Your mom likes singles, Escalator Mishap, Britney Spears in V Magazine, CHIMAIRA's Charlie Sheen tribute, MOTORHEAD on Jimmy Fallon, SLASH in Australia

We don't want to alarm you, but we caught your mom at her night job the other evening:

We're responsible for at least ten of the singles she brought home in her butt and the stain she brought home on her shirt... we're gentlemanly when it comes to mothers.

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Just like this year's Academy Awards. What a snooze-fest. Oof)

All you need is Benny Hill music and this video would be PERFECT!

Going Down - Watch your step!

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:

(Unlike this year's Oscars... yes, we're going to beat that into the ground)


Britney Spears is on the cover of V Magazine (Drunken Stepfather)

and the "V" is for "Vapid"... see, cuz it's Britney Spears... and umm, you get it.


Raisa has a terrible name and a great body. This will set off a theme in today's update (FreakShow Planet)

11 Most Addictive Breakfast Cereals (Bullz Eye)

Chantelle Fontaine has a name like a tranny...she's suspect until we see a birth certificate (z0d)

Victoria Rae Black is pasty and white. She really should consider a name change to fit her pasty complexion (Daily Niner)



I'M SORRY:
(Sorry you stayed up to watch this year's Academy Awards... getting tired of that line yet?)

The whole world has Charlie Sheen fever and the guys in CHIMAIRA are no exception:

Presenting a death metal cover of The TROGGS "Wild Thing" in honor of Charlie Sheen's role in MAJOR LEAGUE.

Lemmy and MOTORHEAD were showing off their face bumps in New York City on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon

Singing "Get Back In Line"... and shaking like a leaf. Just watch Lemmy's right arm.

SLASH and Andrew Stockdale from WOLFMOTHER impressed the hell out of everyone in Brisbane:

OK, maybe not EVERYONE. A few people stayed home to drink oil cans of Foster's. And that's how you make a sweeping generalization.

Now, before you get too cultured, here's some BOOBS, and we don't mean your parents... ZING!:

Anyone else think Tommie Jo is a lousy name?

Us too. Booooo, Tommie Jo. Your name sucks.

Speaking of awful names, Cali Lakai probably got picked on a lot when she was a kid.

hence the need to take her clothes off for attention. Of course we're guessing. We have no concrete information.

Switching gears (kind of)... let's lookee here...

If Emma Ink looks familiar, that's because she's been in other FOUNDRY CAMS clips before (these girls change their names like they're changing their panties, for crying out loud). She's tattooed up and would be the perfect trophy to add to the back of your motorcycle... if you're into that kind of thing. Thanks to our friends in FURNAZE for the friendly music.
Thanks to Jon for the editing, as always.

Watch the vid. Get all excited... then get yourself on over to Emma-Ink.com and watch Emma LIVE, on webcam, getting naked and dirty just for you. (and we do mean JUST for you, because she'll do the private VIP thing if you want)




...and that, friends... is the way you don't pay attention to the Academy Awards... Had enough yet?

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

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FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

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We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

CRASHDIET singer gets his nuts drilled on stage, Acoustic Judas Priest, 5 Guitar Dimebag Tribute, GNR in UAE, Alexis Capri and her tattoos, Tori Black and Her Bikini, Sofia Saint and her closet

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Just like that huge thing you've been dragging behind you for the past several years... oh, that's your ass.)

Bat-head-biting is for pussies, maaan. Simon Cruz, singer for CRASHDIET gets his nuts drilled on stage, maaaaaaaan!

Of COURSE it's real... maybe he just heals fast, cuz that shit could really happen, right?

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:


Whose ass is this looking ridiculous? (Drunken Stepfather)

it's one that should continue making adult videos with creepy boyfriends... cuz that's what she's good at.

Win Every issue of PLAYBOY on an External Hard drive (The Smoking Jacket)

Nikki Nova has really nice nips... and a badass back tattoo (FreakShow Planet)

Girl Next Door: Mia Vincent Gallery (Bullz-Eye)

The Top 10 High-Performance Vehicles for Holiday Road Tripping (Sub5Zero)

Kathleen & Rachel are two VERY Friendly PLAYBOY girls (z0d)

Kate Hughes must have some very lucky neighbors, cuz see...she's getting naked by her windows. (Dailyniner)



I'M SORRY:
(Sorry you've conditioned yourself to believe you're still human. Whoopsie.)

You haven't experienced JUDAS PRIEST music...

Until you've experienced it LIVE, Acoustic, in a small pub in Akron, Ohio. ...Wait, what?

You know where you are?!?!?! You in the Middle East, baby!!! You gonna sweat.

That's AXL ROSE, and behind him is the current version of GUNS N' ROSES playing to 21,000 people in Abu Dhabi...

The DIMEBAG BEYOND FOREVER tour took place again this year with a glut of Finnish guitarists:

Are you Finnish? Naw, I'm just getting warmed up! *rimshot*

Of COURSE we have links to girlie clips. Why WOULDN'T we? Exactly.

This seductive young lady is Tori Black... and her bikini is way small

It doesn't stay on for long, though... she gets rid of it quick in the lates edition of "Lord Of Asses" ... Thank you, Tom Byron.

When adult starlet Capri Anderson isn't hanging out at Charlie Sheen's House...

She's showing off her boobs and tattoos on some horrific online destination, no doubt.

This is Sofia Saint Cleaning out her closet and she must have gotten quite a workout...

Because before long she's totally naked, so she must sweat easily.

Our busty blond pal Gisele, who you have seen in countless FOUNDRY CAMS videos as well as her own site GOT GISELE, has returned to help us promote Retooled, the new FOUNDRY EP, available at all major online outlets. In the clip, Gisele makes some creative use out of a long shiny black light, while shaking her semi-clothed body to FOUNDRY's "Black Lights, Bright City" (Retooled by Rich DeCicco).
Thanks to Rich for the great remake. Thanks to Jon for the amazing editing, and thanks to Gisele for the rockin' bod.



Click on Gisele's impressive rack, then rock out with some FOUNDRY.
When your jaw stops swinging open, Go visit her at Got Gisele
...you can also Chat with Gisele LIVE on her cam

...and that, kids... is how we wrap up today's big-ass-salad of funs....

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Little Shark vs Large Man, SODAHEAD Chugs Coke, Jennifer Aniston Topless Again, SLAUGHTER does DIO, New DISTURBED Video, Brianna Love and the Oily Hiney, PLAYBOY's Angel Carson is a Sexy Wife

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(You know, like the way you interact with...everyone?)

A Large man takes on a Small Shark about 50 miles West of Marco Island in Florida...

Guess who won this little tug-of-War.

And switching gears radically, we shift to the infamous SODAHEAD 13...chugging Coke

He had progeria. He died. We'll miss ya, Sodahead.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:


Jennifer Aniston is Going Topless. Again. (WWTDD)

and we have nothing shitty to say, because Jennifer Aniston is holding up well and looks great naked


Katie Perry is Naked In Her New Video (Drunken Stepfather)

Sandy Summers Looks Awesome in ANY Season (Freakshow Planet)

'The Book Of Eli' - DVD Review (Bullz-Eye)

Golden Girls Kick Butt in 'Golden Girls' Action Movie (URLesque)

Porn Stars' Ideas for Father's Day Presents (Asylum)

PLAYBOY's Angela Taylor Can't Keep her hands off herself. We don't blame her (Dailyniner)

Our Virals, Our Selves: The Dark Side of YouTube (UPROXX)

Ashleigh Elizabeth is the most Amazing All-Natural Top Heavy Gal we've seen all day (z0d)

When Congressmen Attack (Dave and Thomas)

What Your Cell Phone Says About You (FunnyCrave)

Want to learn how to mess up the first date so she never comes back? Then check THIS out (Campus Socialite)


I'M SORRY:
(Sorry that your complete lack of personality will prevent you from having any meaningful relationships)

The new single from DISTURBED (load up yer iPod, dum dum) is online in video form, and FULL of explosions:

And in case you didn't know, DISTURBED is going on tour this summer, so get your tickets and be a few of the Ten Thousand Fists (eh? Get the reference?)

Well hot damn...SLAUGHTER is still around (see? They're on iTunes):

They were just in Syracuse, New York...paying tribute to DIO with their version of "The Last In Line"

and from bands, we migrate over to the ol Boobies and Booty

See this Southern Belle? She's Angel Carson and she's one of PLAYBOY's Sexy Wives:

Angel has 34DDD boobs. That's One seriously lucky husband.

Ass-tastic, booty-rific Brianna Love is oiling up her hiney in preparation for a savage pounding:

and to see the attack on her hiney check out BIG WET ASSES 11 - On Demand Now!

Holy Smokes! Another beautiful webcam model shaking her ass! Whodathunkit?

Ember Reigns, the buxom blond bombshell who you have seen in numerous FOUNDRY CAMS videos, as well as at her own site, has given us what could be her finest performance yet:


Honestly... do you REALLY need us to tell you to click on Ember's pic? JUST DO IT!

Great song. Great hiney. When you stop hallucinating, Go check out Ember's Sexy Self LIVE - online NOW

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Kendra's video RULES, Police Offer Frees Dog, 50 Cent Looks Great, Jonah Hex Trailer 2, Bon Jovi at Giants Stadium, Bret Michaels On American Idol, Jorn Lande's DIO Tribute, Busty Ellen and Jamie Graham

Just in case you missed the big news...we're having a party over here because...

Kendra Exposed: The Kendra Wilkinson Sex Tape is AVAILABLE NOW...and it's the most AMAZING video ever... next to the Zapruder film.

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Sort of like your shitty sense of entitlement)

A Plattsburg, Missouri police officer rescued a trapped pooch from a fence a while back:


... and then the dog went and did something just... silly.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:

The second trailer for the big screen adaptation of JONAH HEX is online:


You got yer Josh Brolin, you got your Megan Fox... *drool*, oh and don't forget John Malkovich. Oh, and LOTS of shit blowing up.

50 CENT Looks Great! (WWTDD)


Sex & The See-Through Shirt... Guess who? (Drunken Stepfather)

OK, so we limited it to a potential FOUR women...but this one is by FAR the most do-able of the bunch...and we have seen her boobies on screen.

A Tribute to Silence of the Lambs’ Buffalo Bill (Gunaxin)

Shay Laren and Her Huge Hooters are Hanging out by the Pool (Freakshow Planet)

A Chat with Richard Roeper (Bullz-Eye)

PLAYBOY's Kathleen Edge is Getting Naked ...in the study... with a candlestick... get it? CLUE joke. (Dailyniner)

The 50 Hottest World Cup WAGs of All-Time (Bleacher Report)

Step Right Up And See The Twitter (UPROXX)

Stacy Silver Shows off The Luckiest Leather Undies EVER (z0d)

Worst Death Ever: Car Crash With Flatbed Truck Hauling 17 million Bees (GammaSquad)

The 12 most awesome cowboys in TV & film history (Guyism)

A Fear Of Hobos (FunnyCrave)


I'M SORRY:
(Sorry you forgot to skim the pool and change the kegs in a timely fashion. Maybe next time you won't have to sleep in the garage)

Our buds in BON JOVI are on the road (click to get your mitts on the best tix!) and they christened the new Meadowlands Stadium last night:

It was an intimate affair. In front of about 50,000 screaming fans. get your tickets, kids!.

Once again, our pal BRET MICHAELS (load up that iPod, damn you) defied his doctors once again and hit the stage on American Idol last night:

...Casey James looked like a happy boy, doesn't he? Woulda been happier if he WON...but her DIDN'T.

Norwegian Metal Crooner JORN LANDE (who has been in more bands than we can count) recorded a tribute to the late great Ronnie James Dio:

Jorn Lande and his fu manchu are uber-serious.

From Rock Gods to Hot Bods...

Breastacular Busty Ellen and her 34G Boobs went for a ride...with her top down:

Get it? Top Down? Topless? Naked? Eh?

Shapely PLAYBOY babe Jamie Graham is totally nude... in the shower:

As opposed to clothed? is there any other way to shower? Evidently not.

What's this? More fantastic shamless self-promotion?? INDEED!

You know Carmen from her many FOUNDRY CAMS videos and from her solo site - CamWithCarmen. Here's a great clip of her "Unraveling" her clothes to some music by our friends in SEVENDUST:


CLICK THE PIC TO SEE CARMEN STRIP!

Then, when the feeling returns in your arms and legs... chat with Carmen LIVE, one-on-one!

You can also get hundreds of new photos and videos at Carmen's solo site - CamWithCarmen

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Russian Street Racer Crash, Megan Fox Quits Transformers, Audrina Patridge Quits Clothing, Bret Michaels on Oprah, METALLICA's Tribute to DIO, AVENGED SEVENFOLD's 'Nightmare', Ivy Black's Ass Roll, Leanne Crow's Bikini Hot Tub Party

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Kind of like chili and beer farts, but only worse, because they're coming out of you)

Street racing in Hollywood movies looks like a lot of fun...

Street Racing in Russia gets you T-Boned and nearly paralyzed. Well done, comrade!

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:

Megan Fox Quit, and was not fired from, Transformers 3 (WWTDD)

and of course, Megan Fox likes to show her Boobs, and her ass, as much as she can, because girls like Megan Fox SHOULD.

Audrina Patridge Likes Bubble Gum and Posing Nude (Drunken Stepfather)

How do we know? because this orgy of evidence proves our point. Oh Audrina. Color us aroused.

Have a Nice Flight (AskMen)

The Future of Peeing (UPROXX)

Chikita is one amazingly-hot...well, Chikita. (Freakshow Planet)

Post-Apocalyptic Cinematic: 15 Films Where Humanity Isn't Doing So Hot (Bullz-Eye)

Breanne's Beautiful Body Busted Out of her dress. Poor Gal. (Dailyniner)

Robin Hood: Anatomy of a Clusterf*ck (FilmDrunk)

Jedi Junkies - The Full Feature Film (Dailymotion)

Katrin Kant Keep Her Klothes On. What a Katastrophe (z0d)

First Look: 2011 Infiniti QX (The Bachelor Guy)

15 Inductees Into the Fictional Athlete Hall of Fame (SportsPickle)

I'M SORRY:
(Sorry all the breath mints on the planet won't clear up that halitosis of yours)

Our buddy our pal BRET MICHAELS talked about his recovery on Oprah yesterday:

fill up yer iPod with BRET MICHALES music. The guy's got medical bills and kids to feed, dag nabbit.

Them guys in METALLICA paid tribute to the late Ronnie James Dio in Lisbon, Portugal:

METALLICA. Napster Bad. iTunes Good. Oof, how old is THAT line?

The new AVENGED SEVENFOLD single is online...with Lyrics (in case you're like us and need to follow along):

the song is available on iTunes...as well as every other AX7 song... so go download some and thrash around your office.

From heavy metal to really heavy hooters, here we go again...

Busty brunette pinup gal Leanne Crow is having a Bikini Hot Tub Party:

How do you have a bikini hot tub party with just ONE woman? when it's Leanne Crow, you're invited to jump in with her...because you can actually do that, you know... jump through the monitor into the hot tub. Go on. Try it.

Hiney-rific Ivy Black is showing off her "Ass Roll":

What the hell is an 'Ass Roll', you ask? we have no clue, but it ends with her getting naked and touching herself... which is a great place to end up, you know?

What's this? More fantastic shamless self-promotion?? INDEED!

You know Carmen from her many FOUNDRY CAMS videos and from her solo site - CamWithCarmen. Here's a great clip of her "Unraveling" her clothes to some music by our friends in SEVENDUST:

CLICK THE PIC TO SEE CARMEN STRIP! 

Then, when the feeling returns in your arms and legs... chat with Carmen LIVE, one-on-one!

You can also get hundreds of new photos and videos at Carmen's solo site - CamWithCarmen

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Posted via web from foundry's posterous