sophia are REALLY REALLY friendly...and that is NEVER a bad thing. (z0d)

Keylee Parker andn her friend are having happy nake fun time! (Daily Niner)

I'M SORRY:
(Sorry your teeth are as black as your soul. Here's a few bucks. See a dentist, schmuck.)

If SKID ROW is still singing "Youth Gone Wild" after 20 years...

Wouldn't that make them "Old farts gone wild"? Just sayin'.

...and now for an out-of-control bass guitar solo, courtesy of TM STEVENS:

Fucker is GOOD, but come on, man...some people have jobs to go to in the morning.

Boobies? Booty? Did someone say the magic word? Ehh, maybe:

We totally revamped FOUNDRY CAMS, with a new domain, new girls, lower prices, and a better user experience. So far, the response has beeen HUGE. Check it out:


Click it, fool!

Speaking of FOUNDRY CAMS check out what the lovely CARMEN did for Us latley:
The lovely luscious Carmen, who you have seen in countless FOUNDRY CAMS videos, as well as at her own site CAM WITH CARMEN returns with this amazing video where you get to see her behind-the-scenes at one of her many photo shoots.

Thanks to ART OF DYING for giving us "Die Trying" and thanks as always to Jon for the editing.



Whatchoo waiting for, mang?!?! CLICK IT, FOKKER!

Who wants to see what Lexi Belle is up to lately? Looks like about ten sit-ups!!

Shake a tail-feather, honey Asses like that take WORK...Crunch! GRRRR! Crunch!!! GRRR!!.

and of course Jynx Maze needs NO help making her arse look fantastic

except for maybe that cameraman. Take a hike, dude..

...and that, friends... is the way to poop in the woods.

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

MILF Cyborg - Maybe, Gun-shy Robbers, ADLER's APPETITE in SPAIN, DEICIDE in Rochester, STONE SOUR on Kimmel, Candy Manson wrapped in Gold, Carmen wrapped in Very little

Joey's mom is in the kitchen with giant tubs of whey protein. Crap. Joey's mom is a Cyborg

Oh hell, there's a first time for everything. hooking up with a cyborg could be a lot of fun...regardless of whether it's your friend's mom.

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(So is your face. Stop breaking mirrors, assface)

Check out the world's most gun-shy robbers...

These geniuses held up a jewelry store in England. The shop owner had NO weaponry of any kind. He still chased them away... *cough* PUSSIES *cough*

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:

(unlike your contribution to society, waste of space)


Could someone tell Bam Margera that if he's going to cheat, maybe he shouldn't be taking PICTURES of it (Drunken Stepfather)



Anju... what a weird name. What a not-so-weird body (FreakShow Planet)

Ten Movies the 2011 Academy Award Nominees Don't Want You to See (Bullz-Eye)

Bobbi Billard has boobs you just want to go to bed on (z0d)

Sofia Webber will have you so so so so so so...what were we saying? Dayum. (Daily Niner)



I'M SORRY:
(Sorry that the only friend you have is that bottle of Jack you cozy up to every night.)

DEICIDE could be the hardest-to-understand band playing today:

Of course, that's a sweeping generalization based on one video of the low-end, gutteral howling done by the singer/bassist with the upside-down cross burned in his head. WOW, don't sound too judgemental now, sheesh..

ADLER's APPETITE continues to capitalize on the old GUNS N' ROSES catalog with gigs like this one in Spain:

Eh, if SLASH can do it, so can Steven Adler... and comparing Adler to Slash is realistic... yeah, sure..

...and we can't think of anything smarmy or sarcastic to say about STONE SOUR playing on JIMMY KIMMEL LIVE:

Only that if CORY TAYLOR gets the VELVET REVOLVER gig, that's THREE bands that sucker is going to be in, and we'll be counting down until his massive corinary.

From Guitars... we spin the wheel of awesome over to... you guessed it! Girls!

Candy Manson is packed into a gold leotard just about as tight as humanly possible... and that, folks is no small feat:

You ever wonder how a gal with 32DDD bosoms sleeps at night? Does she have to dig out a trench in her mattress? One can only wonder.

Once again, we must ogle the lovely...and busty...Carmen from Cam With Carmen...who you have seen in numerous FOUNDRY CAMS videos:

There's nothing like strategically-placed heart-shaped decals to make the imagination run wild, thankyouverymuch.

Speaking of FOUNDRY CAMS... let's lookee here...

If Emma Ink looks familiar, that's because she's been in other FOUNDRY CAMS clips before (these girls change their names like they're changing their panties, for crying out loud). She's tattooed up and would be the perfect trophy to add to the back of your motorcycle... if you're into that kind of thing. Thanks to our friends in FURNAZE for the friendly music.
Thanks to Jon for the editing, as always.

Watch the vid. Get all excited... then get yourself on over to Emma-Ink.com and watch Emma LIVE, on webcam, getting naked and dirty just for you. (and we do mean JUST for you, because she'll do the private VIP thing if you want)




...and that, friends... is how we say "Beat it, monkeybrain"

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Christmas leftovers, Ice Removal in Russia, NYC Bouncer Brawl, KIX-mas in Mississippi, OZZY Hawking Tea, GWAR plays XBOX, Nikki Benz, Dirty Lilly, and Carmen's Holiday Spectacular

All we got for Christmas was our two front teeth... and a bunch of barely-dressed college girls wearing antlers...

Their boyfriends were passed out at the bar so we moved in and took advantage. It's what we do.

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Just like the face you see in the mirror every morning, chubster)

Ice removal in Russia just got a little more interesting.

Shooting a Vintorez sniper rifle in the air in a crowded neighborhood. Yeah, that looks safe, doesn't it?

What say we pick a fight with a New York City bouncer?

Ooh, threaten to sue him... sure, that'll work. Adios, muchacho

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:


Ass in Jeans! Ass in Jeans! Who could it be? (Drunken Stepfather)

Hey-O! Take a guess! it's not like she signed a deal with Vivid to release a sex tape... oh wait, yes she did.

Kneely Morgan is kneeling naked by the fence... and what kind of name is 'Kneely'? (FreakShow Planet)

Bullz-Eye.com Girl Next Door: Mia Vincent (Bullz-Eye)

We hope you're not driving when you click on this photo of Heather Starlett, because it WILL distract you (z0d)

Sasha Cane touches her tiny pink taco (Dailyniner)



I'M SORRY:
(Sorry that you outgrew another wardrobe, piggy)

The guys in KIX are still kicking, apparently:

...and Steve Whiteman is still as difficult to understand as ever. Lead singer says what?!?!

OZZY OSBOURNE used to bite the heads off of bats. Now he's hawking Lipton iced tea:

Kinda takes away the "Prince Of Darkness" image, doesn't it?

Do enormous latex codpieces work with KINECT for the XBOX? They do if you're GWAR:

Hell, everything works if you're GWAR.

What would an update be without copious amounts of breast meat?

Busty blond adult starlet Nikki Benz can't wait to diddle:

and we don't blame her. If we had a body like that, we'd diddle ourselves incessantly. Just for kicks, Check out our interview with Nikki Benz

Christmas may have come and gone, but you can still enjoy the holiday spirit with Dirty Lilly:

She's 19 years old, she's from Poland, and she LOVES being nekkid. Oh dear lord, do boobs EVER get old? No. No they don't.

Carmen, who you have seen in countless other FOUNDRY CAMS videos and her own site Cam With Carmen, as well as Sweet Victoria, Lita, Lux, Eve, Jade, and Jaylee are giving the gift of scantily-clad awesomeness this holiday season.
Thanks to our buddy GARY HOEY for his version of "Carol Of The Bells" and thanks to Jon for the editing.
Merry Christmas everybody!


CLICK ON CARMEN's GIFT-WRAPPED TA-TA's and UNWRAP HER PRESENTS

After you're done drooling, why not see more of Carmen at CAM WITH CARMEN and check out her fully-unwrapped, fully-nude, fantastic rack...and everything else.

...and that, ladies and gents, is today's big ol' enchilada update....

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Drunken Street Fighting in Vegas, Bird vs Train, Kim Kardashian's Wax Sculpture, BUCKCHERRY's BP video, RUSH live in New Mexico, New PAPA ROACH video, Lupe Fuentes in the Shower, Carmen in a tiny outfit, Anastasia in a thong

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Just like your hairline. It's called ROGAINE. Go get some.)

What happens in Vegas...might just get your drunken, fighting ass locked up... in Vegas:

book a cheap flight to Vegas, gamble a little... and try not to get arrested.

What's the last thing that went through this bird's mind when he hit the train windshield?

HIS ASS!! Hey-O! *rimshot*.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:


Kim Kardashian Has the Worst Wax Sculpture Ever (WWTDD)

on the other hand, Kim Kardashian has a halfway-decent Sex Tape You know, the one in which she's getting ass-blasted by Ray J.


Which above-average pop star does this hiney belong to? (Drunken Stepfather)

What's Inside Cocoa Puffs (Asylum)

Rebecca Linares Wants to Show you her Privates...so ta-da! (Freakshow Planet)

Featured Model: Niki (Bullz-Eye)

Linda Blair's 'Exorcist' Character Without the Creepy Satan Voice (URLesque)

15 Inductees Into the Scrappy Athlete Hall of Fame (SportsPickle)

Heather Vandeven is a Soldier. See? She's Got a Hat! (and nothing else) (Dailyniner)

Want to get scared shitless again? Paranormal Activity Part Deux (The Campus Socialite)

Ariel's Nude body makes us re-think our dislike of redheads (z0d)

What to do About a Terrible Sunburn (FunnyCrave)

3D Display Lets you touch a Boob (GammaSquad)

Let’s Put It To Rest: Hotter With Or Without An Eating Disorder (EGOtv)


I'M SORRY:
(Sorry that the only ass you'll ever get is attached to a Peruvian pool boy)

RUSH is on tour now (click for tickets!) and they kicked off their tour in New Mexico the other day:

Do you understand that these guys are pushing SIXTY ...and they still play better than you do? Dayum.

Those generous boys in BUCKCHERRY have released a new song for the BP Oil spill titled "Our World":

you can download the full track at iTunes, and they'll donate the proceeds.

New label, new album, same band... it's PAPA ROACH and they have a new song called "A Kick in the Teeth":

And this is the video for it. Like it? No? Eh, phooey on you.

From Rock to Racks...that old gag

If you haven't seen Sexy Latina Lupe Fuentes, then you should take notice:

She's taking a shower and feeling herself up as she likes to do quite often...and we can't stop looking at her vids.

One of our favorite FOUNDRY CAMS girls...the lovely Carmen from Cam With Carmen has located the tiniest outfit EVER:

and it's just about one step above dental floss. It barely covers her. We can barely contain ourselves. She does WAAAY more here. Click it!

Holy hell. Czech beauty Anastasia Devine can't stop playing with her boobs:

...and if not for that pesky restraining oder, we'd be feeling them up too. Damn.

We have another beautiful busty blond babe shakin' her hiney in a FoundryMusic shirt...

Busty blond beautiful Bobbia makes her FOUNDRY CAMS debut in this clip featuring music by Sweden's CRASHDIET:


CLick Bobbia's Booty, damn you!!

Nice, right? Cam up with Bobbia at FOUNDRY CAMS and try to charm her out of her shorts

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Osprey Takes Out Tree, Megan Fox in a Bikini, Bret Michaels Drops 'Idol' Hint, New KORN video, Brand New Mary Carey, Bella Valentine

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Sort of like your breath, your bald spot, your attitude, you face...shall we continue?)

The V22 Osprey is great for inserting troops into rocky terrain...

...and getting rid of pesky trees in your backyard.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:


Megan Fox. In A Bikini (WWTDD)

and where would we be without... Megan Fox...WITHOUT a bikini!


Jaimie Hilfiger (um, who?) is wearing a bikini (Drunken Stepfather)

Sexy Celebrities And Their Ugly Significant Others: A Field Guide (UPROXX)

Anette Dawn will have you bug-eyed from dusk till ... well... you know (Freakshow Planet)

A chat with Steve Austin (Bullz-Eye)

Sarah Pipkin is having a Picnic... Oh wait, she just took off her shirt and threw it over a haystack (Dailyniner)

Top 20 Awesome Fictional Cars (Gunaxin)

How to Build your own Superhero (FunnyCrave)

Syren Sexton looks like she enjoys sex...a ton... umm, get it? (z0d)

KORN answers YOUR Questions (The Bachelor Guy)


I'M SORRY:
(Sorry you forgot to wear a rubber and knocked up some skank you met online)

Our buddy our pal BRET MICHAELS dropped a none-too-subtle hint about being a new judge on American Idol:

This was in front of 1800 people at the Hard Rock Casino in Biloxi, MS. now fill your iPod with Bret Michaels...the man has medical bills, dammit!

Our pals in KORN are on tour now (Click for Tickets) and they just released a new video:

"Oildale (Leave Me Alone)" comes off the band's new disc Korn III: Remember who you Are... coming out July 13.

From rock gods to great bods...

Our busty buddy Mary Carey has a brand new site and sent us some clips to help promote it:

Blatant plug-whoring? Sure... But it's Mary Carey and she's totally hardcore so we're FINE with it

Beautiful blond babe Bella Valentine was born in Italy, raised in Poland, and resides in the U.S.:

Bella could be the most worldly piece of ass we've ever encountered.

What's this? More fantastic shamless self-promotion?? INDEED!

You know Carmen from her many FOUNDRY CAMS videos and from her solo site - CamWithCarmen. Here's a great clip of her "Unraveling" her clothes to some music by our friends in SEVENDUST:


CLICK THE PIC TO SEE CARMEN STRIP!

Then, when the feeling returns in your arms and legs... chat with Carmen LIVE, one-on-one!

You can also get hundreds of new photos and videos at Carmen's solo site - CamWithCarmen

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.