Man Ruins Car Hood, PRIEST Trailer, Scarlett Johansson posing for MANGO, EXODUS and the Toxic Waltz, LYNCH MOB does DOKKEN, Mary Carey, Angie Savage, and Jenni Lee all do Naked

It's one of a handful of warm days, so why not head to the beach and pick up a sexy, lost, lonesome, MILF, bring her back to your place, and make her some iced tea:

and by 'Make her some iced tea' we mean get her liquored up and toss her around a motel room for a while. Her kids will find their way home... hopefully. Worry about YOU.

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(but not as bad as the news you're about to get, fella)

A man steps off a city bus with his head firmly planted up his ass...

...and ruins the paint job on a fancy sports car convertible. Nice going, mister.

Does Paul Bettany LOVE playing angst-ridden religious characters? (Davinci Code, Legion)

Here comes another one in PRIEST.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:



Scarlett Johansson posing for MANGO (Drunken Stepfather)

But what you really want to see is... Scarlett Johansson's Boobs and Butt Shaking around on film... Damn you, Ryan Reynolds!

Best Birthday Cake EVER (Dave and Thomas)

Amber Jay has a badass back tattoo, but you can't see it until she pops lifts up her lingerie (Freakshow Planet)

The Office: Season 6 - Review (Bullz-Eye)

Blake Rose really likes being naked and playing with her pink taco (z0d)

10 Steps To Dominating The Marriage Killer Known As Fantasy Football (UPROXX)

Ash Hollywood Fellates the luckiest banana EVER (Dailyniner)

House Guests: What Would George Clooney Do? (Ask Men)

Teri Hatcher's Swimsuit Snapshots (Too Fab)

2010 SpoCom Hawaii - Booth Babes, Promo Models, Go-Go Dancers & Girls Galore (Sub5Zero)

I'M SORRY:
(Sorry that you got passed over for that promotion...again)

The next time you're at a wedding, ask Grandma if she wants to do the 'Toxic Waltz':

Then throw on the EXODUS song. She'll shit her adult diapers.

OK, so George Lynch, who used to be in DOKKEN, and is now touring clubs with LYNCH MOB is playing DOKKEN covers:

It's the whole "playing clubs" thing we can't get over. Maybe it's time to take up bricklaying.

Saaay, who's that hanging outside the welfare office? Oh wait, that's not the welfare office. It's the free clinic.

Our favorite ditzy blond Mary Carey gets all horny when she rides her porch swing:

So of COURSE she has to pull out the biggest rubber dildo she can find. Why judge? We do the same thing.

Speaking of ditzy blondes, busty blond Angie Savage has a sequined skin-tight dress on (definition of 'class', incidentally):

She pulls that sucker out and cozies up to a very lonely vibrator. YES, vibrators get lonely. Sheesh. Where have YOU been?

From blondes to brunettes, we shift over to Nashville native Jenni Lee, who looks amazing in fishnets and heels:

However, she looks even MORE amazing OUT of them. Nude southern chicks RULE. That's in the Bible somewhere.

21 year-old Breanna (aka BreannaRose) makes her FOUNDRY CAMS debut in this eye-popping topless video which features (of course) Breanna, one of our old-school, ripped up FoundryMusic T-shirts, and Breanna's outstanding topless body. You'll never wish you were a tiny white thong more in your life.
Thanks to Danish heavy metal band PRETTY MAIDS for the song "Pandemonium".



Click on Breanna's ta-tas...watch the full vid...rock out for a while... then once you're all done drooling into a bucket, head on over to FOUNDRY CAMS and chat with Breanna LIVE on CAM!

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Skydiving with a Rubik's Cube, Kelly Brook at Piranha Premiere, Mystery Hiney, Joe Perry Knocks Down Steven Tyler, Dokken is Getting Old, Ashlynn Brooke, Karina Hart, and Lataya Roxx are all topless and frisky

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(but not nearly as bad as your self-esteem. How DO you make it through the day without slitting your wrists?)

If you're not jumping out of a plane on an inflatable raft, doing a Rubik's cube, then you're just a pussy:

Skydivers in the Czech Republic apparently have balls the size of basketballs.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:


Kelly Brook at the Piranha 3D Premiere (WWTDD)

and WHY should you care? Because you get to see Kelly Brook's Tits and Arse in Piranha 3D. Duh.


Gee, whose surgically-augmented ass in a bikini is this? (Drunken Stepfather)

Come ON, guess, would ya? it's not like we're going to tell you she's a former Playboy Playmate who released a sex tape through Vivid. Aw shit. We did it again.

Millionaire Couple Builds Robotic Child (Noob Dad)

Monique Alexander makes slutty look not-so-slutty in this Black & White Photo Shoot (Freakshow Planet)

2010 Summer TCA Press Tour Recap (Bullz-Eye)

Evelyn Rain Wants to show you what's Under Her shorts (z0d)
Adventures In Rihanna’s On-Stage Self-Love (The Frisky)

Seven Technologies That Are Going to Kill Us All (UPROXX)

Welcome to Nassau: They have Dope Bagels and Rich Kids (New York Pudding)

15 Ways to Fight the Freshman 15 (The Campus Socialite)

The 15 Most Famous Secrets and Glitches in Videogame History (Dorkly)

Jessica Jaymes is looking all old-school pinup in this nifty photo set (Dailyniner)

I'M SORRY:
(So sorry the only women that you can pick up are hungover stragglers from last night's pool party)

In Toronto, where AEROSMITH was on tour at the Air Canada Centre, Joe Perry knocked Steven Tyler clean off the stage:

You know, in case you haven't seen them... you should go see AEROSMITH live before Perry and Tyler strangle one another.

You're not Rockin... unless you're blowing your voice out with Don Dokken! whose voice is sounding worse every day...

DOKKEN's latest album is a collection of re-recorded classics... and it's on sale now!

From classic rock, we segue into classic RACKS...

This video of the lovely Ashlynn Brooke is not exactly what we'd call 'subtle':

Any clip that starts with a camer aimed up her skirt and her butt getting oiled up is bound to end well.

This busty Slovak chick is LaTaya Roxx, and she's deluded herself into thinking she's Batman:

Since when does Batman bounce on a trampoline with his tits hanging out? once, maybe? Exactly.

Keeping with the eastern European big-boobed babes here's Karina Hart and her obnoxiously-huge boobs:

They're packed into a teeny-tiny bikini... but honestly they don't stay in there for very long. they flop out very quickly and she shows off their 34H goodness.

Emi, who has been featured in other FOUNDRY CAMS clips, is once again shaking her tattooed tail in tribute to "Tattoos & Tequila" by VINCE NEIL of MOTLEY CRUE. We wanted her to drink Vince Neil's Tres Rios Tequila while she made this clip, but after thinking it through, we realized no one wanted to see a clip of a giggling tattooed chick falling down.


Click on Emi's very large tattoo, enjoy some Tequila if you'd like, then head on over to FOUNDRY CAMS and chat with Emi LIVE (try not to get too wasted; you don't want any of that drunk-typing happening)

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Car Theft in Buenos Aires, Anna Paquin Wet T-shirt, Shauna Sand is Waxy, Rokken with Dokken at RibFest, God Gave Rock & Wigs to KISS, Those Damned Things Debut, Sandra Romain and Anne's Lovely Bodies

Do you know why God made FRIDAY?
So that you could unscrew you head, dump out the part of your brain that contains morality and hook up with as many women as possible... just make sure the husbands are out of arms reach.

We found out that more women are having affairs than men these days...See? You come here, and you learn stuff!

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Sort of like your breath, your bald spot, your attitude, you face...shall we continue?)

How do you steal a shitbox car in Buenos Aires?

With a little elbow grease and another shitbox, apparently.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:


Anna Paquin is Deceptively Attractive (WWTDD)

Then again, Anna Paquin does like taking her clothes off on camera, so how deceptive is it really?


Oooh! A Wax Statue of Shauna Sand! Wait, no. It's really her. (Drunken Stepfather)

Shauna stick to making sex videos PLEASE...and stay inside

Lauren Anderson Lifts Up Her Tiny Plaid Skirt (Freakshow Planet)

SPLICE: Movie Review (Bullz-Eye)

32 Poorly Translated Subtitles (URLesque)

Four Ways Science Will Kick Death's Ass (UPROXX)

Roxanna, why did you bother getting dressed? Your outfit is full of holes. (Dailyniner)

Drunk Driver Jumps Car Over Airport Toll Booth (Warming Glow)

Natalia Cruz Has A kick-ass body and even more kick-ass body art (z0d)

Badass Men of Manliness: Dennis Hopper (The Bachelor Guy)

How To Fight (Funnycrave)

30 Female Celebrities Grabbing Their Own Boobs (ManOfest)


I'M SORRY:
(Sorry you forgot to wear a rubber and knocked up some skank you met online)

You know, you're just not Rockin'...

Unless you're ROKKEN with DOKKEN...at Rib Fest! Um, yeah.

God Gave Rock and Roll to You, sir...:

and God also saw fit to Give a Really Swell Wig to Paul Stanley from KISS because 60 year old men don't have hair like that.

What's this? Members of ANTHRAX and FALL OUT BOY together? In the same place:

THE DAMNED THINGS debuted at the Knitting Factory in Brooklyn, NY the other day.

From hard rock to rock-hard abs...on girls...

This is Busty Blond Southern Belle Anne from FTV Girls and she LOVES working out:

She loves working out, pulling out her boobs, working out, playing with sex toys, working out, fornicating with her hand... See? We no lie.

from hard abs to hard butts

hot ass Romanian adult super-starlet Sandra Romain is oiling up her booty:

She must have a very ashy hiney... and you can see Sandra get that hiney ravaged at BIG WET ASSES 8 - on Demand.

What's this? More fantastic shamless self-promotion?? INDEED!

You know Carmen from her many FOUNDRY CAMS videos and from her solo site - CamWithCarmen. Here's a great clip of her "Unraveling" her clothes to some music by our friends in SEVENDUST:


CLICK THE PIC TO SEE CARMEN STRIP!

Then, when the feeling returns in your arms and legs... chat with Carmen LIVE, one-on-one!

You can also get hundreds of new photos and videos at Carmen's solo site - CamWithCarmen

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Paraglider Crash, Rosie Huntington-Whitely in Transformers 3, DOKKEN is old, KILLSWITCH ENGAGE loves DIO, Jaime Hammer is Topless, Busty Brittany is Dancing

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Sort of like your shitty sense of entitlement)

Paraglider 1 + Paraglider 2 + Heavy Winds...


... = Time To go Swimming!

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:


Rosie Huntington-Whitely Was Offered Megan Fox's Gig in 'Transformers 3' (WWTDD)

She has ZERO acting experience, and looks great naked. Bravo, mister casting director!

Whose itty-bitty implants are these? (Drunken Stepfather)

You'll never guess in a million years unless of course you saw 'Almost Famous'...then you know exactly who this is

Holy Lost! – Crossing Over with the Series Finale: “The End" (The Campus Socialite)

Sara Stone is Strapped into a Corset ...and not much else (Freakshow Planet)

MacGruber: Movie Review (Bullz-Eye)

Adele Stevens Meets the Luckiest Garden Hose EVER (Dailyniner)

More Awesome Red Dead Redemption Glitches (GammaSquad)

Men’s College Lacrosse Final Four Match-ups Set (The Campus Socialite)

Marissa Ann Shows off Her School Colors...and Her hiney (z0d)

Exclusive Interview With NCAA Football 11 Developers (GameCenter)

We Don't Need No Stinkin Buttons: Kenneth Cole Touch Screen Watch (The Bachelor Guy)

Former Kids TV Writer Teaches Us How to 'Cook to Bang' (Asylum)


I'M SORRY:
(Sorry you forgot to skim the pool and change the kegs in a timely fashion. Maybe next time you won't have to sleep in the garage)

Remember when DOKKEN (click to download) did "Dream Warriors" back in 1987?

The 2010 version is a little... err, A LOT... different.

Those nice boys in KILLSWITCH ENGAGE paid homage to Ronnie James Dio with their version of "Holy Diver":

...at the annnual "Rock on the Range" Festival in Ohio...

From very Metal to Very Big Boobies...

Busty Brunette Babe Jaime Hammer is topless in Tiny Lace panties...and that's just the way we like her:

And once the boobies come out, the fun's just getting started...next up - Backgammon!

Keeping on the big boobie thing Busty Brittany from Brittany's Bod is dancing in her room naked:

We'd like to be in there with her, but we're not allowed within 1000 feet... of her, that is.

What's this? More fantastic shamless self-promotion?? INDEED!

You know Carmen from her many FOUNDRY CAMS videos and from her solo site - CamWithCarmen. Here's a great clip of her "Unraveling" her clothes to some music by our friends in SEVENDUST:


CLICK THE PIC TO SEE CARMEN STRIP!

Then, when the feeling returns in your arms and legs... chat with Carmen LIVE, one-on-one!

You can also get hundreds of new photos and videos at Carmen's solo site - CamWithCarmen

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Tuesday Links: Palin Heckler Stomped, Heidi Montag Might be single, Looking Up Mila Kunis' shirt, DOKKEN and MEGADETH live, Violet's new Video

THAT's TERRIBLE:

(Just like your very existence. You suck at life, and it's a miracle you haven't blown your own head off yet)

A young heckler went to a Sarah Palin rally...




and all he got was these lousy footprints on his neck.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:



ANDREW W.K. picks his Five Favorite Restaurants in New York City (Immaculate Infatuation)





Heidi Montag is Single! Maybe! (WWTDD)



...and because we know you want it... Heidi Montag is Naked! Almost!





Mila Kunis, we can see up your shirt! (Drunken Stepfather)



Oh Mila Kunis... you are such a tease...



Seven Types of Animal Lawn Ornaments Explained (Gunaxin)



Lana Lopez is holding a bass guitar...A VERY LUCKY...bass. (Freakshow Planet)



Mallory Clark Makes a Bikini Look Better (Bullz-Eye)



Karlie Montana is all Tied Up (Dailyniner)



INDEPENDENCE DAY 2 & 3 Shooting Back-To-Back (FilmDrunk)



Top 10 Sexiest Movie Milfs (Heckler Spray)



Boner Jamz! Hot Girls in Sexy Music Videos with kung fu and explosions! (Dave and Thomas)



Sidney Moon peels herself out of her pink lingrie (z0d)



8 Ways To Make Your Pet An Internet Sensation (UPROXX)



A Review of 6 Axe Body Spray Scents (FunnyCrave)



Win the South Park Complete 13th Season Uncensored on Blu-Ray (The Bachelor Guy)





I'M SORRY:

(Sorry that toxic personality is equalled only by your toxic halitosis. Here's a toothbrush, dummy)

Our friends in DOKKEN hit the stage in San Antonio, and original guitarist George Lynch joined them for "Tooth and Nail":



There's some talk of all original members getting back together... one can only dream (sarcasm mode off).

speaking of semi-reunited...

Those guys in the almost reunited MEGADETH played "Lucretia" in Atlanta:



Who wants to place bets on how long it takes Dave Ellefson to get into a fist fight with Dave Mustaine?

From Heavy Metal to Heavy Hooters....

The legendary adult starlet Tera Patrick is itching to get out of her tight shirt:



This clip gets a lot raunchier but we don't want to go to prison... so click the link.

keeping with the big boobs theme...

Megan Voss is one of PLAYBOY's Busty Babes:



...Big Boobs. MILF... and that's that.

Ravishing, Raven-haired, busty pinup girl Violet, who has done several FOUNDRY CAMS videos for us, has a brand new solo site, and to celebrate, she's shaking her fantastic figure to BRET MICHAELS' new song "Lie To Me":






Click on Violet Right Now, and stare slack-jawed at her awesomeness!

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?


We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did



FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing



Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates



be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep



We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.



We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.



We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.



FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Monday Links: MLK Day Madness, Exploding Wine Box, Night Ranger and All Star NAMM Jam, Golden Globes Hilarity, Carmella Bing and Sasha Cane

It's MLK Day and we're doing exactly what the good doctor would have wanted. We think.

It's Just what you were waiting for Bam Margera and Gina Lynn. Together. At. Last.



Get 'FantASStic Whores 4' now...classy, right?

Read up on all of our ass-tastic reviews - online in the SHOP section. We'll be adding up more every day!



THAT's TERRIBLE:

A box of wine is a fancy beverage for fancy people. What happens when you put one in a cheap Microwave oven?




Don't buy a Microwave and DON'T blow shit up in it. That's just silly.

THAT's NOT-SO TERRIBLE:

(but your sour puss is. How's about removing it with a kitchen knife?)





Which award-winning actress hit the Golden Globes looking like Bigfoot in a dress? (WWTDD)




Mischa Barton has a new gig
(Drunken Stepfather)



who wants to see Mischa Barton's ta-ta's?!?! *raises hand*



Bryleigh Rayne is trying to play shy. It's not working (z0d)





Girl Next Door: Cristy Mendevil (Bullz-Eye)



Georgia and Jana are touching tongues...and that's not all! (Daily Niner)



The Women of 24...All of them (FunnyCrave)



Veronica Saint...is no saint. We just thought of that. (FreakshowPlanet)



Hoops for Haiti Raises over $1 Million for Charity (Buster Sports)



Umbrellas, Tyson, and Blue People: The 2010 Golden Globe (Yep Yep)



Mariah Carey's Cleavage would not be denied (Don Chavez)



The 10 Dumbest Things Billy Bush Said Last Night at the Golden Globes (FilmDrunk)



15 Rock Stars that Went Off the Deep End (Fork Party)

I'M SORRY:

(Sorry that you think your grudge-holding skills could win you a Nobel Prize. If the Swedes gave those out, that is.)

Busty brunette adul starlet Carmella Bing is showing off her Double-D Cups:



Being topless makes knob-gobbling so much easier.

Sexy, sultry, surgically-augmented Sasha Cane rides the stripper pole in he VIP room:



There's a lot more going on after the jump...drool bib, time.

When you close your eyes, do you dream about NIGHT RNAGER?



We thought you might. That's why we posted this clip from this weekend's jam at NAMM.

Speaking of NAMM, here's Don Dokken, Carmine Appice, Paul Gilbert, Doug Aldrich, and Uli Jon Roth doing the CREAM classic "Sunshine Of Your Love":



You should be Rockin' with Dokken. Everyone else is. Seriously.

Blond, BISEXUAL Lizzy from FOUNDRY CAMS has a lot of tattoos. That's an understatement. Thanks to our buds in SwampDaWamp for giving us the song "Lady".






CLICK ON THOSE TATTOOED TA-TA's!

Take a break from hitting on the lonely MILF next door, and recap what we added to the MEDIA SECTION, including:



Exploding Box Of Wine in a Microwave

NIGHT RANGER: "When You Close Your Eyes" Acoustic LIVE at NAMM

Sasha Cane Rides the Stripper Pole

All Star Namm Jam - 'Sunshine Of Your Love' - LIVE at NAMM

Carmella Bing Busts out her DD Cups

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?


FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing



Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates



be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep



We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.



We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.



We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.



FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.