Fat Man Crying, Simpsons Adult Satire Trailer, OZZY's Lipton commercial, Muppet Upskirt? Billy Gibbons and NUNO in a PUSHKING video, Priya Anjali Rai and Katie Kox Oiling Up

*Drumroll* ... This man has to wear shoes on his shoulders? Oh. Umm... Wait.

He's one of those fellas who has a crush on a co-worker and acts on it...and never gets caught.

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Baby it's cold outside...but you don't have to worry because you weigh 300 lbs)

This is the best video of a fat man crying you'll ever see...

His name is Paul Mason and he's the fattest man in Britain. He's not happy about his benefits being cut.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:

(but your general state of health IS...)

Because we really needed this to happen, apparently... It's the XXX Satire of The Simpsons courtesy of our friends at Hustler:

Boy oh boy that's A LOT of yellow body paint.

See? We no lie. Clicky Click Click


Whose dress is flying up in a Muppet Movie?? (Drunken Stepfather)

We never would have guessed...and you probably won't either...but DAMN she's got a smokin' bod

Ashley Brookes is barely wearing a shirt and jeans (FreakShow Planet)

Bullz-Eye attends the 2011 North American International Auto Show (Bullz-Eye)

Samantha Saint is wearing high heels...and that's it (Dailyniner)

Roxy Carter is playing soccer... wait, no she's not (How about We...)



I'M SORRY:
(Sorry that you can't eat frosting for every meal, tubb-o)

oh give the man a break... OZZY OSBOURNE is hawking Iced Tea:

he's paid his dues. Let the old fart Prince of Darkness make a few bucks.

Billy Gibbons from ZZ TOP and Nuno from EXTREME showed up in this video from Russia's PUSHKING:

Smile, Billy...Smile.

From fully-clothed bands to partially-clothed adult starlets...

What do you do when you're a stunning 33-year-old Indian MILF like Priya Anjali Rai?

Well, You feel yourself up outside with a bottle of oil. Duh.

Continuing on with the oily-boobies motif...

25 year-old Las Vegas native Katie Kox has 36E-sized boobs. And that's all we have on that.

Oh wait...also, she likes to get them slathered up with baby oil. Now THAT's research!



...and that, as they say, is that. Now go enjoy the day and try not to offend anyone with your horrendous stench...

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Kendra's video RULES, Police Offer Frees Dog, 50 Cent Looks Great, Jonah Hex Trailer 2, Bon Jovi at Giants Stadium, Bret Michaels On American Idol, Jorn Lande's DIO Tribute, Busty Ellen and Jamie Graham

Just in case you missed the big news...we're having a party over here because...

Kendra Exposed: The Kendra Wilkinson Sex Tape is AVAILABLE NOW...and it's the most AMAZING video ever... next to the Zapruder film.

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Sort of like your shitty sense of entitlement)

A Plattsburg, Missouri police officer rescued a trapped pooch from a fence a while back:


... and then the dog went and did something just... silly.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:

The second trailer for the big screen adaptation of JONAH HEX is online:


You got yer Josh Brolin, you got your Megan Fox... *drool*, oh and don't forget John Malkovich. Oh, and LOTS of shit blowing up.

50 CENT Looks Great! (WWTDD)


Sex & The See-Through Shirt... Guess who? (Drunken Stepfather)

OK, so we limited it to a potential FOUR women...but this one is by FAR the most do-able of the bunch...and we have seen her boobies on screen.

A Tribute to Silence of the Lambs’ Buffalo Bill (Gunaxin)

Shay Laren and Her Huge Hooters are Hanging out by the Pool (Freakshow Planet)

A Chat with Richard Roeper (Bullz-Eye)

PLAYBOY's Kathleen Edge is Getting Naked ...in the study... with a candlestick... get it? CLUE joke. (Dailyniner)

The 50 Hottest World Cup WAGs of All-Time (Bleacher Report)

Step Right Up And See The Twitter (UPROXX)

Stacy Silver Shows off The Luckiest Leather Undies EVER (z0d)

Worst Death Ever: Car Crash With Flatbed Truck Hauling 17 million Bees (GammaSquad)

The 12 most awesome cowboys in TV & film history (Guyism)

A Fear Of Hobos (FunnyCrave)


I'M SORRY:
(Sorry you forgot to skim the pool and change the kegs in a timely fashion. Maybe next time you won't have to sleep in the garage)

Our buds in BON JOVI are on the road (click to get your mitts on the best tix!) and they christened the new Meadowlands Stadium last night:

It was an intimate affair. In front of about 50,000 screaming fans. get your tickets, kids!.

Once again, our pal BRET MICHAELS (load up that iPod, damn you) defied his doctors once again and hit the stage on American Idol last night:

...Casey James looked like a happy boy, doesn't he? Woulda been happier if he WON...but her DIDN'T.

Norwegian Metal Crooner JORN LANDE (who has been in more bands than we can count) recorded a tribute to the late great Ronnie James Dio:

Jorn Lande and his fu manchu are uber-serious.

From Rock Gods to Hot Bods...

Breastacular Busty Ellen and her 34G Boobs went for a ride...with her top down:

Get it? Top Down? Topless? Naked? Eh?

Shapely PLAYBOY babe Jamie Graham is totally nude... in the shower:

As opposed to clothed? is there any other way to shower? Evidently not.

What's this? More fantastic shamless self-promotion?? INDEED!

You know Carmen from her many FOUNDRY CAMS videos and from her solo site - CamWithCarmen. Here's a great clip of her "Unraveling" her clothes to some music by our friends in SEVENDUST:


CLICK THE PIC TO SEE CARMEN STRIP!

Then, when the feeling returns in your arms and legs... chat with Carmen LIVE, one-on-one!

You can also get hundreds of new photos and videos at Carmen's solo site - CamWithCarmen

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Kendra Exposed Released Today, Drunk Fat Girl, Drunk Russian Guy, Richie Kotzen in Philly, Y&T does DIO, Kirra Lynne's Booty, Natalie Sparks Loves Lotion

Today is the day, boys and girls...

Kendra Exposed: The Kendra Wilkinson Sex Tape is being released today...a week early...because a nation of total filthbags (us included) couldn't wait.

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(Sort of like your shitty sense of entitlement)

This chubby girl rolling around in the mud at Ohio's 7Fest could be the least flattering clip we have seen all day:


Insert pig-in-mud reference HERE.

Speaking of drunks, check out this Russian guy who tumbles down a subway escalator:


Thank GOD the light fixture to the face broke his fall.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:


Lindsay is CURED! (WWTDD)

THANK GOD! because the sooner she can get back to making low-budget skin flicks, the better! Amiright? Amiright?

Whose big old lady boobs are these??? (Drunken Stepfather)

We'd love to point you to some titty pics of her but apparently she's WAY too uptight to let those funbags fly...and she doesn't take it in the butt...allegedly.

Johnny B. Goode: Back to the Future 1 & 2 Simultaneous (Dave and Thomas)

Penthouse Pet Ryan Keely looks Regal in this Black-and-White Photo Shoot (Freakshow Planet)

Girl Next Door: Emily (Bullz-Eye)

Georgia Jones is the Sweetest Peach we've seen all Day (Dailyniner)

Worst National Anthem Performances (Gunaxin)

It's Always Sunny in Philly goes into syndication Mon. Here's their new "The Drunks Are On Us" clip (TheBachelorGuy)

Riley Evans Really Likes Getting Naked (z0d)

Top 20 WTF Movie Moments (The Campus Socialite)

A Practical Guide to Watching Porn With Your Girlfriend (FunnyCrave)


I'M SORRY:
(Sorry you forgot to skim the pool and change the kegs in a timely fashion. Maybe next time you won't have to sleep in the garage)

You may know RICHIE KOTZEN (click for discography) from his time in POISON and MR BIG:

He rarely does shows in the U.S., and this is him in Philadelphia - at the North Star Bar.

Los Angeles rock vets Y&T paid homage to Ronnie James Dio with their version of "Rainbow In The Dark":

Y&T, boy... um, we got nothing.

From great guitars to great asses...

Hiney-rific Kirra Lynne is oiling down her booty:

if you're dying to see what else happened to her hiney watch BIG WET ASSES #14 - On Demand Now!

Nicely-shaped Natalie Sparks Loves Lotion:

That's not ALL she loves. Natalie Loves all kinds of Dirty Things.

What's this? More fantastic shamless self-promotion?? INDEED!

You know Carmen from her many FOUNDRY CAMS videos and from her solo site - CamWithCarmen. Here's a great clip of her "Unraveling" her clothes to some music by our friends in SEVENDUST:


CLICK THE PIC TO SEE CARMEN STRIP!

Then, when the feeling returns in your arms and legs... chat with Carmen LIVE, one-on-one!

You can also get hundreds of new photos and videos at Carmen's solo site - CamWithCarmen

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Guido Wipes out, BATMAN XXX Parody, Jenna Jameson in an Ambluance, Mystery Ass Crack, New SOULFLY video, Angel Dark and her Loose Lingerie, New FoundryCams video

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(just like the smell you leave behind when you walk out of a room)

This motorcycle Guido gets his leg smashed by another motorcycle Guido during Guido street race


You see that blur? Yeah, that's the Guido. Well, ONE of them.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:

It was only a matter of time before the sanctity (sarcasm) of BATMAN was whacked upside the head with a XXX-Porn-Parody:


Vivid Entertainment will release 'BATMAN' on May 25th - order now!.

Jenna Jameson is being wheeled into an ambulance (WWTDD)

...and here we see Jenna Jameson being twisted into a pretzel in some of her more memorable roles


Which Hollywood hottie is showing off her trucker-butt here? (Drunken Stepfather)

Here's a clue: she's been in a whole bunch of flops... Hmm... maybe that doesn't help much.

Naomi Campbell Insists Her Men Don't Have to Be Rich...Really! (PopEater)

April O'Neil will get naked in April, May, June... or any month (Freakshow Planet)

Top 5 Light Beers (Bullz-Eye)

Ariel Gives us one less reason to not like redheads (Dailyniner)

Iron Chef's Tips on Handling a Blow Torch (Asylum)

Iron Man 2 Alternate Takes (College Humor)

Watch A True Phillie Phanatic Face Some Rough Justice (The Campus Socialite)

Nice Perky Nubs and a Smoking Hot Bod - it's Dakota Rivers (z0d)

How Tough Are Hockey Players? (Dave & Thomas)

Wanna have lunch with Emanuelle Chiquiri, party with Playmates, and hoop it up with Shaq? Here's how (The Bachelor Guy)
PIRANHA 3D's Viral Marketing Parody Is Vulgar and Boob-Filled (FilmDrunk)


I'M SORRY:
(Sorry that there's no Nobel Prize for holding grudges...because you'd get it for sure!)

Have you seen the soothing new SOULFLY's new video for "Rise Of the Fallen"?:

Wait, sorry... 'soothing' doesn't apply. OMEN will be out on May 25th.

From Heavy Metal to Hot Ass...

Sexy Slovak Angel Dark can't keep her shirt on ... or her bra for that matter:

She must be a very impatient gal. *rimshot*

and since we like shameless self-promotion as much as the next fella

Here's Samantha in one of our official FoundryMusic T-Shirts shaking her ass to "Satisfied" by SOCIAL CODE:

CLICK THE PIC TO SEE SAMANTHA's SEXY STRIP!
(well it almost rhymes)

Then, when you have some motor function back... chat with Samantha LIVE, one-on-one, on her cam!

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Thursday Links: Lousy Brazilian Drivers, New Freddy Krueger clip, Kate Hudson's New Hooters, Catherine Zeta-Jones Nude in Allure, New OZZY single, Steve Vai and Mary J Blige Cover Zeppelin, Shione Cooper and Eva Evangelina Show their goods

Tax Day? Wait, wuzzat? Heh. If only.
Spend some of that hard-earned federal refund and blow it on women, booze, and hotel rooms... that'll stimulate the economy reeeeel nice.

More girls = More fun it's written in the adultery handbook somewhere...so have an affair and stimulate yourself...and the economy.

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(as is your breath, your hairline, and your attitude. Set yourself on fire, whydontcha?)

A Brazilian motorcyclist goes for a tumble over a car hood...


Brazil is great for one thing... and it ain't driving skills...just ask Mike!

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:

This clip from the upcoming re-make of A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET shows us a bit more of Kentucky-fried Krueger, as played by Jackie Earle Haley:


Will new Michael-Bay produced version do justice to the original A Nightmare on Elm Street Sers? Only time will tell, kids.


Kate Hudson got herself Breast Implants (WWTDD)

because honestly if you've seen her naked nubs before...you'd know she was in need.


Catherine Zeta-Jones is Nude in Allure (Drunken Stepfather)

Which is slightly more classy than every other time we've seen Catherine Zeta-Jones nude..

Chick Fights: A Photo Tribute (FunnyCrave)

A Chat With Hugh Hefner (Bullz-Eye)

Alana Cragin is Makin us all kinds of happy in the pants (Freakshow Planet)

Melissa Jacobs from PENTHOUSE is a naked li'l Devil who isn't afraid to pull out her pitchfork and pull back her panties (Dailyniner)

Dogs and Cats Review the iPad (GammaSquad)

A Boston Red Sox Hater Guide (FunnyCrave)

Nerd Body Odor Out of Control at MIT (Asylum)

Five Facebook Rules To Live By (UPROXX)

Angie and Brianna are totally naked and totally friendly (z0d)

Win the Red Truck From OK Go's 'This Too Shall Pass' Video (URLesque)

The Jumbo Flask. Think of it as a Big Gulp for Booze (The Bachelor Guy)

Eva Amurri Proves that Nepotism is Awesome (Gunaxin)

I'M SORRY:
(Sorry that you forgot to clean the pool and change the kegs this weekend. Chop chop, errand boy!)

Our old pal OZZY OSBOURNE has a new single called "Let Me Hear you Scream":

OZZY's new disc, "Scream" is set to hit stores on June 12, 2010 via Epic Records. Sounds like Ozzy to us. Whatchoo think?

Taking a slight turn toward the mellow, MARY J. BLIGE decided to take on LED ZEPPELIN's "Stairway to Heaven":

Of course she had a little help from STEVE VAI and ORIANTHI...and RANDY JACKSON, let's not forget him.

From rock to racks...

Sexy Czech and busty bombshell Shione Cooper is working out her massive chest:

Evidently, she's never seen a Thighmaster commercial.

and from Boobs, we move on to Bath time...

Adult film starlet Eva Evangelina must be a very very busty gal:

Becuase apparently the only time she can grant interviews is while she's taking a bath...not that we're objecting...nosiree!

Ravishing, Raven-haired, busty pinup girl Violet, who has done several FOUNDRY CAMS videos for us, has a brand new solo site, and to celebrate, she's shaking her fantastic figure to BRET MICHAELS' new song "Lie To Me":


Click on Violet Right Now, and stare slack-jawed at her awesomeness!

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Friday Links: T-Boned Ambulance, Shiny Booty, Music Videos, Music Headlines, More Hotness from around the World

Looking for a special someone? Got a special someone, and looking for another one? Why not browse a whole bunch of MARRIED special someones! At least you know they'll keep quiet, you know?

THAT's TERRIBLE:

Driving in Russia looks like fun, doesn't it?.



Yup. That ambulance needed a beating.

(We'll give you ONE guess as to whose enormous ass this is)

Here's a hint...she another C-lister who likes to make sex tapes with her boyfriend.

New Music Headlines: Get the latest on DROWNING POOL, RIGGS, LACUNA COIL, ANTHRAX and more in our Massive Music Headline Archive

(speaking of music, here's something nifty)

It's SALIVA doing their thing LIVE in Maine.



Josey Scott is recuperating from surgery, so the band is off the sNO CORE tour.

(While we're on the music subject, the boys in MÖTLEY CRÜE are doing CRÜE FEST 2 this Summer!)

Pictured on stage at Madison Square Garden (March 16, 2009): John Allen of CHARM CITY DEVILS, Tyler Connolly of THEORY OF A DEADMAN, Vince Neil of MÖTLEY CRÜE, Sully Erna of GODSMACK, Ryan McCombs of DROWNING POOL

CRÜE FEST 2 - Click for Tickets!

("CRÜE"... brings us back to "boobs"...because the two often do go together)

This sexy Czech is Markéta Belonohá, and she's wearing a pearl necklace. Seriously. That's not even a cute pun.

This oily young Canadian teen is Paris Pirelli, and we really hope she's got a mop to clean up after this clip.

(now if we can have your attention over here)

Our own Jesse Jo and Tori from FOUNDRY CAMS are naughty nurses shaking it to "Flatline" by DUFF McKAGAN's LOADED:





CLICK THE PIC TO CHECK OUT THE VIDEO





And of course, after your pulse gets back to normal, head over to FOUNDRY CAMS and chat with Jesse Jo and Tori LIVE on cam!



Bands and labels, if you want YOUR music featued in a FOUNDRY CAMS video, you should send your CDs and press kits to:



FoundryMusic

c/o DFL MEDIA, LLC

PO Box 257

Millington, NJ

07946

Check out our review of This Ain't The Munsters XXX



...as well as many other wonderful titles in our ADULT REVIEW SECTION

If you can stop fooling around with your neighbor's daughter for a few minutes, check out what we added to the MEDIA SECTION, including:



Paris Pirelli Covers Herself with Baby Oil In The Kitchen

Caught on Camera: Ambulance gets broadsided in Russian Intersection

PLAYBOY Playmate Hope Dworaczyk Morning Ritual

Amputee MMA Fighter Kyle Maynard Debut in Alabama

Markéta Bělonohá Plays with her Pearl Necklace

Hockey Fan Fellatio During Playoff Game

Danielle Hauls out Her Huge Hooters at the Beach

SALIVA: 'Hunt You Down' LIVE in Maine

I'M SORRY:

These are some of the many social networking programs we're linked up with, so JOIN US, won't you?


Posterous

Twitter: FoundryMusic (you can get updates to your cell phone here as well)

MySpace: FoundryMusic

NING: FoundryMusic

FRIEND FEED: FoundryMusic

FUBAR: FoundryMusic

Facebook: FoundryMusic

Break.com: NSFW videos (we put all the dirty vids in one location)

Vidilife: FoundryMusic (updated daily)

LiveVideo: FoundryMusic (updated daily)