Reporter nailed with Soccer Ball, Heidi Montag Wants Her Implants OUT, OZZY breaks out the oldies, SHADOWS FALL breaks out the OZZY, PLAYBOY's Barbie Boswell, Madison James, and Monika all sans-clothing

What a day, what a day, thank F-ing God it's... "Hump Day"? hell, ANY day of the week is good for humping, now isn't it?

Quit stalling and have relations with a horny co-worker in a bathroom stall. Get it? Stall / Stall?

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(But not even remotely as bad as your receding hairline and breath. Here's a mint and some Rogaine)

Rogue Soccer Ball + Female Reporter's Head = ALWAYS funny:

Now kids... Don't go out and buy a bunch of soccer balls to kick at reporters. That would be WRONG. Funny, but wrong.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:


Heidi Montag wants her Implants Out (WWTDD)

Ehh, all we heard was 'blah, blah, blah, HEIDI MONTAG, something something' when the FUCK is Vivid going to release the goddamn Heidi Montag Sex tape??? Hell YES, we're impatient!


Tila Tequila has a band-aid on her face boo-boo (Drunken Stepfather)

Now THAT is a girl who NEEDS to make a Celebrity Sex Tape. Then we MIGHT be interested.

The 8 Hottest Guy-On-Girl Oral Sex Scenes (The Frisky)

Tiffany Joy will fill your heart (and shorts) with Joy (Freakshow Planet)

Girl Next Door: Jessica Marie (Bullz-Eye)

Faye Reagan has some of the biggest nips we have EVER seen (z0d)

Madison Scott and Her Friend Get all kinds of Freaky in the Shower (Dailyniner)

Movies That Would Have Been Ruined by Facebook (MovieFone)

New Solar System Found, We Hope They Have Dinosaurs (GammaSquad)

Twilight Crew Scared After Brazilian Standoff (FilmDrunk)

Larry Johnson’s $2290 Bar Tab From the Night He Allegedly Spit in a Women’s Face (BroBible)

I'M SORRY:
(Sorry that most of your friends' names are plastered on the front of whiskey bottles)

Long time personal friend (no, seriously...really) OZZY OSBOURNE dusted off "Killer Of Giants" for the nice folks in Italy:

the Italians must be longing for anti-war anthems. OZZY OSBOURNE is on tour now Get Them Tickets now!

Speaking of OZZY OSBOURNE, the guys in SHADOWS FALL have a killer version of "Bark at the Moon":

They broke this out at the Rockstar Music Energy Festival and made the metalheads very chipper.

Metal...meet mama's boobs!!

would you take a look at the boobs on PLAYBOY's Barbie Boswell! Those are the kind of things you could paint a portrait of:

Barbie is tall, tan, hails from Florida, and looks really great without her clothes on. Wouldn't it be a shame if she didn't? Hah.

Booty-tastic Madison James has an ass that was made for grabbing and shaking. If only that dipshit cameraman would shut up:

She shakes it and wiggles it just enough before getting herself tag-teamed by two gentlemen...and we use the term 'Gentlemen' loosely.

21 year-old sexy, slender Czech babe Monika is way too hot in that blue sun dress:

who could blame her really? Oh - and Monika can also fit her whole hand in her mouth. Classy, right?

Emi, who has been featured in other FOUNDRY CAMS clips, is once again shaking her tattooed tail in tribute to "Tattoos & Tequila" by VINCE NEIL of MOTLEY CRUE. We wanted her to drink Vince Neil's Tres Rios Tequila while she made this clip, but after thinking it through, we realized no one wanted to see a clip of a giggling tattooed chick falling down.


Click on Emi's very large tattoo, enjoy some Tequila if you'd like, then head on over to FOUNDRY CAMS and chat with Emi LIVE (try not to get too wasted; you don't want any of that drunk-typing happening)

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

QUEENSRYCHE singer wears eyeliner, Heidi Montag Sex Tape Drama, MOTLEY CRUE at Ozzfest, MARTY FRIEDMAN's new Video, Topless fun with Gia Malone, September Carrino, and Sara Stone

Hip, hip, Hoo... blech. It's Monday. the pants have to be on, and your spicy latina co-worker has to go home... because her kids are bound to be wondering where she is.

yeah, right... Like you never fooled around with someone at work. Unless you work at a slaughterhouse, in which case the blood is a bit of a turn off.

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(But not even remotely as bad as your receding hairline and breath. Here's a mint and some Rogaine)

We're fans of QUEENSRYCHE, but the amount of eyeliner singer Geoff Tate is wearing has been a little suspect:

granted, they are doing the whole Queensyche Cabaret thing, but ease up on the eye makeup, wouldya? No? OK. Fine. We have no pull.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:


Heidi Montag, Karissa Shanon made a lesbian sex tape (WWTDD)

Well OF COURSE they did. Why Wouldn't they have... Vivid Entertainment says the real money lies with a Spencer/Heidi sex tape. Who knew Vivid liked the dick so much? (pun intended)


ooh! an ass in a purple bikini! Who could it be? (Drunken Stepfather)

We're betting on 'Who Gives a Shit?' but you, however might just want to know what this Not-So-Ugly Betty is all about. See? That was just the right amount of hint, wasn't it?

A History of (Sports) Violence (The Campus Socialite)

Sophie Moone Can Moon us any day of the week (Freakshow Planet)

Interview With Spike Lee (Bullz-Eye)

Jazmine Lyn Likes Looking at Her Boobs. Funny, so do we (z0d)

Janelle Priego is ridding herself of her pesky lingerie (Dailyniner)

How to Make a Game Out of a Movie (That Doesn't Suck) (UPROXX)

I'M SORRY:
(Sorry that most of your friends' names are plastered on the front of whiskey bottles)

Our pals in MOTLEY CRUE are on the road with OZZFEST, and this is what Vince Neil looked like in Hartford the other night:

Thanks to Mike for the great footage.

After several years in MEGADETH, and then bailing to live in Tokyo, this is what MARTY FRIEDMAN is up to:

So THAT's what living in Japan for ten years will do to your guitar playing.

From Great Guitarists to Great Big Boobies...

Busty blond MILF Gia Malone can't wait to show off her boobies:

She pulls them out in the passenger seat before getting slammed in the living room. You know, she's an active older gal.

Now, for the high-brow audience...naturally large-breasted September Carrino is bouncing on her bed:

Her boobs are obnoxiously huge, so watching them bounce freely like that just makes us giggle.

We're going to nominate Sara Stone for Secretary of the Year:

She gives her agitated boss a nice back rub... and a whole helluva lot more...because she's a good egg.

Emi, who has been featured in other FOUNDRY CAMS clips, is once again shaking her tattooed tail in tribute to "Tattoos & Tequila" by VINCE NEIL of MOTLEY CRUE. We wanted her to drink Vince Neil's Tres Rios Tequila while she made this clip, but after thinking it through, we realized no one wanted to see a clip of a giggling tattooed chick falling down.


Click on Emi's very large tattoo, enjoy some Tequila if you'd like, then head on over to FOUNDRY CAMS and chat with Emi LIVE (try not to get too wasted; you don't want any of that drunk-typing happening)

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Weekend Flings, Worst SUV Driver, Church collapsing, Lindsay Stole a Rolex, Massive Melon Mystery, Steve Vai and Orianthi do 'Stairway', Brazil Loves MEGADETH, Jenny Hendrix is Oily, Huge Polish Hooters

It's time to make some reservations and spend the holiday weekend banging that sexy co-worker you've had your eye on:

This pristine motel room is brought to you by the people who encourage inter-office affairs. Bring a few changes of clothes.

Because if you don't move soon, the Dancing Bear is going to pick up where you left off...

If you don't fill that empty spot, then SOMEONE...or SOMETHING...has to.

THAT's TERRIBLE:
(just like your attitude and your face. Please adjust both accordingly... with a chainsaw))

Your SUV is mounting the car in front of it...


...you're officially the WORST driver on the planet.

Man builds church to honor God. God makes rain to destroy church...


Oh no. It's the Apocalypse. Everybody Run.

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:


Lindsay Stole a $35,000 Rolex! (WWTDD)

Hey-O! Maybe she can get in on a work release program that involves her dancing topless or getting chopped into pieces


They're hypnotic, aren't they? Guess who these babies belong to? (Drunken Stepfather)

Come on, it's an easy one brain-dead, blond, and will alter her body drastically to get famous... Shit, we just described every woman in Hollywood. Sorry.

Kim Kardashian: My Husband Beat, Abused Me (PopEater)

Riley Jensen has that all-around innocent girl look...oooh, and she's showing off her pink taco (Freakshow Planet)

TV Power Rankings - Spring 2010 Edition (Bullz-Eye)

Uma Stone is lettting the fresh mountain air graze across her lack of pubic hair (Dailyniner)

20 English Models (DJMICK)

Evidence that the University of Texas at Austin is Playboy’s Top Party School (TheCampusThrone)

Mickey Rourke As A Dog-Loving Ghengis Khan? Yes, Please. (FilmDrunk)

Valentina Vaughn is wearing a very tiny White Thong...and that's it (z0d)

Cougar sighting: 19-year-old Kick-Ass star Aaron Johnson's fianceé/baby mama is 42 (FilmDrunk)

KFC + Krispy Kreme = Luther Double Down (TopCultured)

Top 10 Classic Facebook Fails (TheBachelorGuy)

Accurate Carnival Signs (CollegeHumor)


I'M SORRY:
(Sorry that the only ass you get is the lingering stench on a toilet seat)

On Idol Gives Back the other night, STEVE VAI and ORIANTHI gave a li'l help to MARY J. BLIGE for her performance of LED ZEPPELIN's "Stairway to Heaven":

Of course we can't forget Randy Jackson and Travis Barker... they helped too.

Hot damn, them folks in Brazil sure do enjoy the MEGADETH, now don't they?

Listen to them chant along with "Symphony Of Destruction"... them's is possessed!

you know what else Brazilians enjoy?? Brazilians Enjoy Prostitutes!

From big guitars to big booty (like we don't use that line endlessly...)

There's a reason Jenny Hendrix from Big Wet Asses won the 2009 AVN Award for 'Best Threeway Sex Scene' for her role in The Jenny Hendrix Anal Experience:

She's a girl that's willing to go the extra mile... like oiling up her round hiney in BIG WET ASSES 16 - on Demand Now.

Step aside large bottom, we have LARGE BOSOMS to showcase!

Everyone say 'Hi' to Enormously Chesty Polish Gal Rachaela:

Her 36F-sized bosoms cannot be contained by mere fabric... nosiree! Adios, shirt! Here comes the fun...bags.

Why do we love sending out enormous old school FoundryMusic T-Shirts to our FOUNDRY CAMS girls? Because we love seeing what girls like Brooke and Sweet Victoria wind up doing with them. In this case, they made a vest and a miniskirt, respectively.
Thanks to our friends in FRAMING HANLEY for "Stupid Girl".

Click on Brooke blond locks, and stare wide-eyed at the screen for a while

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?

We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did

FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing

Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates

be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep

We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.

We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.

We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.

FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Tuesday Links: Driver vs. Rockslide, 10 ft Unicycle fail, Big Boobs get a gal a job, Kirstie Alley = Swamp Thing, New Bullet for my Valentine,New RATT

THAT's TERRIBLE:

(So is your smile. Keep your mouth shut, or risk having all of your teeth chisled out)

53 year-old Ralph + 10 ft tall Unicycle = 5 seconds of pure hilarity




Why is Ralph's old ass on a unicycle anyway?

Want to see the world's most oblivious man drive straight into the most obvious Rockslide?




of COURSE you do. Why else you dicking around here?

THAT's Not-So-TERRIBLE:





Somebody's great big new boobs landed her a movie role (Drunken Stepfather)



Gee, Whoooo could it be? maybe someone who wasn't that famous to begin with? Eeeeeyah. Probably.





Holy Shit! SWAMP THING is REAL! (WWTDD)



Wait wait...no. Sorry. it's just Kirstie Alley. Sheesh. Remember when she was hot?



Need help filling out your March Madness bracket? (Scores Report)



Rachel Roxxx rocks the big booty (FreakshowPlanet)



Attn Nerdy Poker Fans: How to play online poker with your Rock Band instruments (The Bachelor Guy)



Sigrid has an awful name...but awfully nice nubs (z0d)



The Corned Beef and Cabbage Cocktail. You know, for St. Patty's Day (The Bachelor Guy)



Bianca Beauchamp has big boobs, an amazing booty, and umm... what were we saying? (Dailyniner)



Superhero De-motivational Posters (Gunaxin)



65 Craziest Basketball Fans (Comedy)



The 10 Funniest Public Access Prank Calls Of All Time (Manofest)



Homemade Rocket Fuel is AWESOME (TodaysBigThing)



Jean-Claude Van Dance (Guyism)



The 20 Worst TV News Fails (HEAVY)





I'M SORRY:

(Sorry that your breath stinks like booze, and your hair smells like old man breath. Repress much?)

Them wacky Welsh fellas in BULLET FOR MY VALENTINE have released the video for "The Last Fight":



The band's new disc, Fever will be out in late April.

as long as we're talking new music, here's a track from RATT's latest disc:


Oooh, that song is just jam-packed with warm, gooey, 80's goodness. Infestation will be out later in April.

From headbangers, we move on to knob gobblers...

our old gal-pal Shay Laren is modeling the tiniest bikini on the ugliest sofa:



Why are we paying attention to the sofa? 1. It's ugly. 2. When you see as much hardcore nudity as we do, you tend to notice OTHER things.

What are the odds of having another video of another girl named Shay on the same day?



Eh, pretty slim... we could have held off till tomorrow to post this clip, but Shay Malone couldn't wait to be gawked at.

Toned, tall Tori Black is ANYTHING but tame...



In fact, she's pretty tawdry in the full uncut clip... and that is one LUCKY vibrator.

To celebrate the opening of Gisele's new solo site, GOT GISELE take a look-see at the new FOUNDRY CAMS video she made for us:






Click on Gisele right now, and watch the full jaw-dropping awesome video!

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?


We're on FourSquare...talking about all the cool shit we do... or wish we did



FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing



Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates



be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep



We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.



We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.



We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.



FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Thursday Links: Snake on a Windshield, Utility Pole Fireworks, Mystery Boobs Galore, KILLSWITCH ENGAGE live in Baltimore, Jamie Bradford, Aletta Ocean

THAT's TERRIBLE:

Get this motherf***in' snake off my motherf***in' windshield!




Get it? It's a Winshield VIPER! Eh? Eh? Ecchhh.

Speeding Car + Utility Pole = Instant Fireworks Display!




OK, sure...there's that li'l issue of a seriously injured driver, but ... LOOK! SPARKLIES!

THAT's NOT-SO TERRIBLE:

(but your bitching and moaning on the other hand, IS..so why not knock it off)





Well golly gee! Whose silver-wrapped boobies could THESE be? (Drunken Stepfather)



...here's a li'l hint...if you click here, you can watch her nailing her ex-husband on a boat





Whuzzis??? Anudder pair of mystery boobs? (WWTDD)



...ok, this one's not so hard...she's only on the cover of EVERY tabloid magazine...



Get Ripped, Shredded, Lean, and all that good stuff (Bullz-Eye)



Kyla Cole is showing off her no-no hole (FreakshowPlanet)



Hidden Tragedies Behind Five Classic Superheroes (Gunaxin)



Arianna Leigh has some Large Areolas (z0d)



RL Stine is getting Lazy (College Humor)



Giselle Monet sucks on the Luckiest Lollipop EVER (Dailyniner)



Murray the Nut’s Greatest Hits, Vol. 3 (FunnyCrave)



World’s First Sound System for Pets is Unleashed (The Bachelor Guy)



How-to: Throw the Ultimate College Party (The Campus Throne)



Remember this Mountain Dew commercial from 1985? (I Heart Chaos)




I'M SORRY:

(Sorry that the only way you can boost your self esteem is to embrace people who have less than you do. Impressive.)

How do them guys in KILLSWITCH ENGAGE maintain their ability to hear after a show like this?



Oh wait, EARPLUGS. Duh.

YOung Jamie Bradford from PLAYBOY's ALL Naturals loves Mexican food and exercising....



NOT at the same time though.

Hungarian hottie Aletta Ocean from Twistys shows off alotta skin in this clip...



Her broken English and surgically-enhanced boobs are what all guys dream about. We think.

Naturally large-breasted New Yorker Jennique from COSMID has 34F-sized hooters...



and THIS is what they look like falling out of her bra in slow-motion.

Our FOUNDRY CAMS girl Brooke made us a finger-licking video. Rob Balducci sent us his new track "Choke". Together, they look like this:






Click on Brooke's Body, crack a beverage, and forget whatever you had planned for the day. she'll be online when you get done mopping up.

Visit some of our other hot properties, won't you?


FOUNDRYNEWS is online, so we can do the blogging thing



Follow us on Twitter, or we'll send wolves to your house to gnaw at your privates



be our friend on Facebook, or we'll send AIDS-infested gerbils through your vents to bite you while you sleep



We've been on MYSPACE since the dawn of time. It was cavemen...and us...and Dane Cook.



We're also on POSTEROUS, so read that shit.



We also have a spot on this thing called NING, and that rhymes. Go us.



FRIEND FEED also has a spot for FoundryMusic... because we're in desperate need of friends.

Monday Links: Making out with a MILF, Fat Girl on a Water Slide, Marathon Runner Passes out, Loads of Links, Christine Mendoza, Heidi Honey, Kendra Ivy

Happy Monday, mister! Did you spend the weekend watching your girl make out with a drunk MILF?

If so, then congratulations.... your adulterous ways will make you the envy of everyone in town.

THAT's TERRIBLE:

Never underestimate the hilarity factor of a fat woman on a giant water slide:

Ha..Ha...Ha...Ker-SPLAT.

No, this isn't one of the three people who died at the Detroit Marathon...

He's Ethiopian...and he passed out mere YARDS from the finish line at Istanbul Marathon.

THAT's NOT-SO TERRIBLE:
(However, your attitude leaves a lot to be desired, so lighten up, sour puss)

Take the weight loss challenge and get your ass in shape EARLY (Muscle Sorority)

Miley Cyrus does 'Sex In The City' With Kim Cattrall (Drunken Stepfather) ... dontcha remember when Kim Catrall was Naked all the time?

Alisha King is Mushing Her King-Sized Breasts (Daily Niner)

Bullz-Eye.com's Movie Picks (Bullz-Eye)

Monika Getnerova is Getting us all Moist (z0d)

Veronica Zemanova and Her Amazing Boobs (Freakshow Planet)

Steven Seagal's Range of Emotions (Ice Ice Babies)

Why Does My...? A Google Search Gem (Yep Yep)

15 Celebrity Camel Toe Photos (FunnyCrave)

Legend of Neil, Season 2, Ep. 7 -- The Finale (atom)

Ted Williams Just Became the Best Halloween Costume of the Year (Unathletic)

44 Pictures Of Sexy Hollywood Women With Beards, Moustaches (DJMICK)

Extended PIXAR Intro - A Parody (College Humor)

Sex, Trolls, and Kanye West in New Spike Jonze Short (The Rap Up)

I'M SORRY:
(Sorry that you'll never amount to anything other than a glorified pool boy. Enjoy the view from down there, kid)

Oh look! Our favorite Filipina Christine Mendoza for you, starting with Stephanie Emma:

Being hot has its advantages apparently; you get to hang out poolside at a mansion in a bikini all day.

Saaay, is that PLAYBOY's Kendra Ivy rolling around in bed?

It sure is, boys and girls! Enjoy the nakedness.

Sexy, perky brunette Heidi Honey is hanging out by the lake:

...without a shirt on, that is. This chick cannot keep her hands off herself. Sheesh.

Speaking of perky brunettes, Aubrielle makes her FOUNDRY CAMS debut with this ass-shaking masterpiece which not only shows off her firm behind, but her carefully-taped perky boobs as well. Thanks to the guys in WINGER for the song "Deal With the Devil" from their upcoming release, Karma

CLICK ON AUBRIELLE TO SEE THE FULL CLIP!

(and now to recap... for the people in the cheap seats...and that means us)

Don't get a hooker. Have an affair with a co-worker, and get drunk looking at our MEDIA SECTION, where you'll see:

Heidi Honey Gets Topless By The Lake
Block of Ice Glows Red Hot
Shyla Jennings Jumps naked on her Bed
Ethiopian Marathon Runner Collapses Yards Away From Finish Line
Kendra Ivy Rolls Around in Bed Naked
Fat Girl Rides The Giant Water Slide
Christine Mendoza in a Tiny Shiny Bikini

These are some of the many social networking programs we're linked up with, so JOIN US, won't you?

Zannel: FoundryMusic
Facebook: FoundryMusic
Posterous: FOUNDRY
Twitter: FoundryMusic (you can get updates to your cell phone here as well)
MySpace: FoundryMusic
NING: FoundryMusic
FRIEND FEED: FoundryMusic
Break.com: NSFW videos (we put all the dirty vids in one location)
LiveVideo: FoundryMusic (updated daily)

 

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