New TWITTER, MILF washing a Ferrari, Winger Winging it, BRUCE LEE auditioning, New ANVIL, Old NIGHT RANGER, New THIN LIZZY line-up, Lisa Ann, Julia Ann, Mary Carey...Ann

Remember, kids... you follow us and we'll follow you!
You follow US on twitter and we follow YOU on twitter. Simple enough, right?
- Follow this one and we'll keep you up to date on all the cockfights we have going on in the basement
- Now Follow this one (we'll keep you up to date on what all the girlies are doing)

Why is your mom washing your dad's Ferrari with steel wool pads? Dad must have done something none-too-pleasing

and how do we know it's your mom? She posted the pic online in a personal ad... Dad's not getting the job done at home, evidently.

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Just like the way you pretend your hair isn't falling out in clumps on an hourly basis)

When is WINGER going to change the name of "Seventeen" to "Thirty-eight"... you know, considering the age factor of the fans:

*rimshot*... fine, it wasn't one of our best.

That clip was actually shot in 2007...just to show you how timely we are... Boooooooooo.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:

(Unlike your hairline, which would look better if you combed your eyebrows up over your head)

Who wants to see Bruce Lee's original audition for the role of Kato on 'The Green Hornet'? We're gonna show you anyway:

Pay special attention to the Kung Fu demonstration with the old man (about halfway through)

Oooh - look what's coming to video soon! This wasn't half bad, actually.

Jennifer Lopez has a bit of a sloppy stomach:

Why she's showing it off, we don't know

Neveah and Raina Lee touching tongues. Yay. (FreakShow Planet)

2011 Suzuki Kizashi Review (Bullz-Eye)

Dating Tips from the Funniest Women on Twitter (How About We)

I'm Ashamed to be a Boston Sports Fan (MadeMan)

Chikita...she's one hot banana...and by 'banana' we mean 'large-breasted blond babe' (z0d)

Victoria Rae Black may be pasty, but she's way purty (Daily Niner)

I'M SORRY:
(Sorry you're going to muddle through life with the same mediocrity you attack every other task with)

Did you NOT hear the latest ANVIL song? Well, here ya go:

"Juggernaut of Justice"...nothing like subtlety. Love it! We're sure it'll sell tens of copies.

OK, maybe a hundred copies. C'mon, look at that cover art.

How many original members of a band do you need to keep using the name? If you're THIN LIZZY, the answer is ONE. Maybe two:

When one of your guitarists has to leave to re-join DEF LEPPARD, you're bordering on silly...

DULUXE EDITION?!?! Well, then I should rush out and buy this bugger right now.

Hey Mexico! We're NIGHT RANGER! Here's a song you may not have heard a hundred thousand times in the past 26 years:

See, that was what we call sarcasm. Anyone who hasn't heard "Sister Christian" has probably been living on Jupiter... or at least Mars... for a while.

...and this is the last album the band released. Umm, no one is buying music these days, if you haven't already figured that out.

How much for ze little girlz, eh?

We've got a double-banger of our favorite MILF, Lisa Ann for you... banger...bang-her... get it? *rimshot*
Lisa Ann is seducing a very lucky grocery boy in this clip.

VERY lucky. SUPER lucky. EXTRA-SPECIAL super-lucky, with sugar on top...and on the sides.

...and here's the lovely Lisa Ann in leopard-print lingerie.

OK, enough alliteration for one stupid entry. Alright already.

OK, folks...show of hands: who wants to see blond MILF Julia Ann roll around half-naked on a pool table?

Yeah, that's what we thought. All of you. whatcha waitin' for then?

Our braniac friend Mary Carey loves taking her clothes off outside. How do we know?

Because every damn clip she sends us features her... taking her clothes off outside. THAT's how we know

Facelifts are let's face it, necessary...and FOUNDRY CAMS was no exception to that rule, so we did this:

We totally revamped FOUNDRY CAMS, with a new domain, hotter girls, lower prices, and a better user experience. So far, the response has beeen HUGE. Check it out:


and if you feel like following us on Twitter (we'll keep you up to date on what all the girlies are doing)

Click it, fool!

Speaking of FOUNDRY CAMS check out what WE got from GISELE:
The lovely blonde Gisele, who you have seen in dozens of FOUNDRY CAMS videos, is back at it once again with a hosed-down FoundryMusic T-shirt, high heels, and very little else on. She's shaking her perfectly-formed hiney to FOUNDRY's "Ain't Like You" from the RETOOLED album, mixed by Rich DeCicco and featuring our buddy Rob Balducci on guitar. Thanks as always to Jon for the editing.

Buy FOUNDRY: Retooled now at Amazon:



Watch Video. Click Photo. Enjoy Gisele. Simple, right? (you'd be shocked how many people fuck that up)

...and that, friends... is the way to make salsa in woodchipper.

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Sexy Teacher, Clumsy Thief, Replacement Drummer in AVENGED SEVENFOLD, Replacement Guitarist in SEVENDUST, Replacement Everyone in THIN LIZZY, Drunken frontman in LYNCH MOB, Frisky Mary Carey, Pantsless Brandy Talore

All this news about Charlie Sheen's drugged-up debauchery has us feeling a little lonesome.

Thankfully, there are cities full of women looking to have uncommitted flings with total strangers

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Just like your hairline, height, and choice in clothing)

The world's clumsiest thief knocked over a lottery office in Brazil:

Now all the police have to do is find the guy wearing a raincoat and motorcycle helmet. That shouldn't bee too hard, should it?

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:

(but youre stench is pretty unbearable. Use deodorant much?)

Will Rihanna ever stop sexting? (Drunken Stepfather)

Monicca spells her name strange, but looks anything but stunning (FreakShow Planet)

2011 Bullz-Eye Car Review: 2011 Dodge Durango (Bullz-Eye)

Ivana watch Ivana get naked in the Grass (Dailyniner)

AAilya Love - strange spelling. Excellent hiney (z0d)



I'M SORRY:
(Sorry that the younger guys keep getting promoted over you)

AVENGED SEVENFOLD brought out (what will probably be) their new drummer in PA:

That's a hell of a gig if you can get it. Just ask Mike Portnoy.

SEVENDUST could be the most underrated, under-funded band to ever play in front of thousands of people:

This this them in Iowa, minus Clint Lowery, who is hanging with his new kid.

How many original members are remaining in THIN LIZZY?:

Eh, not many. One, maybe? Can you even call the band THIN LIZZY at this point.

George Lynch and the rest of LYNCH MOB covered for a very drunk (or so it would seem) Oni Logan in Denver:

Ladies and Gentlemen, it's the world's first 90 proof singer!

From hard rock, we gently segue into hard nipples (no, not because of the frigid weather, either)

Our pal Mary Carey doesn't need much of a reason to get naked:

She gets horny outside... around pink flowers... in the kitchen... in the living room... in the bathroom... in the pool... in the garage... etc, etc, and so forth

Massively busty Brandy Talore is getting a special delivery:

...and by 'special', we mean the kind of delivery that requires a young lady to answer the door in her underwear. How come this never happens when we answer the door in OUR underwear? Hmmm?



...and that, as they say, is the way the cookie crumbles... Now go have a good cry and drink yourself unconscious

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Tuesday Links: Turkish Car vs. Tree, Bad Bulgarian Driver, MEGADETH surprise at NAMM, SLIPKNOT, SLAYER do KISS at NAMM, Rachel Aldana, Audrey Bitoni,

Happy Tuesday, boys and girls! Are you ready for some F U N?

Eh, go somewhere else. Meet a married friend to have some fun with.



See? It's all in good fun. Have an affair, whydontcha?

THAT's TERRIBLE:

A Turkish driver loses control and hits a very obvious...tree.




Kind of hard to miss... you know, being a tree and all.

As long as we're talking bad drivers... here's one from Bulgaria:




His license plate says 'WTF'...how appropriate.

THAT's NOT-SO TERRIBLE:

(but your sour puss is. How's about removing it with a kitchen knife?)





NBC is run by retards (WWTDD)





Saaay, whose cleavage is this?(Drunken Stepfather)



Here's a hint: She's had a lot of work done and she's made a homemade sex tape.



Heather Carolin makes us re-think our dislike of redheads (z0d)



Kagney Linn Karter. Long-ass name. Short-as-hell dress. NOICE. (Daily Niner)



Five Great Veridian Dynamics Commercials (Dave and Thomas)



Smokin' Hot Sandee Westgate has an Amazing Smile...and set of boobs (FreakshowPlanet)



Top 99 Most Desirable Women of 2010 (Ask Men)



Movie Review: Pandorum (Gunaxin)



The Daily Conan (Warming Glow)



5 Things We Hate About Megan Fox (FunnyCrave)



The 20 Worst Parenting Fails (Heavy)

I'M SORRY:

(Sorry that you think your grudge-holding skills could win you a Nobel Prize. If the Swedes gave those out, that is.)

Busty British brunette Rachel Aldana busts out of her black blouse:



It's kind of constricting... and her Double-J cups need to breathe.

Sexy young brunette Audrey Bitoni is getting naked...fast:



She winds up getting very cozy with a very lucky vibrator...after the jump, of course.

Three of the four guys in MEGADETH performed at NAMM:



'Twas a surprise midnight performance at NAMM Jam. Where's Chris Broderick? Eh, we dunno.

Keeping with the NAMM thing, here's Corey Taylor from SLIPKNOT and a few other guys on stage doing "Deuce":



You know, the one by KISS? Yeah, that one.

aaand back to the sexy with Sweet Krissy, who has apparently joined the Army:



She's wearing khakis after all... buuuut she's not wearing them for long...*droool*.

Blond, BISEXUAL Lizzy from FOUNDRY CAMS has a lot of tattoos. That's an understatement. Thanks to our buds in SwampDaWamp for giving us the song "Lady".






CLICK ON THOSE TATTOOED TA-TA's!

Chill a bit and think about seducing the lonely cougar down the road, and review the fun stuff in the MEDIA SECTION, including:



SLAYER and SLIPKNOT members perform 'Deuce' LIVE at NAMM Jam

CCTV: Turkish Driver Loses Control and Hits Tree

Rachel Aldana Busts Out Of Her Black Blouse

Caught on Video: Drunk Driver in Bulgaria slams into Car

Audrey Bitoni Living Room Striptease

MEGADETH: 'Symphony Of Destruction' LIVE at NAMM

Sweet Krissy the Sexy Army Girl

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?


FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing



Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates



be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep



We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.



We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.



We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.



FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Monday Links: MLK Day Madness, Exploding Wine Box, Night Ranger and All Star NAMM Jam, Golden Globes Hilarity, Carmella Bing and Sasha Cane

It's MLK Day and we're doing exactly what the good doctor would have wanted. We think.

It's Just what you were waiting for Bam Margera and Gina Lynn. Together. At. Last.



Get 'FantASStic Whores 4' now...classy, right?

Read up on all of our ass-tastic reviews - online in the SHOP section. We'll be adding up more every day!



THAT's TERRIBLE:

A box of wine is a fancy beverage for fancy people. What happens when you put one in a cheap Microwave oven?




Don't buy a Microwave and DON'T blow shit up in it. That's just silly.

THAT's NOT-SO TERRIBLE:

(but your sour puss is. How's about removing it with a kitchen knife?)





Which award-winning actress hit the Golden Globes looking like Bigfoot in a dress? (WWTDD)




Mischa Barton has a new gig
(Drunken Stepfather)



who wants to see Mischa Barton's ta-ta's?!?! *raises hand*



Bryleigh Rayne is trying to play shy. It's not working (z0d)





Girl Next Door: Cristy Mendevil (Bullz-Eye)



Georgia and Jana are touching tongues...and that's not all! (Daily Niner)



The Women of 24...All of them (FunnyCrave)



Veronica Saint...is no saint. We just thought of that. (FreakshowPlanet)



Hoops for Haiti Raises over $1 Million for Charity (Buster Sports)



Umbrellas, Tyson, and Blue People: The 2010 Golden Globe (Yep Yep)



Mariah Carey's Cleavage would not be denied (Don Chavez)



The 10 Dumbest Things Billy Bush Said Last Night at the Golden Globes (FilmDrunk)



15 Rock Stars that Went Off the Deep End (Fork Party)

I'M SORRY:

(Sorry that you think your grudge-holding skills could win you a Nobel Prize. If the Swedes gave those out, that is.)

Busty brunette adul starlet Carmella Bing is showing off her Double-D Cups:



Being topless makes knob-gobbling so much easier.

Sexy, sultry, surgically-augmented Sasha Cane rides the stripper pole in he VIP room:



There's a lot more going on after the jump...drool bib, time.

When you close your eyes, do you dream about NIGHT RNAGER?



We thought you might. That's why we posted this clip from this weekend's jam at NAMM.

Speaking of NAMM, here's Don Dokken, Carmine Appice, Paul Gilbert, Doug Aldrich, and Uli Jon Roth doing the CREAM classic "Sunshine Of Your Love":



You should be Rockin' with Dokken. Everyone else is. Seriously.

Blond, BISEXUAL Lizzy from FOUNDRY CAMS has a lot of tattoos. That's an understatement. Thanks to our buds in SwampDaWamp for giving us the song "Lady".






CLICK ON THOSE TATTOOED TA-TA's!

Take a break from hitting on the lonely MILF next door, and recap what we added to the MEDIA SECTION, including:



Exploding Box Of Wine in a Microwave

NIGHT RANGER: "When You Close Your Eyes" Acoustic LIVE at NAMM

Sasha Cane Rides the Stripper Pole

All Star Namm Jam - 'Sunshine Of Your Love' - LIVE at NAMM

Carmella Bing Busts out her DD Cups

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?


FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing



Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates



be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep



We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.



We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.



We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.



FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

FOUNDRY CAMS: Lizzy the Tattooed Lady

Our FOUNDRY CAMS girl Lizzy is blond, BISEXUAL, and has a LOT of tattoos. That last part could be the understatement of the year, incidentally. She's not afraid to show them off, either. She's also got some strategically-placed piercings, which makes us things she's a bit of a wild one. Thanks to our buddies in SwampDaWamp for the song "Lady".

Thanks to our own Jon for the editing.

FOUNDRY CAMS: Lizzy the Tattooed Lady
Uploaded by foundrymusic. - Get intimate with more sexy videos.

CLICK ON THOSE TATTOOED TA-TA's!



When you're up off the floor, head over to FOUNDRY CAMS and chat with Lizzy LIVE on webcam!


Bands and labels, if you want YOUR music featued in a FOUNDRY CAMS video, you should send your CDs and press kits to:



FoundryMusic

c/o DFL MEDIA, LLC

PO Box 257

Millington, NJ

07946





Get Some SwampDaWamp online now at Amazon:






OR... download SwampDaWamp now at iTunes






Links:

MySpace: SwampDaWamp

SwampDaWamp Official Website